


CONventional Psychopathy Part 2: Control Theory

by Mayalaen



Series: CONventional Psychopathy 'Verse [2]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - Serial Killers, Amnesia, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Angst, Attempted Murder, Begging, Bondage, Breathplay, Broken Bones, Captivity, Crying, Depression, Disturbing Themes, Erotic Electrostimulation, F/M, Fear, Frottage, Humiliation, Injury, Kidnapping, M/M, Manhandling, Masturbation, Mental Instability, Minor Benny Lafitte/Jessica Moore, Minor Castiel/Benny Lafitte, Minor Castiel/Benny Lafitte/Dean Winchester, Minor Character Death, Murder, Murder Husbands, Pain, Painplay, Past Rape/Non-con, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Psychological Torture, Psychological Trauma, Rape Roleplay, Rape/Non-con Elements, Recovery, Rough Sex, Serial Killer Castiel, Serial Killers, Suicidal Thoughts, Torture, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-19
Updated: 2018-05-01
Packaged: 2018-12-17 03:50:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 15
Words: 55,356
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11843400
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mayalaen/pseuds/Mayalaen
Summary: When a stranger comes to Cas, asking for his help with a traumatic event in his past, Dean's not sure if he can handle what Cas is planning to do. The serial killer is still out there and time is running out for a man who doesn't even know he's still a target.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This part is a little different than the last one. It has different warnings, for one, and if you need spoilers or want to ask questions, feel free to message me on Tumblr or email me. I have a Gmail address under this user name. If you decide to skip this part, it won't hinder your reading of the other parts coming in the future.
> 
> [YouTube Playlist for CON 'Verse Arc 2](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ms8sWD4OJiw&list=PLXsFRQOeCtDz72x-jg7ZHnomQ0qX9NNxJ)  
> Each song represents what the character is going through in their head.
> 
> Salt and Shadow - Dean  
> NIN Even Deeper - Benny  
> Ready or Not (I'm Coming) by Oomph! - Cas  
> Famous Last Words by My Chemical Romance - Benny  
> Brutal Love by Green Day - Dean  
> Until It Sleeps by Metallica - Benny  
> The Horror of Our Love by Ludo - Cas  
> Prison Sex by Tool - Benny  
> Coming Undone by Korn - Dean  
> Dear Agony by Breaking Benjamin - Benny  
> Once by Pearl Jam - Cas  
> Survive by Rise Against - Benny  
> Buried Alive by Evans Blue - Dean

> **Control Theory**
> 
> Social control theory proposes that people's relationships, commitments, values, norms, and beliefs encourage them not to break the law. Thus, if moral codes are internalized and individuals are tied into and have a stake in their wider community, they will voluntarily limit their propensity to commit deviant acts.
> 
> The theory seeks to understand the ways in which it is possible to reduce the likelihood of criminality developing in individuals. It does not consider motivational issues, simply stating that human beings may choose to engage in a wide range of activities, unless the range is limited by the processes of socialization and social learning.
> 
> The theory derives from a Hobbesian view of human nature as represented in Leviathan, i.e. that all choices are constrained by implicit social contracts, agreements and arrangements among people. Thus, morality is created in the construction of social order, assigning costs and consequences to certain choices and defining some as evil, immoral and/or illegal.
> 
> Ivan Nye (1985) developed functionalist theories of crime and proposed there were four types of control:
> 
>   * Direct: by which punishment is threatened or applied for wrongful behavior, and compliance is rewarded by parents, family, and authority figures.
>   * Internal: by which a youth refrains from delinquency through the conscience or superego.
>   * Indirect: by identification with those who influence behavior, say because his or her delinquent act might cause pain and disappointment to parents and others with whom he or she has close relationships.
>   * Control through needs satisfaction, i.e. if all an individual's needs are met, there is no point in criminal activity.
> Ngo, Fawn T (2011). "Role-Taking And Recidivism: A Test Of Differential Social Control Theory". JQ: Justice Quarterly 28.5. Academic Search Complete. pp. 667–697. Retrieved 24 Oct 2015.


~ + ~

Castiel had just put another load of laundry in the washing machine and was walking to the kitchen when he heard the doorbell ring. He grumbled to himself, assuming it was another salesman or maybe there were new kids in the area who didn't realize he never bought stuff like candy bars or cookies from them. He didn't even answer the door most of the time.

He looked through the peephole, about to dismiss the man on his porch when he saw the way the man was standing. He was wearing jeans and a loose blue T-shirt, work boots on his feet, but that wasn't interesting in and of itself.

The man had taken three steps back from the door, which most people didn't do, and instead of waiting patiently, staring at the door like salesman and random neighborhood strangers, this man was glancing at the windows and looking over his shoulder, keeping an eye on his surroundings. He shifted the manila folder under his right arm, letting it drop down until his right hand cupped it.

He had a hat on, beard scruffy, his clothes were well-kempt, but he appeared to be the type who didn't care about all that, and instead was dressed by his wife or girlfriend.

Cas stood still as the man took three steps toward the door, knocked again, and took three steps back. This time the man brushed his fingers over his right front jeans pocket. It wasn't a weapon, but Cas was fairly certain it was the man's phone. It was a nervous gesture, not simply a man checking to see if he had remembered his cell phone.

Just as the man sighed and started to turn, Cas opened the door. The man turned around, eyes a little wide as he looked Cas up and down, focusing on where Cas' hands were, as if he was checking for weapons himself.

"Yeah?" Cas said, not bothering to show any sort of interest. It usually worked on people and they left him alone fairly quickly. A sense of danger that most people picked up on even if they didn't realize why.

"Castiel Novak?" the man asked, not moving any closer to Cas. He was purposely keeping his distance.

"Yes," Cas said, noting the way the man licked his lips nervously once he had confirmation that he was speaking to Castiel. That meant the man knew what Cas was, not just who he was.

"My name's Benny," the man said. "I'm sorry t'bother you, and I'm gonna cut right to the chase, since I'm sure you'd prefer none o'the bullshit."

"Okay," Cas said, nodding. The man's accent was slipping through, like he had been trying to get rid of it, but his nerves were betraying him.

"I have a proposition for ya," Benny said, holding up the manila folder. "I'd like t'leave this with you. Take your time lookin' it over. If it's somethin' you'd be interested in, my contact information is in here. If not, I'd appreciate you tellin' me you don't wanna take the case."

"All cases need to go through the CON," Cas said, keeping his hands at his sides even though it was obvious Benny wanted him to take the folder.

Benny let out a nervous chuckle. "I'm sorry, sir. I'm not explainin' myself very well. It's not really a case. At least not yet."

"It still needs to go through the CON," Cas said, not budging a bit.

Benny ran a hand over his beard. Another nervous gesture as he glanced around the neighborhood. "I was taken. A-a few years back. I was held for about three months by a man they never caught. So far I'm the only survivor."

"The CON-"

"Sir, please," Benny said, holding the folder with both hands. "I can't remember a damn thing. Nothin' 'bout the time I was held captive, and it's drivin' me crazy. I can't help the CON and the CON can't help me. Nobody can find him because I can't give 'em anything to investigate."

"What do you want me to do that can't go through the CON?" Cas asked, assuming the man had already tried and they had turned him away. If there was absolutely nothing to go on, giving the case to one of their Cleaners was almost pointless. A shot in the dark.

"I don't need ya to investigate," Benny said, then cleared his throat. Cas could tell the man was preparing himself. Psyching himself up for something big as he took a cleansing breath and looked Cas in the eye. "I want y'ta recreate the experience for me. Maybe jog my memory."

Cas frowned, truly surprised by the request. "I don't think you really want to do that."

"No, I do," Benny said, nodding. He held the folder close to his chest and took another quick look around him before meeting Cas' eye. "I can't take it anymore. The not rememberin'. It's killin' me. I'm scared t'leave the house. I'm scared t'be _in_ the house. I've tried therapy, counseling, and even writin' a damn journal. Nothin' worked. I'm willin' t'pay ya."

"What makes you think I'll do this?" Cas asked, glancing at the folder. "The CON pays me very well. I don't need your money."

Benny shrugged. "I know Cleaners enjoy a challenge. Somethin' fresh. I'm guessin' you've never done anythin' like this b'fore," he said, accent thicker than ever as the realization set in he just might get what he was asking for because Cas wasn't flat out refusing anymore.

"No, I haven't," Cas said, leaning against the door frame, "but if the CON found out about this or you changed your mind after the fact, decided to sue-"

"I won't do that," Benny said, shaking his head. He held up the folder again. "It's all here. I've gone over it with a lawyer, and if you're at all worried yourself, I have no problem with you sending it to your own lawyer. This paperwork here says I literally can't sue ya for anythin' ya do t'me."

"What if I decide to kill you?" Cas asked, keeping his voice casual, watching as Benny ran a hand over his beard again.

"If that happens, you won't get in trouble," Benny said, then held the folder out again. "I've got no family, lost my girlfriend and all my friends over this 'cause I pushed 'em away. I've got a shitty job, a shitty apartment, and nobody left to care if y'do kill me."

"Do you _want_ to die?" Cas asked, because it wouldn't have been the first time someone came to him asking for an assisted suicide.

Benny shook his head. "No, sir. My life is shit, and I have nothin', but I'm doin' this for me. It's a last ditch effort 'cause I _wanna_ live. I _wanna_ have a life again. What I'm doin' right now is survivin'. I'm hopin' you can help me move on."

Cas tilted his head just a bit, eyeing the man. "And if it doesn't work?"

"I know the CON condemns Cleaner-assisted suicide, and I'd never ask ya for that anyway," Benny said, then gave Cas a sad smile. "I'll take care o'that myself if it comes down t'that."

Cas took the folder from Benny, letting his hand drop as he smacked the folder against his leg. "I'll think about it."

"Thank you, sir," Benny said, shoulders dropping in relief. "Take your time, though I would appreciate it if ya let me know your decision one way or the other." Benny gave him another smile, more grateful this time, hope in his eyes, then turned and walked down the steps.

"Benny," Cas said, then waited for the man to turn around, "why did you come to me in particular?"

Benny ducked his head, looking down at the sidewalk and shoving his hands into his pockets before he met Cas' eye again. "Kevin Tran was a good friend'a mine. Said you were the best even though he wasn't a good fit for ya as a Handler."

"He told you to come to me with this?" Cas asked, holding the folder up for a moment.

Benny shook his head. "No. He was one'a the first people I pushed away. He told me stories about you when I was drivin' him to rehab every day for ten weeks. Ya nearly killed him, but the little idiot feels indebted to ya and fuckin' grateful for the experience. I figure that has to mean somethin'. I knew where ya lived back then and took a chance on ya still bein' here."

Cas nodded, then stepped back and closed the front door, not bothering to make sure Benny left, but he heard the old Chevelle roar to life as he walked through the living room and down the hallway.

Cas startled awake, but he wasn't sure why. He squinted at the clock on the nightstand, sighing when he saw it was only ten minutes after six. He usually had no problem sleeping at that time.

A whimper from behind him had Cas rolling over. Dean was on his right side, facing Cas. His brow was furrowed, teeth clenched, and he was breathing heavily through his nose, nostrils flaring. Cas watched him, noting the intermittent shivers and the way his breath was catching.

Dean's eyes suddenly opened wide, and he sat up, panting through his mouth for a moment before he threw the covers off and got out of bed. "I need a shower."

Cas groaned as he rolled onto his stomach and got comfortable again. It was the third time in the last week Dean had done this, and Cas didn't know if he should push Dean to talk about it. It would mean tying Dean down to the bed, because Dean was in no mood to talk about anything even remotely associated with Ruslan, and Cas was certain that's what Dean's nightmare had been about.

Asking Dean about it two nights ago had earned Cas a glare before Dean stormed into the bathroom, slamming the door behind himself. Mary told him Dean needed contact, but she didn't say whether Cas should push him into talking about his experiences. Sure, they had talked some, but not since that first night when Dean had clung to him so tightly, tears streaming down his face, begging Cas not to kick him out for his moment of weakness.

Cas feigned sleep when Dean came out of the bathroom, freshly showered and smelling of herbal shampoo. Instead of climbing into bed naked, Dean pulled on sleep pants, then snagged a hoodie from Cas' closet, pulling it on before he quietly settled down on his side of the bed, back to Cas.

Touching Dean two nights ago hadn't gone well, so Cas didn't bother trying again. Dean's breathing didn't even out for a long time, and he didn't wake with another nightmare as Cas slept lightly beside him.

Dean was sulking. Picking at the food on his plate, the eggs mostly mush as he poked them with his fork. Cas was doing his best to ignore the way it tugged at something inside him. Something that was telling him the sulking was totally adorable. Especially when Dean was wearing nothing but his boxer briefs, hunched over the plate like he was guarding it.

"You've never raped anyone," Dean said, looking down at his plate.

Cas pushed his empty plate away and sat back in the kitchen chair. "First of all, this isn't rape. It's roleplay."

Dean looked up at him, incredulous. "Like that makes a difference in this situation. You're going to terrorize the guy. Benny wants to know the truth, but he doesn't _want_ to go through what you're going to do to him. He just wants the bastard who did it to him the first time to get caught."

"It _does_ make a difference," Cas said, "because even though I've never raped anyone, I've roleplayed the scenario multiple times. It's a scene and not a cold kidnapping and torture."

Dean's eyes widened ever so slightly before he schooled his expression. "This isn't the same thing. He's innocent and this isn't some fun sex game for him. He's not even gay."

"That brings me to my second point," Cas said. "You haven't experienced what he has. Your kidnapper isn't still lurking in the shadows because he's dead."

Dean looked down at his plate again, the subject still not easy for him to talk about.

Cas leaned forward, resting his elbows on the table. "Are you upset because an innocent man is going to be tortured or are you upset because I'm the one that's going to be doing it?"

Dean muttered a quick "fuck you" as he stood up and turned away, heading for the bedroom.

"Sit. Down," Cas said, voice firm and with just enough menace that Dean froze in place. "Now."

Dean sighed, but did as he was told, looking up at Cas with a challenge in his eyes. "What?"

"I can't read you," Cas said, shaking his head. "I don't know why this upsets you. I don't know if you're jealous or just angry that I'm going against some of my own principles. Principles that you built up in your head to be something they're not. For all I know, you're hurt that I'm going to be sticking my dick in someone else's ass."

Dean tried to hide it, but Cas saw the way Dean's eyes flicked away from him. It was a small movement, but it was enough. Cas couldn't predict normal human behavior or read a facial expression, but he picked up on tells.

Cas kept a straight face even though he felt like chuckling. "You think I'm going to get a taste for my dick in his ass and you're not going to be good enough for me anymore? I'm going to kick you out and-"

"No!" Dean growled, then shook his head, his body almost vibrating with agitation. "You're mine. You're fuckin' mine, not his!"

Cas shook his head. "I'm nobody's possession. Neither are you."

The flash of hurt that Dean immediately tried to hide showed just how much it was all affecting him. "You don't want me?"

"Stop," Cas said, reaching forward and grabbing Dean's left wrist, giving him the physical contact Mary said Dean needed so much, and he could feel the tension bleed out of Dean just a bit even from that small amount of contact. "Stop looking at this like I'm some lovesick puppy led around by his heartstrings."

Dean snorted. "So you don't-"

"Stop," Cas said again, firmer and giving Dean's wrist a squeeze. "You're not here in my home because I've been blinded by love. My hormones and endorphins don't flare every time you're near, and I don't feel that swell in my chest like you do."

Dean tried to pull his hand away, but Cas had a good hold and yanked him closer. "Let me go."

"I'm not done yet," Cas said. "I like you. I want you around. I enjoy your presence in my life beyond being my Handler. The things you do that annoy me pale in comparison to the way you have difficulty falling asleep without some part of your body touching mine. The way you laugh at stupid movies. The way you push and push, but never too far."

Dean scowled down at the table, as if every word Cas was saying only made things worse, and for all Cas knew it did.

"I don't feel the same things most people feel. Or at least I don't feel them in the same way," Cas continued. "If you want or need that, you're not going to get it from me. You knew that. You grew up watching it every day. Did your mom give a shit about anybody else but you, your father, and your brother?"

Dean shook his head. "No. Everyone else was a potential plaything. Something to hurt until it wasn't fun anymore. I just didn't realize I was a plaything to you."

Cas chuckled, and soon it turned into genuine laughter when Dean gave him a dirty look. There was pain in Dean's eyes, but Cas couldn't help it. Dean couldn't see what was right in front of him.

"This isn't funny, you asshole," Dean hissed.

"Yeah, it definitely is," Cas said, still chuckling. "Do you really think I would've put up with even a fraction of the shit you pull if I was just playing with you until you weren't fun anymore?"

"The shit I pull?" Dean asked, incredulous and too upset to hear what Cas was trying to say. "What, like caring about you and dragging your ass out into the living room every once in a while so you'll watch a fuckin' movie with me?"

Cas rolled his eyes, then stood up and pulled Dean along behind him. Dean grumbled, but let Cas lead him into the bedroom. "Look around the room."

Dean sighed. "Fine. I'll play another game," he said as he made a production out of turning around to look all around the room. "Happy?"

"Does this room look like it did before you started sleeping with me?" Cas asked.

Dean frowned. "You're complaining about the clothes in the corner again? I'll pick them up," he said, then gestured toward the dresser, where his knife and wallet were sitting. "Those too."

Cas pulled him into the bathroom, only a little surprised Dean wasn't fighting him. "Does the bathroom look the same as it used to?"

"Dude, why the fuck are you doing this?" Dean asked, frustrated and hurt and still not ready to look at what was in front of his face. "I don't get your point. If it's that you want me to clean up my shit and leave, then just say so."

Cas slammed Dean back against the wall and pressed his body against him, his face inches from Dean's. Cas could feel Dean's breath on his lips, and Dean's eyes widened with the mild violence of the whole thing.

"I've never allowed a plaything into my bed," Cas said, voice low and threatening in a way that he knew would get Dean's attention. "I'd never allow a plaything to leave a mess or change my routines or even call me in the middle of the night without kicking the shit out of them the next time I saw them."

Dean looked over at the counter top to his left. The hairbrush and can of deodorant were sitting out, and it wasn't a terrible mess, but it was Dean's. Cas _never_ left his own stuff out.

"Everything in my life is compartmentalized," Cas said, easing back just a little and letting his voice become more soothing instead of threatening. "My victims get a box. The CON gets a box. The pizza man even has his own box because he's useful but annoying, and if he asks me one more time about the way my hair sticks up all messy I'm going to hurt him. Not kill him, but he'll definitely never come back here."

The corners of Dean's mouth twitched a bit, and Cas could see amusement in Dean's eyes. The pizza guy loved to flirt, thought Cas was hot, but he had no clue Cas was a serial killer. No clue that Cas wasn't interested in him and was _this_ close to doing some damage.

"Benny has a different box," Cas said, and Dean's eyes shifted away again. It was a subtle tell, but it was obvious Dean still didn't like the idea at all. "He's in a box I've never used before. You have your own box, and it's nothing like Benny's. I like your box. I want it there even though it's inconvenient and frustrating and will probably get me into deep shit someday."

Dean looked him in the eye, his body relaxing just a fraction. "I can't completely separate things like that."

"You can. You just pick and choose what you want to do it with," Cas said. "What makes this any different than you shoving a rusty pipe into Eiker's ass? Did you expect me to get jealous when you did that?"

Cas watched as Dean's world tilted, as ideas and beliefs he had for a long time were challenged. As he realized why Cas was saying what he had said. Dean was staring over Cas' left shoulder as he worked it all out, and then Dean's eyes focused on him again.

"Your dick's a tool to use on Benny," Dean said, wrapping his arms around Cas' middle. "It's not a tool when you fuck me because I'm not a plaything or a case for you."

"Getting off on the screams of a victim feels different than making you scream until I come," Cas said, leaning in and brushing his lips over Dean's right ear.

Dean chuckled. "You like my box."

"And that's why the offer's still open to assist me with Benny," Cas said as he pulled back.

"So can I fuck him?" Dean asked, smirking.

"No," Cas said, smacking Dean's thigh before walking out of the bathroom.

"Wait! Why not?!" Dean asked, following him.

"Because you can't compartmentalize," Cas said, heading for the kitchen.

"You said I can, but that I just don't want to," Dean said, poking him in the back.

"Yup," Cas said as he started clearing the kitchen table, hiding his smile as Dean started washing the pans.

"So I'll just compartmentalize," Dean said, shrugging.

Cas put the last of the dishes into the sink and turned to Dean. "Think about it before you do it. I don't have a problem with it, but once you cross that line your principles kept you from crossing, you can never go back. It's better to change where your lines are than to cross them."

"Sounds like you're speaking from experience," Dean said, still attempting to keep the conversation light.

"I am," Cas said, nodding. "Just think about it first."

"Okay, I will," Dean said, handing Cas a clean dish to dry.

They finished cleaning the kitchen in companionable silence. It was comfortable and casual. Something Cas didn't know he would enjoy until it was Dean he was sharing it with.


	2. Chapter 2

Dean was pretending to sleep while Cas looked through a PDF Benny had sent him, spread out over the chair in the office, legs dangling off one of the arms and his neck at an awkward angle, head resting on his left shoulder.

Cas kept his eyes on the computer screen as Dean slowly moved his cell phone, obviously sure he was getting away with it. Cas wasn't sure why Dean was trying to be so sneaky, but he let it go for a few minutes before turning to Dean.

"I know you're awake," Cas said, then glanced at the phone. "What are you doing?"

"Nothing," Dean said, then poked at the screen a few times. "Just checking my messages."

Cas clicked to the next page of the PDF and started reading again. Benny had documented things he could remember, which wasn't much, and the whole thing read like a fevered dream. He remembered going out late one night, bumping into a woman at the supermarket who was really hot, but he had a girlfriend at the time, so when she offered him her phone number, he politely refused.

He had walked her out to her car because she was alone and the neighborhood wasn't the greatest. He watched her drive away, then turned to walk back to his car, a grocery bag in his left hand, and then nothing.

He remembered waking up in the hospital, the pain punching through the heavy doses of medication they were giving him. He remembered a counselor sitting at his bedside, tucking her red hair behind her right ear, talking softly, and never coming close enough to touch. Careful of him in a way that made everything even worse.

He remembered the first time he saw one of the scars that had been left on his body. He remembered being grateful his girlfriend didn't leave him because of it.

"What are you doing?" Cas asked again, irritation making his nerves tingle.

"I'm just playing a game on my phone," Dean said, and Cas could easily tell he was lying.

He sighed. "You can either stop lying or I can come over there and shove the phone up your ass."

Dean blinked at him, trying for innocence and failing miserably, then grimaced. "I'm changing my background."

Cas frowned. "Why would you lie to me about that?"

Dean sat up, holding the phone to his chest protectively. "Because I think there's a good chance you're gonna break my phone if you see the background."

"Why would I care about a-oh," Cas said as Dean turned the phone, a picture of Cas sitting at his desk on his screen with a few icons on the right side of the picture.

"I didn't have any pictures of you besides the ones in your profile at the CON and your driver's license," Dean said, a sheepish grin on his face. "I wanted another picture of you. I wanted a few pictures of you."

Cas wasn't really sure how he felt about that. On the one hand, he hated having his picture taken. His face in more places wasn't a good thing, given his line of work. On the other hand, Dean wanted it for himself. It was something couples did, and Cas didn't even know how to respond. If he should respond.

"Can I keep it?" Dean asked softly. There was a vulnerable quality to his voice. A softness in his eyes.

"Do you have any other pictures of me on your phone?" Cas asked, something in his belly fluttering just a bit.

Dean looked down at the floor, both hands covering the phone. "Yes?" he said, voice going up in pitch at the end as if it had been a question.

"Show me the one you're most scared of me finding," Cas said, resting his elbows on the desk.

Dean's cheeks flushed. "Do I have to?"

"I didn't say you have to delete the pictures," Cas said, then paused, "yet."

Dean nodded, understanding the deal. He stood up and walked to the desk, setting the phone down so that the picture was right side up for Cas.

Cas should have felt panicked. He should have felt violated. He should have been pissed. Instead, something deep inside was warmed when he realized Dean had taken a picture of him when he was sleeping.

"It's my favorite one of you," Dean said, voice almost a whisper.

Cas' face was very relaxed in sleep. He had kicked the blanket down and only a corner was draped over his right thigh. He was lying on his left side, arms wrapped around the pillow and half of his face smashed against the pillowcase. Cas' cock was soft, and the shadows in the room made it hard to see, but the curves of his body looked good, and he didn't think he had ever seen such a beautiful picture of himself. He liked it.

"Please don't make me delete it," Dean said, a dejected tone to his voice that told Cas he already assumed he would have to.

Cas picked up the phone and handed it to Dean. "You can keep the pictures," he said, then turned back to the PDF document.

Dean stood there for a moment, barely breathing. "Thanks, Cas," he whispered before sitting down on the overstuffed chair, a big grin on his face.

It was too early to be awake, but Cas wasn't sleeping well anyway. He rolled over, not all that surprised to find he was alone in bed. Dean had been already asleep by the time Cas went to bed the night before. He was an early riser, and Cas considered it a good thing because he could wake up when he wanted to instead of being disturbed.

Cas took his time showering and getting dressed in a pair of faded blue jeans and a band T-shirt he pulled out of Dean's drawer. The hard rhythm of classic rock was softly playing in the office as Cas grabbed a bagel, cut it in half, and put it in the toaster. He poured himself a glass of milk while he waited for the bagel to brown, deciding on peanut putter and jelly as toppings instead of cream cheese and jelly.

After using the last of the strawberry jelly, he added that item to his mental list of grocery items they needed along with another gallon of milk. He walked into the office with the plate of bagels in his left hand and the glass of milk in his right, giving Dean a small smile when he looked up from his spot on the couch facing the door.

"Morning," Dean said, still in nothing but his pajama bottoms. He looked down at the shirt Cas was wearing and froze for just a moment, an emotion Cas couldn't place flitting across his face. There were a few folders sitting next to him on the couch, his bare feet up on the coffee table, and a mug of coffee was balancing precariously on his left knee.

"What are you working on?" Cas asked, setting his plate on the coffee table and lowering himself onto the loveseat. He had forgotten to bring a paper towel or napkin in with him, and he grimaced as he picked up the slice of bagel. His fingers were going to get sticky.

"Looking through some possible cases," Dean said, tapping the folder closest to him with his right index finger. He held up his phone with his left hand. "Got a notice from the CON a few minutes ago. We've got fifteen minutes to respond to a pick-up. You want it?"

"Is it something I want?" Cas asked, never one to turn down an offer like that when he had the time.

Dean nodded. "I think you'll like it. Disembowelments are his thing."

Cas smiled. "Sounds like fun. I haven't had one of those in a few months."

"Okay, I'll respond to the coordinator," Dean said, texting them on his phone. "You want me to go pick him up? He's sedated, so I could get him home and into the kill room by myself."

"Who's the coordinator?" Cas asked. He didn't usually like interacting with the coordinators anyway, but some were more tolerable than others.

Dean set his phone down on the case files to his right, then picked up his mug. "Ellsworth."

Cas grunted, then shook his head. "I'd rather go grocery shopping than deal with him."

"Pick up some steaks," Dean said, then downed the rest of his coffee. "I'll grill them up with some peppers, onions, and potatoes."

"Deal," Cas said, then took the last bite of his bagel and finished his milk, grimacing as he picked up his plate with sticky fingers and headed for the kitchen.

It usually didn't take long for Cas to do the grocery shopping, but Dean's car was already in the garage by the time Cas got back. He unloaded the groceries and put them away, taking a quick peek out the kitchen window to make sure Dean remembered to close the door on the kill room. Even if the man was sedated, there was a chance he could come to and try to escape. Cas didn't need trouble with the neighbors.

Once the groceries were put away, Cas changed into scrub pants and a plain white T-shirt. He normally bought shirts in packs of five. Cheap and easy enough to throw away when they were ripped or stubborn stains wouldn't come out. If the latest pick-up was a disembowelment and nothing else, Cas was going to want to play for a while, and being able to see his own blood on Cas' shirt would go a long way to setting the scene. He didn't always forgo his apron, but he just felt like it with the pick-up.

After pulling white socks on, then stepping into his rain boots, he headed out back. The door was locked, and Cas used his key to get in. As soon as he opened the door, he heard struggling, but Dean was calmly sitting on the counter top opposite the door, playing a game on his phone.

Dean looked up. "Hey, Cas," he said, hopping down and slipping his phone into his pocket. He tapped a folder that was sitting on the counter top with his index finger. "Here's all the info. It's not a complicated case. Pick-ups never are, but this guy just enjoys disemboweling."

The man was in his mid thirties. It appeared they had captured him while he was at work. He was wearing khakis, a white T-shirt, an orange vest with yellow reflector stripes, and boots that were solid enough to withstand a job like road construction. The man was fighting the restraints, but there was no way he would get free. Dean had gagged him with duct tape, but he must have put something in the man's mouth too.

"Andrej Vesely," Dean said as he headed for the door, pulling the key out of his pocket. "He bit one of the arresting officers. Took his index finger off. I think the dude is still in surgery to reattach it. Have fun."

Cas took the key from Dean, then ogled Dean's ass before locking the door behind him and put the key in the drawer where it belonged. Andrej was yelling around the gag, but Cas couldn't make out the words. He made his way across the room, in no hurry, and picked up the folder.

"They picked you up for unpaid parking tickets," Cas said, smirking when the man smacked his head against the table and let out a growl of rage. "It must be frustrating to realize you could've gotten away with it for a lot longer had you just paid the tickets. Or you could've refrained from being an asshole who failed to obey posted signs and parking meters. Who knows how long you could've continued disemboweling people."

Cas looked through the photos of the last victim. It was Andrej's girlfriend. She had cheated on him, and his punishment was vicious. Less than eight months previous, he was brought in for questioning on a case involving a convenience store clerk. Andrej had been in a fight with the man over over lottery tickets, and the clerk's body was found two days after that altercation. The clerk had been disemboweled and strung up in the bathroom of the convenience store.

The security system had been destroyed, so there was no evidence. No witnesses came forward, and Andrej left no evidence behind, so they had to let him go. Two years before that, his ex-wife went missing and was never found. Fifteen years before that, his parents went on vacation and never came back, having been found in the woods more than one hundred miles away from their home. The hikers had described the scene as something out of a horror movie.

Andrej was only sixteen when social services sent him to live with his aunt. It was his mother's sister, Bonny. Her two-year-old didn't survive the attack by wild dogs from the neighborhood that happened only a week after Andrej moved in with her.

Andrej had been babysitting at the time, and all reports showed a traumatized teen who had not only lost his parents, but also his cousin in a tragic and very horrific way. No one imagined the sixteen-year-old, who had bravely fought off the dogs and earned himself permanent scars on his arms and hands, had been the one to kill the toddler. They hadn't been able to pin anything else on him over the years either.

"Ellsworth is an asshole," Cas said as he walked up to the table and looked Andrej in the eye, "but he's very good at his job. Anybody else would've just held you overnight, then let the courts handle all the parking tickets."

Andrej's face was turning a lovely shade of pink, his eyes welling with tears. He wasn't scared. He wasn't crying because he knew he was going to die. He was so furious that his body was reacting to the rage.

"Ellsworth put it all together," Cas said, then chuckled. "He did my job for me, then offered to let me play in his sandbox. I can't stand the man, but for some reason he likes me. I haven't disemboweled anyone in months, so I'm going to enjoy this."

Andrej's body was shivering, and he glared daggers at Cas. Cas set the folder on his rolling cart, which Dean had been kind enough to stock with the supplies he would need, and picked up the scissors. He made quick work of Andrej's clothes, saving the gag for last. After kicking Andrej's clothes and boots aside, Cas cut the tape and ripped it off the man's face. A handkerchief had been shoved into Andrej's mouth, so Cas pulled it out and dropped it onto the floor.

"None of the...," Andrej started, but his mouth was too dry, so he paused long enough to wet his mouth, then looked to Cas again. "None of the things they've said about me are true!" Andrej said immediately.

"I'm sure you have explanations for it all," Cas said, "but it's just too many coincidences to ignore."

"I didn't kill Abby," Andrej said, then sighed, forcing himself to calm down. Reasoning with the Cleaner to save his skin was something he thought he could pull off. "It was my fault that she got out of the house, and I'll never forgive myself, but I didn't kill her. And I didn't kill my parents. I didn't kill my girlfriend or my ex. I didn't do any of it."

"Ellsworth isn't sloppy," Cas said. "You were behind bars for only thirteen hours while he pulled enough evidence up to support his hunch."

"I thought you guys did your own investigations," Andrej said, eyes rolling in his head as he tried to catch sight of the folder on Cas' cart. "You didn't look into my case at all? You just let them tell you I'm a murderer and that I deserve death?"

"In this case, yes," Cas said with a nod. "It doesn't happen all that often, but probably more often than you think. The police pick someone up on a misdemeanor, then discover warrants or suspicious things in their past."

"But that's _your_ job!" Andrej said, exasperated. "You're supposed to investigate and use your skills to figure out if I'm a killer or not, then kill me if you think I've done those horrible things they say I have. This isn't right. Ellsworth isn't right."

"I'm a killer," Cas said with a shrug. "The government says you're a killer, they've handed you over to me, and I get to do something I love doing. The only one who doesn't benefit from this is you."

"Someone framed me," Andrej said. "Please look into my case. I've been set up. I'm innocent."

Cas set the scissors down on the cart and picked up his favorite knife. It felt cold in his hand and fit just right. Felt like it was home and an extension of his own body. "People don't want to imagine that children can kill. That they can be ruthless and cruel. That's why no one suspected you of killing your parents or your cousin. If a Cleaner had interviewed you, you wouldn't be alive today. Your girlfriend and ex would still be alive. The convenience store clerk would still be alive."

"I didn't do any of it!" Andrej said, his bottom lip quivering as he worked up some tears. "Please! Do your own investigation! Please! You can take me back to the station. Put me back behind bars. You don't even have to release me. Just send me back, and I'll wait there while you investigate."

"Oh, did you think I believed you?" Cas asked, then tsked. He ran his fingers over the scars on Andrej's right arm. They were pretty. "No one ever questioned why the deepest part of your wounds are closest to your wrists with trails that become thinner leading up your arms instead of down. Do you know how someone gets scars like that?"

Andrej closed his eyes. He had no arguments left. No way to get out of it.

"You see, when someone uses a dull instrument on themselves, mimicking an animal attack," Cas said as he tapped the end of his knife against Andrej's right wrist, "they're going to push the blade in deep right about here, then drag it up," he said as he trailed the sharp edge of the knife over Andrej's skin. Blood welled up in the shallow cut. "All your wounds are self-inflicted. What did you use? It doesn't look like a knife."

"A broken toy," Andrej said, then gasped as Cas poked the tip of his knife into Andrej's belly, close to his left hip. "It had jagged edges and didn't leave anything behind."

"Did you still want me to investigate?" Cas asked, only pausing for a moment before dragging the knife over Andrej's lower belly, opening the skin and exposing the yellow fat. Andrej was a bit underweight, so the layer of fat wasn't all that thick, but it was still enough.

Andrej screamed, thrashing about and only serving to open the wound more. Cas set the knife down on the table by Andrej's right hip, then pulled on some gloves. He pushed his fingers into the man's belly, groaning as Andrej lost his voice for a moment and the warmth surrounded his fingers. He slid through the blood and intestines, then pulled a handful out, letting it drape over Andrej's pubic area.

"This always looks so pretty," Cas said, arranging the intestines over Andrej's dick and thighs. "It doesn't bleed as much as you'd think it would, which means I can play with you a lot longer than one would imagine. But you know all about that. You know how beautiful this looks."

Andrej was still screaming hard enough that he most likely didn't hear much of what Cas was saying, but Cas was more interested in the purplish red intestines and the dark red blood coating them. Blood trailed over Andrej's hips and down onto the table as Andrej's screams died down and only gasping breaths could be heard.

"I almost forgot," Cas said, smiling as he found what he was looking for on the cart. Dean was even better at this than Cas could have hoped for. He'd put out tin snips just for Cas. "You bit off the arresting officer's finger."

Andrej was shivering, his body going into shock. He'd bitten his tongue and lips while struggling and screaming, thin rivulets of blood dripping down his face and neck.

Cas' breath caught in his chest, the sound of bone crunching under the tin snips enough to make his cock jerk inside his pants. Andrej gurgled, and Cas looked down, frowning when he realized Andrej had bitten his tongue again and was drowning in the blood running down the back of his throat.

"I wasn't done playing yet," Cas said, dropping the tin snips and opening a drawer behind him, pulling out a suction bulb with a long, clear plastic tube attached to it.

He pushed the tube down Andrej's throat, holding the man's head with his left hand, and compressed the bulb at the end of the tube before quickly letting it go, watching as blood was sucked into the tube, a wet sound that had Cas' cock twitching. He pulled the tube out and squirted the excess blood onto the floor, then repeated the process twice more until Andrej could easily breathe again.

"You sick fuck," Andrej whimpered, his voice gravely from the abuse to his vocal cords not only from screaming, but also the tube being shoved down his throat.

"Your victims didn't get a quick death, and by law I can draw this out to a reasonable length of time considering your crimes," Cas said with a smirk.

"Somebody needs to put you down," Andrej said, closing his eyes as tears ran down the sides of his face.

"Someone probably will some day," Cas said as he set the bulb down on the table near Andrej's right thigh, then picked up his knife again. "They'll have to catch me first."

Andrej lost his voice as Cas plunged his hand through the subcutaneous fat of his gaping stomach wound, and by the time Cas was finished playing with him, everything from Andrej's abdominal cavity was draped over his thighs, crotch, and chest. It took a long time for him to finally stop breathing.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For anyone interested, I've created a Sims version of Cas' house. There are currently three posts: [The Property and Outside](https://mayalaen.tumblr.com/post/165024755424/conventional-psychopathy-the-sims-series-set-1), [Inside the House](https://mayalaen.tumblr.com/post/165025012794/conventional-psychopathy-the-sims-series-set-2), and [Cas' Kill Room](https://mayalaen.tumblr.com/post/165025129614/conventional-psychopathy-the-sims-series-set-3).
> 
> It's part of a series I'm posting on Tumblr, and soon there will be more indoor and action shots and videos of Cas’ house and kill room (both SFW and NSFW), Dean’s house, Sam and Jess’ house, Benny’s house, Ruslan’s cabin, and more. If you'd like to follow the series, [Click Here for #the sims series](https://mayalaen.tumblr.com/tagged/the%20sims%20series).

Benny had been standing on the porch for well over twenty minutes. Cas continued working on files in his office, letting Benny work up the courage to ring the doorbell. 

Dean was antsy. Anxious to get started, but still nervous about trying something so new. So different. Cas could feel the tension in the room, and he had nearly snapped at Dean to knock it off when Dean kept clicking his pen, but Cas was focused on Benny, ready for the challenge. He didn't really want to say anything that would flip Dean's mood and bring about another discussion.

"Should we go out there and drag him in?" Dean asked, shifting on the couch opposite Cas' desk.

"Everything that happened to Benny took away his control," Cas said as he deleted some spam emails. "He's doing this for himself, and letting him come to us on his terms will give him that control. He's going to use that act of control and bravery to endure what we do to him."

"Or maybe he's just scared out of his mind," Dean said, scooting forward on the couch and resting his elbows on his thighs.

The doorbell rang, and Cas pointed at Dean. "Stay."

Dean grumbled, but did as he was told. Cas walked to the front door, bare feet scuffing on the wood flooring, and opened the door wide for Benny, standing just inside as the man shifted awkwardly for a moment, then stepped into the house.

"Change of clothes and all my identification," Benny said, gesturing to the duffel slung over his left shoulder.

They had already gone over all the papers, signed what needed signing. They had talked multiple times about what they were going to do. There was nothing left but to get started. The nervous energy pouring off Benny was even worse than Dean's.

Cas took the duffel from Benny, dropping it on the floor behind him, and eyed Benny closely, taking a quick sniff to check for alcohol on his breath.

"You haven't taken any medications or recreational drugs? Haven't had anything to drink?" he asked even though he hadn't smelled anything other than the cinnamon toothpaste Benny liked to use and the light tang of sweat, more acidic than the other times Benny had been at the house because this time he was really fucking scared.

"No, sir," Benny said, shaking his head.

"If you're lying to me, this is going to kill you," Cas said, then pushed a needle into Benny's neck.

Benny stiffened, gasping as he grabbed hold of Cas, terrified even though he had known it wasn't going to be fun. Cas wrapped his arms around Benny's middle as the man slumped against him, Benny's hat tumbling to the floor and his boots flipping the corner of the rug up over itself.

"Want some help?" Dean asked, peeking around the archway into the kitchen.

"You can grab his legs," Cas said, even though he didn't really need the help.

The two of them easily hefted Benny and made their way to the basement stairs. Cas went down first because he wasn't sure how skilled Dean was at walking backwards down steps with a full-grown, unconscious man in his arms, but Dean had no problem with keeping a good hold of Benny and worked well with Cas as they made their way down.

The basement was already prepared for Benny. Cas and Dean had done it together days ago. There wasn't much stored in the basement anyway, but he wanted what little he did have to be out of Benny's reach. The reports said the basement Benny was kept in had a dirt floor, given all the tiny stones and dirt that had been embedded in his wounds, so they had spread a mix of potting soil, sand, and quarter minus on the cement, hoping it would suffice and give Benny the experience he needed to remember even a little bit. 

Eye hooks had been drilled into the walls, ceiling, and floor. There was a cart full of instruments on the south side of the house, opposite the stairs. A used queen-sized mattress was thrown down into the middle of the room. Cas and Dean had both urinated on it multiple times over the last few days and had rubbed dirt into it because they hadn't been able to find a soiled mattress in an alleyway that Cas would allow in his home.

Other than that, the basement was empty. All but two of the overhead fluorescent lights had been unscrewed, and the window had been covered with newspaper, just in case the neighbors decided to peek in. Cas didn't think they would, but he wanted to be careful. Benny could scream all he wanted. The window was double-paned.

Benny was breathing evenly when Cas and Dean put him down on the bed, and after a quick check of his pulse, Cas started to take the clothing off.

"Are you still okay with doing this?" Cas asked as he pulled Benny's dark brown T-shirt over the man's head and tossed it to the side.

"I think so," Dean said as he untied Benny's boots and pulled them off.

"He's going to be disoriented and scared when he wakes up," Cas said.

"I know," Dean said, pulling off Benny's socks. "You told me."

"There's a good chance he'll vomit, cry, _and_ piss himself. Maybe even shit himself," Cas said as he unbuckled Benny's belt. "In fact, there's almost no chance of him getting through this experience without losing control of his bodily functions at some point."

"I know," Dean said, nodding.

Cas yanked on Benny's jeans and boxers, pulling them down his legs. It wasn't until he tried to hand the clothes to Dean that he realized Dean was staring.

"Fuck," Dean breathed.

"You saw all the photos," Cas said, and maybe it sounded dismissive or callous, but Dean had seen the damages already. He knew what had been done to the man.

Dean turned away, snatching the jeans and boxers from Cas as if he was already trying to ignore the scars all over Benny's legs, chest, and stomach. "I know, but it's different when he's right fuckin' here. The police photos were, I don't know. Cold. Impersonal. I couldn't really see his face."

"It's normal to disconnect," Cas said, pulling facts from his head. Things he read about how normal people react to awful events and empathy response in normal individuals when faced with the brutal torture of a fellow human being. "It's what allows law enforcement officers to look at horrific things without losing their minds or their humanity."

Dean shoved all the clothes into the plastic bag he pulled out of his pocket and tossed it down by the bottom of the staircase. "Haven't even seen his fuckin' back yet," he grumbled.

"Try not to think of him as a person," Cas said as he rolled Benny over and secured his wrists behind his back with nylon rope. It wouldn't do as much damage as the chains had done when Benny had been captured before, but Cas did have chains available if Benny needed them.

Cas planned on starting off with fear tactics and pain that didn't involve permanent damage. If that didn't work, he would move onto heavier things, but he wanted to give Benny a chance to recall what had happened without doing a lot more damage. The guy had been through a lot, and taking away his health again wasn't going to give him a good chance at recovery.

"A serial killer looks at a human as a plaything," Cas said, checking that the rope wasn't too tight before slipping a blindfold over Benny's eyes. "The reactions they can get from a human as they hurt and kill them are no different than a kid with a brand new chemistry set. The less human he is to you, the less you'll feel sorry for him. The less you'll hold back."

Cas tied Benny's ankles, then turned him onto his stomach so he wouldn't lose circulation to his hands. Cas looked up and found Dean standing at the end of the bed, staring at Benny's right thigh.

"Look at me," Cas said, stepping between Dean and Benny. He needed to try something else. Disconnect wasn't working for Dean.

"I'm okay," Dean said, frowning.

"He came to us for help," Cas said, looking Dean in the eye. "This is his last resort. If we don't help him, he's going to kill himself."

"He told you that?" Dean asked, wincing.

"It's not hard to see," Cas said, then sighed. "He's pushed everyone away, he's about to lose his job, his home, and he's got nothing left once that happens. He's surviving, not living. I'm certain that if he doesn't get some answers here, he'll go home and kill himself."

Dean huffed, running a hand over the back of his neck as he peered around Cas. "I know why you're telling me this, but I can't help thinking there's another way."

"He's tried," Cas said, trying to be patient. "Put yourself in his place, but don't lose yourself there. He was tortured for months, raped repeatedly on a daily basis, thought he was going to die, and even wished he would die because it was so awful. He was dropped off in a park, alone and cold and terrified. His captor was never caught, so he's been living with the fear that at any moment he could be taken again because he's the only one who has survived this serial killer. The only one who could identify him."

"Yeah, I read that," Dean said, nodding.

"Now imagine you had no one," Cas said gently. "You go home at night to an empty house after working all day at a job where you don't connect with anyone anymore. You don't fit in anywhere. You don't even fit in your own skin anymore. Now imagine what little comfort and safety you have being taken away because you're losing your job, which means you lose your house. What's left? What do you have to live for? Why do you _want_ to live?"

"Catching the guy that did it to me," Dean said, shrugging.

"He's not like us," Cas said, pulling Dean closer and wrapping his arms around Dean's middle. "Everything that happened to him has been locked away in his head because he couldn't face it. He knows he can't win, can't find his kidnapper, can't kill him, and he knows, because of his weaknesses, that the police can't find his captor either."

"But if he has nothing left to live for, then why not die trying to find him?" Dean asked.

"He doesn't have the skills to do that," Cas said, shrugging. "He wouldn't know where to start, and he's probably tried. In the meantime, he's living with the fact that his weakness is keeping his captor on the streets, and more people are dying because of it."

Dean sighed. "I thought you wanted me to see him as a plaything. This only makes him more human to me."

"I made a mistake," Cas said, tilting his head to the side. "I thought I could get you to detach, but then I remembered why you're so good at what you do."

Dean pushed him away. "Yeah, yeah. Rub it in again how I'm not Cleaner material."

Cas grabbed Dean's arm and yanked him back until Dean slammed into him. "You care about the victims, and you care about the potential victims, just like Benny. The difference between you and him is you have the skills and assets to find the guy and get rid of him. You have the guts to go through with it once you find him, which is something I suspect he wouldn't be able to do. Your inner drive won't stop until the people his captor was going to kill are safe."

Dean looked away for a moment, uneasy with the praise. "We're still hurting an innocent man."

"Tell me you think this is wrong and walk away," Cas said, completely sure Dean wouldn't do it. "I won't think any less of you."

"You fucker," Dean said without any real heat behind it. Instead it was resignation.

Cas grinned before leaning in and kissing the corner of Dean's mouth. "One day you should ask your dad about this situation. Ask him what he would do, and I think you'll see why I decided to change my tactics. Why I decided to stop forcing you to view Benny as a thing. Why I pushed you into his head instead of helping you detach."

Dean let out a huff of laughter. "I don't need to ask him. I know my dad. He'd already be waking Benny up with a cold bath and twisting his balls until he screamed in the hopes he'd remember everything."

"Your dad's not cold or heartless, and in fact he cares a little too much, just like you," Cas said, holding onto Dean as he stiffened a little in Cas' arms. "We complement each other like your parents complement each other."

Dean rolled his eyes. "Aren't you the one who tells me not to get mushy?" he asked, pinching Cas' side.

Cas chuckled. "It's not mushy when there's a person tied up in your basement."

Dean let out a bark of laughter. "Your sense of humor is very charming."

Cas grabbed the bag of clothing and headed up the stairs, Dean trailing behind him. He wasn't worried about Benny moving around in the basement because if he did, he would find some of the tools that would be used on him in the future. It would terrify him even more, just like it probably did the first time Benny had been captured.

Benny didn't know how to get out of the ropes, and even if he did, the lights were off and Cas had the advantage. He could still take Benny down again, and in fact, Cas was hoping it would turn out that way. It would reinforce Benny's impotence.

"So what do we do first?" Dean asked once they got back into the kitchen.

Cas headed for the living room and picked up the duffel. "You're going to order pizza and we're going to watch a movie."

Dean huffed out a laugh. "No, really. What are we going to do?"

Cas turned to Dean. "I get to pick the movie, and I also want pineapple on the pizza. I don't care what else you get on it," he said, then started going through the duffel. "Oh, and you're talking to the pizza man when he comes. I'm in the mood to hurt somebody and he might mention my hair again."

"You're just going to leave him down there?" Dean asked. He didn't sound upset, just curious.

Cas pulled the clothing out of the duffel, setting things down on the table behind the sofa. He was amused by the way Benny had carefully lined up the jeans, T-shirt, boxers, and socks so they would form a tight roll. Either he had always been a very efficient packer or he had been nervous as hell and used packing as a way to distract himself. He even packed a toothbrush and toothpaste, deodorant, and safety razors, but they were all in individual baggies and those baggies were in a larger plastic bag, like he had thought everything through and packed more than once just to make sure.

"It's going to be another twenty minutes before he wakes up," Cas said, "and when he does, I want him to be alone."

"Dinner and a movie is going to take at least an hour and a half," Dean said.

"Longer if you keep standing there arguing with me," Cas said, prying open the bottom of the duffel and finding a 128gb micro SD card.

"I'm not arguing, I just...," Dean said, but then sighed and pulled out his cell phone.

Cas scooped up all the items and the duffel, then walked into the office, slipping the SD card into his computer's card reader and sitting down at the desk.

The first few files on the card were Benny's will and some instructions, pictures of his family and friends, and a file with all the usernames and passwords for his bank accounts and online services.

The next folder held three more folders. One was labeled Notes, the next Pictures, and the last one Video. Cas opened the Notes folder and found over two hundred files. The five random files he opened were snippets of dreams, little things that made Benny jump or shy away such as the smell of Barbasol, and detailed notes on therapist visits and tactics they tried for memory recall.

Cas backed out of the folder and browsed the Pictures folder. Some of the pictures were from the police reports, but most of them were taken with a different camera and were more intimate. Pictures Benny took himself.

There were four hundred and eighty-five photos, and though there were some pictures of Benny's bruises and scars in various stages of healing, most of them were pictures of things he had seen inside and outside his house. Cas couldn't figure out what they had in common, but he knew it would probably come to him if he looked through all of them. Maybe Dean would have more luck looking through them. Cas was more interested in the Video folder, so he went there next.

There were three hundred and twenty-three videos, none of them very long. The first video was dated two months after Benny had been dropped off in the park, and when Cas opened it, he could see Benny's bedroom, the unmade bed in the background, but the vantage point was from the closet.

Benny sat down on the floor in the closet, his chest and face visible in the shot along with the bed and curtains in the background. It was nighttime, and Benny had used the night vision setting on his cell phone to take the video. Even with night vision on, Cas could see the dark circles under Benny's eyes, the healing gash over his left cheekbone that had once been sutured, and the bitten lips -- a nervous habit of Benny's at the time.

_"I saw Dr. Baker t'day," Benny said._

The man was tired and worn out, not even attempting to hide his accent, and Cas wondered again why Benny tried to hide it at all. Had he always tried to hide it or was that something new since the kidnapping? Did he try to hide it because it was another piece of himself that he wanted to keep safe?

_Benny rubbed a hand over his face, then sighed and leaned against the wall. "She told me t'try this. Dr. Baker did," he said, then shrugged and gestured toward the camera. "I dunno why. Seems stupid. Jus' me whinin' 'bout somethin' I can't even remember."_

_He shook his head, looked at the camera for a moment, then shook his head again. He reached toward the camera, and the video ended._

"That the movie for the night?" Dean asked from the doorway.

Cas shook his head. "No, you'll get an upset tummy."

"Asshole," Dean said, smiling as he walked into the office and flopped down onto the chair in front of Cas' desk. "I'm serious. If you want us to watch this so we know better how to deal with him, you don't have to worry about my delicate sensibilities."

Cas wasn't actually worried about it. Dean had seen plenty over the years, and he didn't have a weak stomach. He was also a very good investigator, and Cas had no doubt Dean could help pick out things they needed.

Cas turned his monitor so Dean could see too, then opened the next video. The camera was in a slightly different position, but it was in the closet again, and Benny sat down, this time without a shirt on, and the damage to his chest was fully visible. His stitches had been removed, but the bruising was still fading away and the word carved into his chest was covered with a bandage, most likely because Benny didn't like looking at it.

"He's not trying to hide his accent," Dean said.

Cas grunted his acknowledgment. Dean was picking up on something, and Cas didn't want to ruin his train of thought. He watched as Benny scratched at the bandage on his chest.

"Serviette," Dean said, then turned to Cas. "Doesn't that mean napkin in French?"

Cas nodded. "Table napkin. You've probably seen it on napkin packages in the store."

Dean frowned. "Well, that's just sick. No wonder the guy tries to hide his accent now."

Cas paused the video. "Why?"

Dean shook his head. "Table napkin. Not slave or whore or any one of a million things his captor could've carved into his chest. It's like he heard the accent, thought it was cute or funny, then carved the first French word he could remember into Benny's chest."

Cas sighed. He had been looking for some deeper meaning, but Dean was probably right. "An insult. A permanent reminder of the futility of his situation and the sheer ridiculousness of what had happened to him."

"I mean, can you imagine doing that to somebody?" Dean asked. "He's gotta look at that for the rest of his life. All because his captor was amused by his accent. Something that had nothing to do with his kidnapping in the first place."

"I almost wish I didn't have to kill some of my victims," Cas said, ignoring the surprise on Dean's face. "Carving something this inane into my victim's chest, then sending them back out into the world like the thought of them being a threat to me is nothing but a joke." Cas huffed out a laugh. "It's a mindfuck."

"Either his captor was really smart or incredibly stupid," Dean said.

"Let's hope it's the latter," Cas said.

"He must be remembering more," Dean said, then gestured toward the monitor. "He wasn't trying to hide his accent back then, but now he is. Even if it's a subconscious thing, more of his time in that basement is coming to the surface."

"Or he's really tired and beat to hell in these videos," Cas said. "Accents you're trying to hide slip out when you're tired."

Dean shrugged. "Maybe," he said as Cas restarted the video.

_"Havin' trouble sleepin'," Benny said, rubbing at his eyes. "I keep seein' somebody. They're close, but I can't see their face. I can almost smell 'em, but I can't even tell the color o'their skin."_

_Benny shook his head and closed his eyes, leaning back against the wall, the fingers of his left hand sliding over the edges of the bandage on his chest._

_"Just when I think I can see somethin', I wake up," Benny said, voice cracking a bit. "I talked t'the police again today. They brought in some specialist. Droned on about methods and other bullshit. Kept tryin' t'act like he knew how I was feelin' 'bout this whole thing. He didn't. Worst part 'bout it was he assumed I didn't wanna remember. Said people hide from scary shit. Told him I wasn't hidin'. I wanna find the fucker. I got up and walked out when he called me on it. Fuckin' motherfucker."_

The next video was nothing but Benny shivering after waking up from another nightmare. He couldn't even talk, but he wanted to document it, and he kept the camera going for over seven minutes while he wiped at his eyes and tried to control his breathing.

_"Can't," Benny finally said before shutting the video off._

"He didn't think you'd find the SD card?" Dean asked, gesturing toward the screen.

"He knew," Cas said, nodding. "He hid it, but only because he wanted to feel like he was _trying_ to hide it from me. Handing it to me or leaving it in an envelope inside the duffel would've meant opening himself up too much to me."

"How do you know?" Dean asked.

"The date on the files show they were modified the day after he first talked to me," Cas said, bringing up the file information so Dean could see it. "But even if they weren't, he knew I was going to look through his house and his duffel, and he knew I'd need this information. The CON couldn't help him, and neither could the police or therapists, and I don't think he ever tried to give these to anybody else."

"I want to help him," Dean said, sitting forward. "I want to see the videos and anything else he left for you."

"I was joking about the upset tummy," Cas said, smirking.

"I know," Dean said, then stood up and scooted the chair across Cas' wood floor.

Cas didn't even bother yelling at him for it, and when Dean sat down again, he had a determined look on his face. Cas liked that look on Dean. It usually meant good things.

"You know those lines you told me about?" Dean asked, eyes on the monitor.

"Yes," Cas said, remembering their conversation about boundaries.

"I moved some of my lines so I don't have to cross them," Dean said.

"Okay," Cas said, as he opened the next video.


	4. Chapter 4

Two hours later they had finished off three pieces of pizza each and had seen seventeen of Benny's videos. Cas closed the program and stood up.

"It's time to go down there," he said. "We can finish the videos later."

Dean got up too and picked up the pizza box. "Should we take him a slice?" he asked with a smile.

Cas chuckled. "No, and we need to brush our teeth and wash our hands. He hasn't said anything yet about his captor smelling like food."

They met at the basement door after cleaning up, and Cas took a moment to stop Dean. Dean frowned at him, ready to give him a hard time for coddling him.

"Remember what he said in the videos and try to recreate it," Cas said, then opened the door.

Dean's footsteps were close behind, and when Cas turned the basement lights on, he was pleased to see that Benny wasn't on the bed. He kept a hand on the railing in case Benny was under the stairs and had somehow gotten his hands free. Cas didn't need a fall down the stairs if Benny reached through and tripped him.

His sneakers crunched over the sand and quarter minus, and he stepped over some of the tools on the floor that had been strewn about when Benny had tried to find a weapon. Cas' serrated knife was missing from the tools on the floor, and he reached back to tap Dean on the leg, letting him know to be extra careful.

Ragged breathing came from under the stairs. It was muffled, but Cas easily located him. The drops of blood on the floor led him right to Benny, who was huddled in the corner, pressing himself in as tight as he could, ankles still bound, hands behind his back, but Cas didn't assume Benny was still bound at the wrists.

The blindfold was off, Benny's face was turned to the wall, shoulders hunched up around his neck as he shivered. There was some dried blood smeared on his right hip.

Cas crouched beside Benny's right side, his left hand hovering just over Benny's right hip in case Benny had managed to cut through the ropes and was ready to lash out. He raised his right hand and gently ran a finger over Benny's cheek, then down his jaw and neck.

Benny whimpered, trying to push himself deeper into the corner, but he didn't lash out, so Cas followed the curve of Benny's right arm, his wrist, and cupped Benny's hand. Benny let go of the knife as Cas gently pulled.

"Good little bitch," Cas whispered as he scraped the flat edge of the serrated knife over the scars on Benny's right upper arm. "Looks so easy on TV, doesn't it?"

Benny sniffled, nodding against the cement wall.

"It's much harder when you're a pathetic momma's boy who can't stop crying long enough to cut himself free," Cas said, voice still soft, barely above a whisper. "So pathetic you cut your own skin more than you did the ropes."

"I-I changed my mind," Benny said, blurting it out quickly and moving against the wall like he could climb inside if he just tried hard enough. "I can't do this! I changed my mind!"

Cas stood up and grabbed a handful of Benny's hair, yanking him toward the bed. Benny cried out, and when he tried to follow, he found that he couldn't because his ankles were still tied. Cas took hold of Benny's right elbow and pulled him onto the bed, Benny's arm twisting back painfully and eliciting another yelp from the man. Benny choked on his own fear as Cas straddled his legs and pushed his face against the soiled mattress.

"Do you have any idea," Cas yelled, shaking Benny by the neck, "how many other people I'm going to hurt because you're so fucking pathetic?! Do you?!"

Benny started to softly cry, and Cas took advantage of Benny's attempts to control his own emotions, leaning over and grabbing the gag from the floor where it had fallen and strapping it on, the mouthpiece covering Benny's mouth and nose. Benny panicked, started to thrash about, but Cas fastened it and cinched it tight before climbing off Benny and heading for the stairs, where Dean was waiting.

Cas leaned in, his lips brushing Dean's left ear as he whispered, "The mask forces him to breathe slowly, and if he doesn't, he'll pass out, but he'll be okay even if he loses consciousness."

He and Dean waited while Benny fought with the regulator. It took him several tries, but he managed to do it, breathing in and out slowly and forcing himself to remain calm. His skin was covered in a sheen of sweat, and Cas could smell the acidic fear in the room. Even though Benny was lying as still as possible, the muscles in his arms and legs continued to twitch with irritation. It was involuntary, of course, but it meant they were already getting to him.

Dean tapped Cas on the shoulder, and when Cas turned to him, Dean gestured to the cart that had been overturned on the floor. Dean raised his right eyebrow, asking for permission, and Cas nodded, his dick partially hard just from throwing Benny around, but even more so as he watched Dean run his fingers over the tools on the floor.

Benny's eyes were squeezed shut, and he might have heard Dean coming, but he couldn't see what was in Dean's hand. Cas leaned against the stairs, wondering if it was a bad idea to install cameras down in the basement. Whatever Dean was going to do to Benny, Cas would be able to use it for jerk-off material for years.

The tool Dean chose was a socket wrench, and Cas frowned, having no idea what Dean was going to do with it. Cas had used it a number of times, most notably on a man who had killed his wife and children in his garage, using a power drill and several other tools on them after he discovered his wife was having an affair and the kids knew about it. Cas didn't think Dean was going to use it in the same way Cas had.

Dean slowly knelt down between Benny's legs, and Benny held his breath for a moment, body tensing, but he stayed on his stomach, legs spread, and soon the click and puff of the regulator was the only sound in the room.

Cas figured Dean was going to shove it up Benny's ass when Dean reached out, but instead he rested the socket on Benny's lower back. Benny flinched, a small whimper the only sound besides the regulator. Dean let him settle, then very slowly ran the socket over Benny's back, moving the socket counter-clockwise and making it click as it rolled over his skin.

Benny's clenched his hands into fists, and he was visibly forcing himself to stay calm, taking regular breaths so he wouldn't pass out, but there was no doubt in Cas' mind that Benny was terrified of what Dean was going to do to him.

_"Sometimes he was quiet. So fuckin' quiet. Wouldn't hurt me. Not right away. He'd just... just sit there. Barely-there touches."_

Dean was recreating the scene for him, and Cas' chest swelled with pride. Benny let out a soft sob as Dean ran the socket over Benny's upper back, over the large scar on his right scapula. It was almost hypnotic. The clicking a regular sound, and Cas could almost feel the vibration of the clicks on his own skin, knew exactly what it would feel like if Dean had been doing it to him instead of the terrified man on the bed.

_"Drove me fuckin' crazy, and I just wanted it to stop. I just... I wanted him to do something. No, I don't... I don't mean I wanted him to hurt me, but it would'a been better than that. Than the quiet and the anticipation. I never knew what was coming next. But it was bad. I always knew it would be bad."_

Dean stopped in the middle of Benny's back, and Benny fucking lost it. Dean pulled back as Benny struggled, straining to get enough air as he tried to get away, wriggling over the bed but not getting anywhere. The regulator clicked, and the sounds of Benny dragging in as much air as he could get only made Cas harder. The struggling, grunts, and whimpers exciting him more.

_"It was always so much worse. So fuckin' bad when he was quiet. The calm before the storm."_

Benny did his best to get his breathing back under control, but it was no use. Anticipating what Dean was going to do to him next was the only thing he could focus on, and his body jerked, chest puffing out as his lungs screamed for oxygen. Finally Benny's body went limp as he passed out, and Dean stood up, dropping the socket wrench on the floor and turning to Cas.

"He okay?" Dean asked.

Cas nodded. "Yeah. Now that he's out, his breathing will regulate. He'll be fine. Come upstairs with me."

Dean followed close behind, and as they made it to the door at the top of the stairs, he asked, "Did I do okay?"

Cas turned around and smiled. "That was perfect," he said softly.

Dean nodded, looking down and slightly uncomfortable with the praise even though he still wanted it. Craved it. He followed Cas into the kitchen.

"We need to watch more videos," Cas said. "And I need to do some online shopping. The first interaction went well. Better than I expected."

Cas pretended not to notice the shy smile tugging at the corners of Dean's lips.

"Give this to the delivery person," Cas said as he handed Dean two one hundred-dollar bills. "I'm going to make sure he doesn't do anything to get anyone's attention."

Dean nodded and took the money, his shoulders tense and the tight line of his lips telling Cas he still wasn't all that happy with what they were doing even though he already participated in the events.

Cas walked down the stairs, letting his shoes make more noise than usual just to let Benny know he was coming, to give him a chance to control his breathing so he didn't startle and pass out with the lack of oxygen. The even sounds of air passing through the regulator meant Benny had gotten the hang of it, but what Cas planned on doing would most likely fuck that up.

Benny hadn't tried to move. He was in the same position they left him in with his hands behind his back, dried lines of blood on his fingers, hands, and his lower back. The cuts were shallow, and Cas hadn't bothered to tend to them.

Cas settled on Benny's legs again, and Benny tried to take a deeper breath, struggling for a few seconds before remembering he couldn't. Once he calmed again, Cas pulled a switchblade from his pocket and flicked it open. The sound had Benny flinching and trying yet again to control his breathing, the soft click and hush of the regulator something Cas liked hearing and always made him want to yawn for some reason. He closed his eyes for a moment and enjoyed the sound, then looked down at Benny.

Benny's back was a strange mix of ornate, beautiful scars and contrasting long slashes. Tiny cuts placed in particular spots along with deeper cuts that were done in anger.

_"too soft, too hard... too soft, too hard"_

Benny had repeated it over and over after one of his nightmares. He could have been describing the sexual aspect of his captivity, but Cas didn't think that was the case. The scars on Benny's body were easily separated into two categories, and if Cas didn't know better, he would have said it was done by two different individuals; one full of rage and hate, the other calm, collected, and done by someone who thought about each and every move they made.

Cas ran the switchblade over a raised scar on Benny's right upper back, near the shoulder blade, then slowly pushed, dragging the knife down a previous scar that was even and controlled.

Benny's reaction was not what Cas was expecting. His body flinched hard, and he twisted, rearing back, and Cas barely avoided stabbing Benny deeply with the knife. Benny growled and yelled, the mask muffling the sound, and as Benny tried to suck in a breath, he was forced to take in a small amount at a slow pace, and it was obvious Benny had been too scared to remember. He fought it hard, but finally passed out.

Suddenly Dean was pulling Cas off Benny, and he unbuckled the mask before throwing it across the room.

"You trying to fuckin' kill him?!" Dean yelled.

"He passed out," Cas said as he stood up, and before Dean could say anything else, Cas grabbed him by the wrist and headed for the stairs.

"He's bleeding," Dean said, trying to pull away.

"It'll stop in under two minutes," Cas said as they walked into the kitchen. "In the meantime, we have something to discuss."

Dean tried to pull away again, but Cas had a good grip on him, and he tossed the switchblade into the sink before he practically dragged Dean into the living room room.

"Fuck," Dean breathed as he stumbled along behind Cas.

Cas shoved Dean against the sofa table, a couple of books dropping onto the floor as the wood scraped over the hardwood floor. "My goal is _not_ to kill him," he said, getting in Dean's face, "but even if it was, the only reason I let you do this with me was because you said you were ready."

"I am," Dean said, shoulders tense and that stubborn look in his eyes.

"You proved otherwise just now down in the basement," Cas said, then shook his head. "You said you moved your lines, but unless you're ready to commit to it, you're only going to slow down his progress and get in my way," Cas said.

"I moved them," Dean said, nearly spitting out the words. "I'm ready for this."

Cas opened his mouth, ready to argue, but then he saw the tears welling up in Dean's eyes. Dean was fighting it, but there was no mistaking that Dean was on the verge of losing control over his emotions. It was another new thing Dean did that Cas couldn't understand, and he had no idea how to deal with it. Dean never used to cry at the drop of a hat before. Before Ruslan.

"Being ready for it doesn't mean you have to do it," Cas said.

Dean's face screwed up in confusion. "What?"

"Okay, you're ready," Cas said, shrugging. "You've moved your boundaries and want to do this. I believe you. But if you don't feel like doing it right now, that's okay too."

"You never wanted me to help," Dean said, looking down as his voice became softer. His breath caught in his chest, and his bottom lip quivered just a bit, a couple tears streaming down his cheeks. "Fuck. Fuck this. If I fuckin' go down there right now he's gonna hear me fuckin' sniffling."

Something inside Cas burned with arousal as he imagined taking Dean downstairs. Sniffling with red-rimmed eyes and breaths catching as Benny watched. Benny would know it was Cas that had made Dean cry. Would know that Dean was his.

A part of Cas wanted that so badly he could taste it. Another part of him wanted to fix whatever the fuck was making Dean cry, but he didn't know how to fix it, because he wasn't even sure why Dean was crying in the first place, and that frustrated him all the more. He _should_ know. He _would_ know if he was a normal fucking human being. He would know exactly what to say, and Dean would wipe away the tears. Everything would be fine again, if only Cas was a normal human.

"It's more proof you have to use against me," Dean mumbled. "Proof I'm not a Cleaner and shouldn't even try, but you don't have to rub it in."

"If your heart takes over, you _really_ let it take over," Cas said, and even as the words came out of his mouth, he knew it wasn't the right thing to say. Dean shoved him out of the way and headed for the hallway, but Cas followed him.

"What do you want?" Dean yelled as he stopped in the hallway, spinning around to face Cas.

"I want you to talk with your dad," Cas said.

Dean blinked at him for a moment, then huffed, reaching up to wipe some tears from his face. "What, right now?"

"Not right now," Cas said, shaking his head, "but soon. I've mentioned it several times, but I think you shouldn't put it off anymore. You two share the same drive and a lot of the same morals, but you also know when to trust your instincts, and as long as you can keep your heart under control, your instincts are good, and you're a lot smarter than you give yourself credit for. Your dad went through the same thing you're going through."

"How do you know?" Dean asked, and Cas suspected that was hope in his eyes. Just a little bit of it.

"I saw the way he deferred to your mother after Ruslan took you," Cas said, a small twinge in his chest as he watched Dean flinch at the mention of his kidnapper. "It wasn't because he liked the situation, and in fact if he could've incinerated Ruslan with just a look, he would've done it. Instead he controlled himself, let your mother do what she does best, and he helped her because he knows when to push and when to ignore his heart in favor of his instincts."

Dean leaned back against the wall. "Yeah, well, my instincts just told me you were about to kill him, so I-"

"No they didn't," Cas said, shaking his head. "You got scared, and for a split second you ignored the facts. I know what I'm doing. My goal is to help that guy find his captor so I can play with him, and I'm going to have to traumatize Benny even more to do that. That wasn't instinct or intelligence making you ignore those facts, it was your heart. Think back and tell me what your instinct was saying just before you grabbed my arm."

Dean sighed, crossing his arms over his chest. With his red-rimmed eyes, he didn't seem the least bit intimidating, even with the arms crossed over his chest.

"Fine," Dean said, enough attitude in his demeanor to show he really wasn't happy about admitting it, "my instinct told me you still had it under control even though Benny was freaking the fuck out."

"Good," Cas said, nodding, "now just trust those instincts and ignore your heart more often and this will work."

"I can't do th-"

"No, you'll never be able to ignore it completely," Cas said, shrugging. "Your father can't either, no matter how tough he thinks he is or what most people see in him. You're not a psychopathic killer, and if your parents are anything to go by, that's a good thing."

"Can I go take a piss now?" Dean asked, not so much pissy as he was ready to move on. A tiredness in his eyes and the set of his shoulders, the way he was standing.

"Yes."

Dean stalked away, feet heavy on the wood floor. Cas wasn't sure why he had the feeling Dean had won the argument, but he did, and it didn't really make sense.


	5. Chapter 5

_"Had a fuckin' wet dream," Benny said, face buried in his hands. "He was playin' with me. Soft. Gentle. Drivin' me crazy."_

_Benny sniffled, then shifted on the floor, leaning his head back against the wall, hands still covering his face._

_"I come every fuckin' time," he whispered, then let his hands fall to his sides as he looked into the camera. "It's easier when he just hurts me. Doesn't try t'make me feel good. I'm a sick fuck for enjoyin' anything he does when it's soft."_

The video stopped and Dean turned to Cas. "What if there was more than one kidnapper?" he asked.

Cas shrugged. "Possible. But why wouldn't he say it was two different guys holding him?" He knew there was a strong possibility there were two kidnappers, but talking it out with Dean would fill in the missing parts. They could probably figure it out together instead of Cas just assuming.

"Every police report we've read mentioned one killer," Dean said, tapping the manila folder on the desk. It was full of reports and diagrams they'd already been over multiple times. "Benny blocked out the face of his captor and anything else that would identify him, so who's to say he hasn't convinced himself the police are right and there's only one killer?"

"Trauma victims often don't remember things correctly," Cas said with a nod. "So traumatized that their mind comes up with explanations that don't hurt as much."

"He's tried to find the guy himself," Dean said, "and even though he hasn't really gotten anywhere with it, don't you think he's watched these videos? Even if he forgot he said that, it's right there for him to watch over and over again."

"But why would he believe something he said after a nightmare and in the middle of the night when he's scared out of his mind?" Cas asked. "He has to know his nightmares, lack of sleep, and mental state couldn't be relied upon."

"Okay, so what do you want to do?" Dean asked.

"Something that means I have to trust you to think before you act," Cas said, then watched Dean closely for the reaction to his words.

Dean sat forward, an intensity in his eyes that Cas couldn't quite place. "Look, I know I fucked up. I don't even know why you haven't kicked me outta the house yet after what I did with Benny and a few other instances I'll not mention in case you get any urges to do something to me."

"What do you mean?" Cas asked, even though he had a sneaking suspicion Dean had seen something in him that Cas thought he had been hiding well.

Dean snorted, a small grin tugging at the corners of his mouth. "You get this look in your eyes. I'm pretty sure it's because you wanna do something to me, and I see you holding back. So I'm not going to mention things at the moment that I think might make you get that look in your eyes."

Damn. "Okay, go on."

"All right, I know I fucked up," Dean said, "but it's sinking in. That shit I pulled down in the basement could've gotten Benny killed and you hurt. I _do_ trust you. And I know it sounds like a really shitty thing to ask, but I'd like one more chance."

"If you fuck it up again," Cas said, "you're really not going to like the consequences."

"I don't doubt that," Dean said, wincing.

"Some of the things Benny has said in the videos, about the moaning and crying, lead me to believe there was someone else being held there for a while," Cas said. "Someone who was tortured right alongside Benny."

The color drained from Dean's face so fast that Cas' cock twitched. It was beautiful, and Cas savored it. Dean's eyes were wide and more than a little scared, so Cas assumed he didn't need to spell it out. Cas had no qualms about tying Dean up down there with Benny and hurting both of them in order to recreate Benny's experiences, and Dean knew it.

"I can do this, Cas," Dean said, and his voice was confident even if he was scared.

Benny had fallen asleep for a while. It was an exhausted sleep, and Cas checked on him to make sure he wasn't trying to free himself. Whatever had been done to him in the killer's basement had really screwed with his head, and Benny was too terrified to try and work his way out of the ties holding his wrists. Cas had no doubt Benny could have worked with the knife longer and figured out how to cut it away from his wrists, but Benny had frozen and stayed that way even when he was alone.

Cas ran a hand over his clean-shaven chin as he walked down the stairs, uncomfortable with not only the way the Barbasol left his skin feeling, but also the smell. He was used to his own products with a much milder scent.

Dean ran his fingers over Cas' jaw and gave him a nod, a small smile. "Don't switch to this brand. I like the other stuff."

Cas grunted, then headed down the stairs. Benny heard them coming, this time both Cas and Dean making noise on the stairs, and Benny whimpered as he tried to crawl away. He pressed his back up against the wall and ducked his chin, as if not looking at them would save him.

Cas had taken a chance on something he saw in the pictures Benny had taken in a local pharmacy and had sprayed some cheap Aspen cologne on a bandanna. As he slipped it over Benny's eyes and tied it, Benny took a whiff, then held his breath, his body tensing even more. Cas grabbed him by the hair again and tossed him toward the mattress.

Benny flopped onto the floor belly first, grunting with the impact, but Cas hauled him onto the mattress and put his knee at the small of Benny's back, leaning on him until Benny cried out. He pulled out his switchblade again and opened it before slashing Benny quickly across the back of his left arm.

"No!" Benny yelled, pulling away from the pain, then twisting and crying out again as Cas did the same to his shoulder. They were shallow cuts. Just enough to scare Benny, give him some pain, and the cuts would only bleed a little.

Cas put his left hand down on Benny's back, to the left of his spine, then flicked the blade back and forth over Benny's arm, teasing and not cutting. Careless gestures that surprised Benny with every flick.

Dean kneeled down on the floor by Benny's head and gently ran his fingers through Benny's hair. Cas felt it the moment Benny realized what was going on.

"No! Please, no! No," Benny sobbed, his whole body shivering as he pushed his face against the mattress and cried.

Dean shushed him, then cupped his face and gently held him, his thumbs rubbing over the skin of Benny's temples. A vulnerable and sensitive place that reminded Benny how quickly things could go very wrong. The wounds on Benny's arm and shoulder were shallow enough that they only dribbled a little blood, and as Cas shifted down, straddling Benny's legs and checking that the rope was tight, Dean leaned down and put his lips to Benny's left ear.

"We're going to take turns," he whispered.

Cas spread Benny's ass cheeks, but the man didn't flinch from him. All his attention was focused on Dean.

"Not fuckin' real," Benny said, his words slurred with fear. "No. You're not fuckin' real. Not real. You're n-not, you're not real."

Cas pulled a bottle of lube and a condom out of his pocket before rolling it on and slicking himself up. Benny didn't even move when Cas used his index finger to push some lube inside his hole.

"Ow, fuck," Benny whined as Cas shoved his cock in, the tight heat clamping around Cas' cock so good he didn't even try to hold back, just started fucking him hard.

Dean glanced at Benny's ass, then looked again as Cas fucked him. Watching Cas' cock thrust in and out. Cas wondered what Dean was thinking. How he was feeling about it now that he was watching it play out in front of him. And then he wondered why he was thinking about it at all. They had already discussed it. Dean was in the basement of his own free will. He didn't have to watch. He glanced up at Cas, looking him in the eye for a moment before focusing on Benny again. Cas didn't think he saw anger or hurt, but he couldn't be sure. Dean didn't give him any tells, and Cas sucked at reading facial expressions.

Benny didn't fight it. He was too concerned with the person holding his face, caressing him, and shushing him. It was as if he couldn't have cared less that Cas was fucking him.

It was a little disappointing for Cas to be completely ignored, but it was still a warm hole, and after being hard so many times since Benny had gotten to the house, it didn't take long for Cas to come, fucking deep inside, Benny's shoulders tensing more only after Cas came. As Cas pulled out, Benny started breathing heavier.

"Gonna make you feel so good," Dean whispered as he let go of Benny's face and crawled around, kneeling next to Cas. "My turn now."

Benny was too scared to realize they hadn't switched places, and as soon as Cas pushed his lubed fingers in, Benny yelled. Nothing but nonsensical begging and pleading came from him, but it was obvious Cas fucking him had meant nothing compared to what he thought Dean was going to do to him.

Cas moved slowly, pushing deep inside before pulling out, then running his fingers around Benny's hole and pushing back in, all roughness gone from his treatment of Benny. He found Benny's prostate and started a gentle massage, using his left hand and gesturing to the ropes holding Benny's wrists together.

Dean got the message and started untying the ropes while Benny's hips thrust forward and back, his arousal building as Cas played with him. When his hands were freed, Benny let them fall to his sides. He didn't try to get up or hurt either of them. He just stayed where he was.

Cas rubbed harder as Benny clenched around him, and he used his thumb on Benny's taint, making the man shudder, breath catching in his chest. Soon Benny was humping the mattress, and just before he came, he whispered "sick fuck" and shot his load onto the bed.

"Feels so good, doesn't it?" Dean whispered, running his fingers through Benny's hair, gently scratching his scalp. "Do you want me to fuck you now?"

Benny shook his head. "Please, no. Please."

"You don't want me inside you?" Dean asked, a wounded quality to his voice. "You don't want me?"

"Fuck," Benny sobbed, hands clenching at his sides.

"Say you want it," Dean said, but it wasn't anything more than a gentle request. Almost pleading. "C'mon. Say it. Tell me."

Benny let out another sob, then his body relaxed. Cas knew it was because Benny had given in, not that he suddenly felt comfortable or wasn't scared anymore. Benny knew the character Dean was playing would win, and there was nothing he could do to save himself.

"I wanna eat your pussy," Benny whispered.

Dean looked up at Cas, surprise written all over his face as more pieces of the puzzle fell into place.

"Say it nicely," Dean said, voice soft, recovering well from the new revelation.

"Please," Benny begged. "Please lemme eat your pussy. I'll do it just like y'like it. Please."

Dean hummed, then shook his head. "Nope. Not good enough."

Benny's entire body tensed back up again, and a keening started up that got louder the more terrified Benny became. "No! Please don't! N-no!"

Dean looked to Cas again, holding his hands up in a 'what do I do now?!' gesture.

"Don't put that thing in me! Please!" Benny cried out, arms still at his sides even though he could have used them to try and defend himself. "I don't like it! Please!"

Dean shushed Benny, then put his lips close to Benny's right ear. "I'm not in the mood right now," he said softly, "but I'm going to be back in a little while, and then I'll have some fun."

It was their best option. They could leave him down in the basement and search for more clues in the videos and his hospital records. They already reviewed all the records, but that was when they thought there was only one kidnapper. When they hadn't known there was a female kidnapper too.

Dean and Cas got up, leaving Benny crying and curling up into a ball on the bed, covering his face and shivering. It was obvious he was more terrified of his female captor than he ever was of the male, and he knew what would be coming back for him later even if Cas and Dean didn't yet.

"So we can't hire some random chick to help out with this," Dean said as they walked into the office.

"No," Cas said as he sat down at his desk and pulled up the next video while Dean spread the medical reports out in front of them on the desk, then sat down across from Cas.

"I don't have a pussy for him to eat out," Dean said, smirking.

"I don't think we'll need it," Cas said, shaking his head as he opened up the folder on the SD card and found the videos. "He was more terrified of what she was going to do. Whatever she put inside him. We need more information."

The next three videos they watched were a repeat of past performances, and they mostly paid attention to the medical reports and pictures, searching for anything useful.

"There wasn't even much damage done to his asshole," Dean said, pushing a picture toward Cas. "Or his mouth, for that matter."

The next video started and both men stopped what they were doing when they heard the first thing Benny said.

_"I can still feel it," he said, hands over his face. "Can feel it inside me sometimes. Full. Too full."_

_He shook his head, leaving one hand over his face, the other reaching inside his boxers as he lifted his ass off the floor, using the door jamb to support his back._

_"This is fuckin' stupid," Benny said, then let out a manic sort of laugh. "Keep checkin' my own fuckin' asshole because I think one o'these times I'm gonna reach back there and I'm gonna feel metal."_

_Benny hissed, his hips bucking forward, then he rocked back onto his own hand._

_"If I could sit around all day with my fingers up my ass, I would," Benny said, then took a few shuddering breaths. "I can feel it. Can feel the... Feel the... Fuck!"_

_Benny bucked hard, his cock jerking inside his boxers, and once Benny was done, coming down from his climax, he started to softly cry._

_"I didn't like it," Benny said. "Don't know why I fuckin' come every goddamn time!"_

The video stopped and the next one started. Another video where Benny repeated some of his earlier statements, talking about a faceless man who was familiar, and that he could almost see him, but yet he couldn't. Cas hit pause before the next video started.

"Strap-on?" Dean asked.

Cas shrugged. "It's a possibility, but why would he hate it so much?"

"He's straight," Dean said as if it was painfully obvious.

"It seems like more than that," Cas said, shaking his head. "And he said metal. A metal strap-on sounds a little hard-core for a kidnapping duo of rapist-slash-murderers."

"The fact that he's straight sounds like a good enough reason to me," Dean said, letting out a huff of laughter. "Dude never had anything in his ass before this. Suddenly he's got his kidnapper fucking him whenever the sick fuck wants, and then this chick kidnapper uses a hard, cold metal strap-on to make him come? Sounds fucked up to me."

"He didn't seem to care when I fucked him," Cas said, frowning as he tried to think, tried to piece it together. "He also was only mildly disturbed when I made him come with my fingers in his ass. I think it's something more. Something different. He may be straight, but I don't think he has strong objections to it simply based on the gender of the individual or the act itself."

"He knows I'm living with you, right?" Dean asked.

Cas nodded. "When we talked everything over, I told him you and I were in a relationship. He didn't miss a beat or flinch."

"Okay," Dean drawled, "but maybe he's just being polite or he's scared to say anything in front of a gay dude who can also kill him without thinking twice about it."

Cas shook his head again. "No, I don't think so. Homophobic individuals look away or hunch their shoulders even if they don't say anything. In these videos he's never said anything homophobic, and that would be the time his true feelings and worries would come out. Every time he says something about the rapes, his anger and pain are associated with the violation itself, not the gender of his rapist or the act. Other than 'sick fuck' he hasn't said anything derogatory."

"The way he said it, I kinda think he was directing it toward himself," Dean said softly.

Cas leaned back in the chair and nodded. "I think you're right, but we can't be sure yet."

"Okay, any suggestions on what she used on him?" Dean asked.

"It has to be something that didn't do a lot of damage," Cas said. "Maybe something irritating. Maybe she used figging on him, then fucked him with a metal dildo strap-on."

"I don't think I wanna know what figging is," Dean said, wincing.

Cas chuckled. "You'll get to experience it one of these days. A ginger root shoved up your ass."

Dean blinked at him. "Huh?"

"Ginger burns," Cas said, not allowing himself to smile as Dean squirmed. "Well, it doesn't burn in that it does damage, but it burns much the same way spicy food makes your mouth burn."

"Ow," Dean said, upper lip curling.

"It can be fun," Cas said. "It all depends on who you do it with and how that person uses it. It can be torture or it can be one of the best things you've ever felt. Your hole gets very sensitive, and if someone fucks you after you've had it up your ass, the sensation is almost overwhelming."

"I guess he could've gotten scared it was really burning his asshole," Dean said, though he didn't sound convinced. "If it can be used as torture and she didn't tell him otherwise, maybe he just assumed it was doing damage."

"He was there long enough he should've figured it out," Cas said, shaking his head. "After it was taken out and the burning had worn off, he would've figured it out."

"So we have to look for something else," Dean said.

Cas nodded and started the next video.


	6. Chapter 6

It had been a long day, and after giving Benny a ham sandwich with some water, Cas called it a night. They left him handcuffed to an eye hook near the bed, naked and blindfolded, though Cas figured the blindfold would not stay on very long.

They both took showers, Dean going first while Cas cleaned up the kitchen and put the sandwich fixings away. Cas took his time in the shower, letting the hot water relax his muscles before he dried himself off and crawled into bed.

Dean snuggled up to him, and Cas let him. It was getting easier, and the more Cas allowed it, the more Dean turned into an octopus at night. It was difficult to untangle himself when he was ready to get up and Dean was still asleep most nights, but the way Dean sighed and slept without nightmares when he did it meant a good night's rest for Cas, so it was all logistics, really. It was when Dean distanced himself and stayed on his side of the bed, waking with nightmares and stalking around the house that it was difficult.

"Hey, Cas?"

"Yes, Dean."

"You can stop treating me like a wounded pet now," Dean said softly.

Cas wasn't sure how to respond to that. It was true. Ever since Ruslan had taken Dean, Cas had treated him with kid gloves. Of course, Cas was sure Mary would kill him if he didn't coddle Dean after what happened to him, but it was more than that.

Dean had always been confident. Even when he was scared or unsure about something, he still had a core of confidence that bled into everything he did, and after Ruslan, Dean had lost that. Cas missed it, and every time he even thought about doing something to Dean or even fucking him, he couldn't get over the way the mischief and flirtatiousness in Dean's eyes was gone.

It had only been three weeks, and Cas knew enough about trauma victims to know that Dean could get it back. He was recovering, and he needed time, but Cas wanted that part back. It was so much of Dean's personality that Cas didn't even realize it until it wasn't there anymore.

Looking at Dean hurt sometimes, because he could see the hesitation. That last bit of innocence or whatever it was Dean had retained throughout his life had been taken by Ruslan, and Cas didn't know how to get it back.

"Cas?"

He hadn't hurt Dean since Ruslan. Hadn't fucked him. Hadn't done anything when Dean talked back to him just days after Cas had brought him home. He hadn't stopped him when Dean refused a case Cas wanted to take. He hadn't even done anything when Dean left wet towels on the floor in the bathroom. Hadn't really punished Dean for pulling him off Benny in the basement.

He _knew_ he was treating Dean differently, and he hated it. He couldn't even blame it all on Mary's advice, which made everything even worse.

"When you stop acting like a wounded pet, I'll stop treating you like one," Cas said.

It was cold and harsh and even as he said it, Cas wondered if maybe it was too much for someone who had been through what Dean had been through. Wondered if it was the wrong thing to say.

"It changed you too, ya know," Dean said, barely a whisper.

"What changed me?" Cas asked.

"Ruslan taking me," Dean said.

"Just because I'm treating you differently doesn't mean I've changed," Cas said, something niggling in the back of his mind, something that said maybe Dean was right. Had he let the situation change him? Or was it a simple case of Cas walking on eggshells around his traumatized Handler and lover?

As Dean snuggled closer, Cas closed his eyes, remembering all the times Dean had tried to get close, but Cas wouldn't let him. Those times Dean had touched, and Cas had nearly broken Dean's wrist. The times other Handlers had pushed too far, and they suffered the consequences.

"So you still get horny, but you just, what, take care of it yourself?" Dean asked.

"What does that have to do with anything?" Cas asked, more irritated than he probably should have been.

Dean let out a huff of laughter. "We haven't fucked since Ruslan."

"I've been giving you time to heal," Cas said.

It was partly true. He didn't think Dean would enjoy getting fucked in the ass so soon after having stitches removed. Not only had the stitches broken the skin, there was the pressure on the stitches from being full and not having access to the toilet.

"So it's not because of what you saw the day you came to get me away from Ruslan?" Dean asked.

Cas could hear the vulnerability in Dean's voice, and he wanted to burn it away. Ruslan had put it there, and it didn't belong in Dean. Never in Dean.

"You're worried I'm no longer sexually attracted to you because I pulled stitches from your asshole and watched you shit the bed?" Cas asked. He could have softened the words or said it in such a way as to not be so harsh, but it would have only made Dean feel even more off-kilter.

"Well, yeah," Dean said. "I wasn't at my most attractive that day."

"I told you I didn't care about that," Cas said, and he meant it. It hadn't changed his view of Dean at all. In fact, if anything, he was proud of Dean for remaining as calm as he had through such a humiliating and terrifying experience.

"So there's another reason you're not fucking me," Dean said.

Cas sighed. "I'm letting you heal, and I'm also very tired. It was a long day, and I need some sleep so I can-"

"Fuck Benny?" Dean interrupted.

Jealousy again. Cas didn't really understand it, but he knew most people had jealousy issues. He wasn't sure how to get Dean to see there was no correlation between him not fucking Dean and fucking Benny.

"I've told you-"

"I know, I know," Dean said, the words clipped. "I've got my own box. Benny has his box. But I'm not getting fucked in my box. Hell, I haven't even gotten handjobs in my box."

"If you want something, ask for it," Cas said, tired of the conversation, of the day, and of trying to navigate human emotions.

"I want you to stop treating me with kid gloves," Dean said, voice getting a little louder. "I want you to get annoyed at me and tell me no when I drag you out to the supermarket for groceries you could damn well order online and have delivered. I want you to bend me over the couch and fuck me. I want you to act like I never got taken by Ruslan, because every time you don't act like yourself, I remember I'm damaged goods. I remember what that fucker did to me."

Cas pushed Dean off him and sat up. "I was doing this for you," he said as he slid off the bed and pulled a pair of jeans on. "If you don't like the way I'm treating you, maybe you'd be better off going back home."

Dean got out of bed, yanking the chain on the nightstand table light so hard the lamp wobbled for a moment before settling. "If that's what you want, then I'll get out."

"I didn't say that's what I want," Cas said, frustrated and so very confused. "If you want me to fuck you, I'll fuck you."

Dean shook his head. "I don't need a pity fuck."

Cas sighed and stepped back as Dean rummaged through the drawer he kept some of his clothes in. He watched silently as Dean pulled some sweatpants on, then grabbed his wallet and keys from the dresser.

He started to walk out of the room, then stopped and turned around, eyes a little watery. "I'm not fucking broken," he said through clenched teeth before he turned around and stalked out of the house, barefooted and pissed.

Cas heard the Impala start up, and the growl of the motor faded as he drove away. For a moment, Cas felt a heavy weight lift from his shoulders. Dean had been a constant in his home for weeks, and it felt as though he was Dean's caretaker.

Dean had been moody and at times very quiet. He had been picky about his food in a way he never had been before. He had been hard to deal with, and other than growing up with an annoying older brother, Cas had never dealt with a pain-in-the-ass house guest. Even the relationships he had previously never made it to the point where they lived together.

Cas checked the clock and figured he would be unable to get back to sleep anyway, so at quarter to midnight he got fully dressed again and headed down to the basement. It would be good to keep Benny awake for as long as possible anyway.

Benny was sobbing. Heaving breaths and hiccupping in between gulps of air, whimpering as he tried to calm himself down. Tried to regulate his breathing.

"I thought you liked that," Cas whispered in Benny's left ear as he spread himself out over Benny's body and ran the tips of his fingers over Benny's shoulder.

"Please," Benny said, shoulders shaking as he cried.

"Please what?" Cas asked, his cock still hard and deep inside Benny even though he had come twice in the condom.

Benny gasped, his body going rigid when before he had been shaky and almost boneless beneath Cas. "I c-can't hear the planes," he blurted.

Cas would have to bring down his cell phone and play a track for Benny later. He knew he could find the sound of a plane flying overhead. It might help.

"What else?" Cas asked, hoping to get Benny's brain going, spitting out more information.

"No," Benny sobbed into the mattress.

"Yes, you can tell me," Cas said, nuzzling the back of Benny's head. "C'mon, just tell me."

"I d-don't wanna do it," Benny whispered.

"If you tell me, I'll make sure you don't get a visit from Daddy tonight," Cas said, working on a hunch.

Benny calmed just a bit, but he didn't say anything. Cas just waited him out, hoping it was working.

"I'll tell Daddy you made me happy today," Cas said.

"Video eighty-seven," Benny mumbled into the mattress.

It was only the second break in character, and Cas didn't want to pull him too far out of it. "I'm going to tell Daddy you were very good for me."

Cas crawled off Benny, not bothering to tie him up, and he took one last look at the beautiful bruises he left on Benny's left shoulder before he pulled the condom off his dick, buttoned his jeans, and left Benny alone in the basement with the lights off.

Once upstairs, he threw the condom in the trash, then grabbed a bottle of water out of the fridge on his way to the office. He opened his jeans back up and got comfortable on his office chair, taking a long drink as the video started.

_"I dunno why I'm remembering this now," Benny said. "I've forgotten so much, and I just get... flashes. Flashes, bits and pieces. But the dream I just had brought some of it back."_

Cas was only up to video forty-three, and skipping ahead to eighty-seven meant he would miss out on some things, but he could go back and watch them after he found out whatever it was Benny needed him to know.

_"It's cold. Metal. So fuckin' cold," Benny said from his seat on the floor in the closet. He was only wearing his boxers, and the outline of his hard cock was visible. "Did a Google search when I woke up, and nothin' that came up looked like what he used on me."_

_Benny sighed and ran a hand down the front of his boxers, palming his cock. He wasn't trying to get off, but it seemed more like a distraction from the shit going on in his head._

_"It was long and kinda thick. Well, guess it felt thick, but since I've never had anything up my ass before, maybe it wasn't really that big, but it felt big," Benny said, closing his eyes and leaning his head back on the door jamb. "Had a cord that attached to some kinda box with dials. Never saw it, but when he pushed it in my ass, felt like I was gonna fuckin' die. Electrocution." Benny huffed out a laugh. "What a way to go. Fucker damn near killed me with electrocution up my fuckin' ass."_

Cas was already planning another shopping session online. He had some of his own equipment, but it was for personal play, and he didn't really want to use it on Benny, but he could if he needed to.

_"Made me come every fuckin' time," Benny said, letting out a little gasp as his hips bucked forward. "Fuckin' hated it. He'd turn it up so high, thought I'd explode, and there were times I wish it'd killed me. Between that and the little wand he shoved in my dick, it was like I couldn't even control my own body. Flip o'the switch and I'm comin'."_

Electrical stimulation play could be overwhelming, especially at higher levels. For someone like Benny who had a very vanilla sex life before he was taken, it had to have been terrifying and frustrating. So new and different that he could not have known it wouldn't kill him.

_"Thinkin' 'bout it is the only thing that gets me off since I've been back," Benny said, shoving his hand down his boxers and squeezing his cock. "Anna's givin' up on me. Think she's gonna leave me. Why would she stay when I can't be what she needs?"_

_Benny pulled his cock out of his boxers and stroked it, eyes still closed, gasping as he spread his legs and fucked his fist._

_"Can't touch her," Benny said. "Can't stand the smell of her pussy, the way it feels around my dick. I love her, and I wanna be here for her, but I can't even make her happy. What good am I? Damaged goods and can't even make my girlfriend come."_

Cas really didn't want to think of Dean. He was free of him for the first time in weeks, and he was playing with a man downstairs who had begged to be hurt. Who had signed a contract allowing Cas to do whatever he wanted free of restrictions. Sure, he wasn't going to kill Benny, but the terrified whimpers and cries were getting him off more than his hand on his dick in the shower, which was all he had for weeks.

_"She's puttin' up with all my shit," Benny said, face scrunching up in both pain and pleasure. "I need to pull my weight, to be at least some'a what she needs, but I just can't. And now I can't even get her off. No reason for her to stay around."_

Cas had never understood why people felt a lot of the things they felt, especially when he knew that most people felt a devotion to the person they loved. How could Benny think he was no good to his girlfriend when she loved him? From what Cas had observed of human nature over the years, his girlfriend was probably just happy to have him back. The hospital records clearly showed that Anna had been there for his physical therapy and had even done dressing changes on his wounds when he got out of the hospital.

He thought of Dean and how it had seemed like all he wanted was for Cas to use him, but even that wasn't enough. He was recovering, and yet he wanted Cas to hurt him, to ignore the fact that he had been tortured by Ruslan.

It didn't make sense to Cas, and yet there was Benny saying essentially the same thing as Dean. Cas ran a hand over his face, frustration burning in his chest. He missed some of the video, lost in his own thoughts, so he moved it back a minute and started it again.

_"She says she wants me," Benny said. "Said she doesn't even care that I can't fuck her, but I don't need her pity. That's the only reason she's stayed so far. She'd never forgive herself for leaving a guy who's so fucked up he can't even fuck his fuckin' girl-ah! Fuck! Ah!"_

_Benny relaxed back against the door jamb, face relaxing as he got his breathing under control. He pushed his thumb in hard under the head of his cock and winced, cock jerking again and a last bit of release oozing out onto his stomach._

_Benny opened his eyes, a little dazed, looking around the closet like he had forgotten where he was. He looked down at his stomach, frowning, then shut off the video._

Before Cas hit stop, the next video started, and Benny was holding the camera this time instead of resting it on something in the closet. He was lying in bed on his side.

_"I made her leave," Benny said softly. "Told her to get out even though I wanted her here. She makes me feel safe, as stupid as that sounds. No reason for me to feel that way, but now she's gone I..."_

_Benny sniffled, wiping his eyes, the camera jostled by his movements._

_"She didn't deserve to be with someone so fucked up," Benny said, lip curling in disgust. "She deserved someone who could treat her right. Someone who could keep her safe and make her happy. Make love to her. Somebody who could eat her out without throwin' up. She deserves better than me, and it was the right decision to make her leave."_

_Benny sniffled again, then pushed his face into the pillow, taking a big breath before turning his head back toward the camera._

_"I'm gonna miss the way she smells," he said, a sad smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. "Even when she wasn't here, I could smell her and it would make me feel safe. If I could'a fit into her shirts and jeans, I would'a worn them all the time. Now all I have is her pillow."_

The video stopped and the next one started, but Cas shut the program down. He had the information he needed. The video Benny had told him to watch.

He opened a browser and searched for someplace local he could get what he needed. He focused on the search instead of wondering what Dean was doing, alone in his empty house and wearing Cas' clothes like Benny wanted to wear Anna's clothes.

He drove to two different stores to get the supplies, fighting the urge to drive to Dean's house, and it wasn't until he got back home and started creating a mock-up of the thing they used on Benny that Cas realized Dean was turning into the man downstairs in the basement. Maybe he wouldn't ever get as bad as Benny, but Cas didn't want that to happen. Not even a little.

Dean was a problem. An emotional mess that Cas didn't know the answer to. He didn't want to admit it, but he needed help, and he knew who had the answers.

"Hello, Sam," Cas said.

"Oh, shit!" Sam yelped, flinching back in his office chair, eyes wide as he looked up at Cas, standing in the doorway. "How did you get in my house?" he asked, then shook his head. "Never mind. Stupid question. You scared the shit out of me."

Cas smiled. He figured Sam would be fun to play with, and he had been right. The back door to the house was easy to open with his lock pick kit, and there was no security system to speak of, let alone a surveillance system.

"Did you need something?" Sam asked as he stood up, padding around the desk in bare feet, nothing but pajama bottoms on in the middle of the day. "Everything okay?"

"I came to you for advice on dealing with Dean," Cas said, taking a seat on the couch nearest the door.

Sam sat down on the other end of the couch, tucking his long legs up and appearing much smaller than his frame would make him seem, turned toward Cas. "What's wrong?"

"You haven't spoken to him in the last two or three days? Cas asked.

"Yeah," Sam said, though Cas suspected Sam didn't really want to share that information.

"He's no longer living with me," Cas said, and the twinge of pain in his chest was unexpected.

"I didn't know that," Sam said, shaking his head. It was a lie, and Sam was a bad liar. "Mom invited you guys to another dinner in two weeks, but as far as I know you're invited too and Dean hasn't said otherwise."

Cas felt a little something in his chest let loose. Something relaxed. If Dean had told his mother about what Cas had done, she might have come after him. It also would have meant Dean was serious about the separation instead of just taking a break.

"You need advice?" Sam asked, nose scrunched up, adorably confused. "Why do you need _my_ advice?"

"You grew up watching your parents interact on a daily basis," Cas said. "I don't understand human emotions all that well, and what he's doing and saying... I don't know what to do, and I need your help."

"Okay, what happened?" Sam asked, comfortable with discussing things in a way Cas had never been.

"He's handled the trauma very well," Cas said, shifting on the couch and making himself a bit more comfortable, resting his right arm on the back of the couch. "He's had nightmares, but when he's sleeping with me and I allow him to have skin-on-skin contact, he doesn't have nightmares."

Sam smiled. "Yeah, he's done that before."

Cas nodded, another piece of the puzzle of Dean clicking into place. "He asked me to hurt him. To treat him like I normally do."

Sam's face darkened. "You normally hurt him?" His voice was low and almost threatening. Sam was threatening a serial killer, and it warmed Cas' heart just a bit.

"The sex tends to be rough," Cas said, nodding, "and I enjoy things like spanking and pain play."

"And he likes it too?" Sam asked, eyes narrowing.

"Yes," Cas said, watching carefully as Sam calmed with the knowledge Cas wasn't just using Dean with no regard to Dean's happiness. "He says it's part of what he likes about me, and even though he hasn't been with partners who like the things I do, he's realizing how much he likes it too."

"Okay," Sam said, nodding. "So he wants you to keep going with that and you won't?"

"You know what Ruslan did to him," Cas said, and by the way Sam flinched a little he knew Sam was remembering exactly what Ruslan had done. He might not have seen the damage himself, but he knew what happened. "I'm giving him time to heal."

Sam smiled as he looked down at his hands, then he let out a chuckle. "I think I might know what the problem is."

A small thrill ran through Cas' body. He hadn't even explained everything yet and Sam already knew what was wrong. He made the right decision in talking to Sam.

"He's moody," Sam said, and when Cas nodded, Sam smiled again. "He's clingy and demanding and even acting out, maybe doing things that push your buttons."

"Yes," Cas said. "I'm trying my best to remain calm around him, but he's doing things I wouldn't have allowed him to do before, and it's becoming increasingly difficult to hold back."

"You want my advice?" Sam asked, and when Cas nodded, Sam shrugged. "Okay, you need to stop treating him differently."

"He's healing," Cas said, even more frustrated. "Your mother said to let him be clingy. Even threatened me."

Sam let out a huff of laughter. "Yeah, he needs that too. Needs the contact and the closeness, but he also needs to know that he's not broken and he still serves a purpose."

Cas frowned. "He doesn't need to serve a purpose. I've told him I like having him around. I've even shown him the messes he makes and told him I don't care about it because that's how much I like having him around. I've never let anybody do that in my home before."

"There's the problem," Sam said gently. "Don't treat him differently. If you used to get pissed over the things he does, get pissed. If you used to push him up against a wall and fuck him until he screams, do that. If you used to pull his hair, pull his hair."

Cas let it sink in. All the ways he had changed, how differently he treated Dean over the last few weeks. Dean had told him he didn't want that, and Cas thought he was doing what was best.

"Humans need time to recover," Cas said, feeling even more alien, like more of an outsider than he felt before. What Dean wanted didn't make sense.

"Part of recovery is working your way through it, not avoiding it," Sam said. "Dean isn't the type to dance around something. What you're doing to him, he's interpreting it as you no longer wanting him."

"He said that," Cas said, frowning. "I thought he was just mad at me or having anxiety issues. I don't want to damage him."

Sam gave him a small smile. "You care about him."

Cas grimaced. "More than I have anybody in a long time. It's hard to get used to."

Sam's smile grew. "He really cares about you too."

"Then why is he pushing me away?" Cas asked.

"People do that," Sam said, and Cas thought about Benny pushing his girlfriend away. "When we're hurting and we think we're a burden, we try to push loved ones away because we think we're hurting them."

"He's frustrating me more by pushing me away. It's more frustrating than anything he's done before that," Cas said, anger flaring in his chest.

Sam chuckled. "Yeah, it's not logical. It's ridiculous, actually. Emotions are reactive instead of productive."

"So what do I do?" Cas asked.

"He's at his house, but has he talked to you or texted you?" Sam asked.

"I texted him last night to ask about a case, and he replied," Cas said, then shook his head, "but he's not annoying me."

"Annoying you?" Sam asked, left side of his mouth quirking up into a half smile.

Cas nodded. "He enjoys pushing me. Doing little things that frustrate me. But he always knows when to stop. Almost always. It's been in a flirtatious way, but since Ruslan it's changed, and he pushes in a different way. Like he's daring me to get mad and..."

"And kick him out?" Sam asked.

"Yes, it's like he wants me to tell him I don't want him anymore," Cas said.

"He's testing," Sam said, voice full of confidence in what he said. "He's not sure you still want him."

"I do. I've told him I do," Cas said, voice raising a little.

"I know that and you know that," Sam said, "but Dean needs to see proof of it instead of just hearing the words."

"I'm still not the one that kicked him out!" Cas said, the burning in his chest even stronger. He didn't understand any of it.

"Okay, hang on, I'm not trying to upset you," Sam said, holding his hands up in surrender. "I know this is hard to wrap your head around. Mom still has a hard time with it even though she's dealt with raising two boys and she's had Dad all these years."

"I doubt I'm going to understand it," Cas said, shaking his head. "Tell me what I should do next. It's easier for me to look at a possible solution and work my way back on things I don't understand."

Sam's smile turned into a smirk. "He's going to fight this."

Cas shrugged. "That's nothing new."

Sam nodded. "Fair enough. If the neighbors call the cops, I'll vouch for you."

"Thank you," Cas said.


	7. Chapter 7

It was a bad idea to leave Benny alone for any length of time, but Benny also wasn't his priority. As much as he hated to admit it, even to himself, Dean was his priority. He had been for some time.

He drove over to Dean's house, breathing a sigh of relief when he caught sight of the Impala sitting in the driveway. The back door to the house was locked, but it didn't take Cas long to pick it. It wasn't the first time he had picked Dean's lock.

Dean was watching TV, sprawled out on the couch. A single beer bottle was sitting on the coffee table, half empty.

"Dude, what the fuck!?" Dean nearly yelped, voice loud and half startled, half pissed as he sat up, eyes wide. "Knock on the front door like a normal person."

Cas picked up the remote control and shut the TV off. Dean scowled at him. He hadn't shaved in a few days, so he was scruffy, and his hair was greasy, a bad case of bed head. He was still wearing the sweatpants and shirt he took from Cas' house.

"Hey!" Dean yelled as Cas grabbed him by the arm and yanked him off the couch. Dean stumbled into him, then pulled back, trying to wrench his arm free.

Cas moved with Dean, letting him pull, then yanked and turned Dean, shoving his arm up behind his back. Dean growled in pain, back bowing as he tried to relieve the sharp pain in his arm and shoulder.

"I didn't give you permission to leave the house," Cas said in Dean's right ear. "I'm taking you back home, and if you fight me, you'll be going home with a beat red ass. Understood?"

"No," Dean said.

"No, you don't understand?' Cas asked.

"No, I'm not going with you," Dean said, biting off the words. "I'll still be your Handler, but that's all."

"No," Cas said.

Dean struggled against him for a moment, then froze. "No, what?"

"No, that's not all," Cas said as he pushed Dean toward the back door. "You fought to get where you were with me. I'm not gonna let you fuck all that up because of Ruslan. I'm taking you home."

"I don't want to go back," Dean said, grabbing onto the counter top with his free hand. "I'm sick of being treated like a broken toy."

Cas gave him a good shove, and Dean turned as he stumbled, his back hitting the edge of the counter top. He held on with both hands, keeping himself up, face red and teeth clenched.

"I made a mistake," Cas said as he crowded Dean against the counter top. A little shorter than Dean, but making up for it with his presence as he leaned against him. "What happened with Ruslan scared the shit out of me, and I let it change me, just like you said."

Dean didn't speak, but his eyes got a little watery, and he bit his lower lip, breathing a bit uneven.

"I was wrong," Cas said. "I see that now, and I'm fixing it. You're going home with me, and I'm going to make you come so many times you're going to beg me to stop. I'm going to tie you to the fucking bed if I have to, but you're staying with me."

Dean looked down at Cas' shirt, trying to control his emotions, but he was losing the battle. A tear slid down his left cheek.

"You're going to annoy me. You're going to frustrate me. You're going to push me. You're going to make me take you out to dinner. You're going to change the channel while I'm still interested in a show," Cas said, watching as each sentence hit Dean harder than the one before it. "And I'm going to make you clean up after yourself. I'm going to make you scream and get off on it myself. I'm going to throw you in the fucking bath tub when you mouth off at me. I'm going to drag you down to the basement and hurt you so much that Benny is going to know exactly who gets most of my attention. Exactly who my priority is."

More tears fell as Dean's insecurities were exposed and addressed. It might not have been what any normal person would have wanted, but Dean never claimed to be normal, and Cas was a far cry from it. Sam had hit Cas over the head with a figurative two-by-four, and Cas had his plan, had his fix for the problem that was Dean's emotions.

"Fuck you," Dean whispered, his bottom lip wobbling as more tears streaked down his face.

Cas leaned in, wrapping his arms around Dean's upper body, trapping his arms. He pressed his body against Dean's, letting him feel how hard he was. Hard just from being so close to Dean again. Hard from what Dean did to him. The tears and the frustration and whatever the fuck it was that made Dean the person he was.

"I'm going to lock you in a cage so you can't get hard until you decide to behave," Cas said, voice low and firm. "I'm going to fuck you in the shower and the kitchen and even over my desk in the office. I'm going to wrap your dick in a pretty ribbon and make you kneel on the coffee table while I watch TV just so I can hear you beg and whimper."

Dean squirmed, trying to twist away, but Cas had a good hold on him, and he wasn't letting go.

"I don't give a fuck what I deserve or don't deserve," Cas said. "What I _want_ is you, and you don't get to turn my life upside down and shove yourself into my face until I finally realize how much I like it, then take it all away from me. You're coming home, and if you ever even think of storming out of our house again, you're going to find out what each and every tool of mine feels like after I strap you down to my table."

Dean took a few gasping breaths, trying so hard to control his emotions that his body was trembling. He looked Cas in the eye, a spark of defiance and a little bit of a smirk even through the tears. "Make me," he whispered.

Cas hooked his right leg around Dean's left and knocked him off balance, using it to his advantage and sending them both to the tile floor of the kitchen. Dean grunted as he hit, Cas landing on top of him. Dean spread his legs, and Cas pulled himself back enough to kneel behind Dean, yanking his own sweatpants down Dean's legs, then kicking them aside.

Dean wasn't wearing anything underneath them, and Cas smiled as Dean let out a hiss, the cold, hard floor not all that inviting for his dick. Cas pulled the lube out of his pocket and flipped the top open before shoving the bottle between Dean's ass cheeks and squeezing.

"Fuck, that's cold!" Dean complained, squirming.

Cas squeezed out so much it dripped onto the floor, and he tossed the bottle aside, then pushed a finger inside Dean. It was more gentle than he had ever been with Dean, but as soon as it was obvious Dean wasn't in any pain, Cas pulled his finger out and shoved two back in.

Dean spread his legs wider and tilted his hips up as Cas pushed his fingers in deep over and over again, fucking in and out. Dean lifted up, trying to get more, so Cas pulled his fingers out and lined his cock up, thrusting in and not stopping until he bottomed out, Dean groaning and his whole body relaxing against the tile.

Cas closed his eyes, letting out a sigh. Dean was warm and tight and nearly vibrating with excitement. Dean's hair had gotten a little shaggy since Ruslan, and Cas took advantage of it.

"Ouch!" Dean whined as Cas grabbed a handful of hair and yanked Dean's head back and to the right.

Dean had his hands flat on the floor, shoulders tense, hips wiggling as he tried to get Cas to move. His hair was dirty and smelled, and Cas caught a whiff of the body odor from Dean's armpits. It was Dean, and he liked it. Liked that Dean wanted so badly to hold onto him that he hadn't even showered and changed out of the sweatpants.

Cas spread his knees, moving Dean's legs even farther apart, then he started fucking Dean hard, Dean's body bouncing forward on the floor, then back. Cas was grunting with the effort, and Dean was letting out little whimpers in between demanding _more_ and _harder_ and, "C'mon, Cas, fuck me! C'mon!"

Dean moaned as Cas yanked on his hair again, neck at an odd angle that had to be painful, but Dean didn't seem to mind.

"Can't believe it took you so long, Hot Wings," Dean said, a smirk evident in his tone of voice.

Well, Cas couldn't just let _that one_ go. He draped himself over Dean, letting go of his hair and instead biting down on Dean's left shoulder hard enough to draw blood, the taste of Dean's skin strong and the blood even stronger.

"Fuck!" Dean cried out, asshole clenching around Cas' cock. 

Dean was squirming and wiggling beneath Cas, all those little noises that told Cas he was about to come, and the only stimulation had to be his cock sliding over the tile floor, his precome easing the way, and the thought of that turned Cas on even more.

"Told you not to call me that," Cas growled, then bit Dean again, this time a few inches to the right of where Dean's skin was still sluggishly bleeding.

It was beautiful, and Cas couldn't resist. He flicked his tongue over the wounds, the coppery tang making him shiver. He closed his mouth over the wound and sucked.

"Fuckin' vampire," Dean said, letting out a chuckle. "Vampire with wings."

Cas didn't want it to end, didn't want to come, but the rush of irritation over Dean's continued teasing about the scars on his back pushed him over the edge and he squeezed his eyes shut, tongue poking the wounds as he sucked and shoved his cock in as deep as he could, coming inside Dean.

Dean wriggled around a bit, impatient to come, and Cas chuckled, lazy and satisfied after coming. He pulled himself back, getting to his knees again, but when Dean tried to move, he put both hands on Dean's back and held him down.

"Stay where you are," Cas said.

"I wanna come!" Dean said, just as demanding as the day he insisted Cas kiss him.

"Then you're going to fuck the floor," Cas said, his cock slipping out of Dean's hole.

"C'mon, suck me off or something," Dean said, trying to turn over. "At least a reach-around!"

Cas smacked Dean's left ass cheek. "Fuck the floor or you don't get to come."

Dean huffed. "Are you serious?!"

Cas smiled at the indignant tone. "If you can't come like that, you don't get to come tonight."

"Oh, fuck you!" Dean growled, but he started humping the floor.

Cas scooted back so he could watch, and it was so good he wrapped his hand around his cock, stroking slowly. Dean's hole was leaking, and the more he struggled and humped the floor, the more his hole leaked, gobs dripping to the floor as his ass wriggled and his legs strained, his back arching, and his balls sliding over the tile.

He couldn't see Dean's cock because his balls were in the way, but there was more than enough going on for Cas to enjoy every bit. Dean's toes were curling, and he panted as he tried to find the perfect angle. His asshole was loose from the fucking and a few shades darker than normal, puffy, shiny from the lube and jizz.

"Can I use my hand?" Dean asked.

"No," Cas said, then reached forward and smacked the inside of Dean's right thigh.

"Fuck!" Dean whined, thighs shaking not only from the strain of what he was doing, but also the pain of the smack. "Should've replaced the flooring in here. Grout lines are too fuckin' thick. Gonna get a sore on the ridge of my dick."

"I'll kiss it and make it better," Cas said, smirking as Dean grumbled about stupid serial killers and their stupid turn-ons and the stupid things they make people do.

"Fuck, I'm gonna come," Dean said, hips stuttering as he got closer and closer to where he wanted to be. "Oh, fuck! Oh, Cas. Cas, fuck!"

Dean slid over the tile floor, almost sobbing as he came, asshole clenching and balls tight. He slowed down and finally stopped moving, his panting breaths slowing. The floor was a mess, and it made Cas' cock twitch just thinking about it.

"You're gonna have to carry me home," Dean said. "You know, to that place you called ours?"

Cas was still stroking his cock, and just as Dean started to turn over, Cas shoved back in and fucked him again, Dean moving on the tile even more now that he had dumped a load on the floor.

"Dude, my dick is sore!" Dean complained.

"It won't take long," Cas said, then grunted as he fucked into Dean a few more times, hissing as he came, his cock aching with the orgasm.

"Your refractory time is insane, you know that?" Dean said, then chuckled.

Cas pulled out, then stood up and headed for the door. "Get your sweats back on and come with me. I'll make Sam bring the car over later."

He walked out of the house while Dean was still whining about evil serial killers who make their victims walk even though they're too tired and fucked out to move.

"And isn't the fuck _er_ supposed to clean up the fuck _ee_?" Dean yelled.

Cas just smiled.


	8. Chapter 8

Benny had been in the house for seven days, and he remembered more small details, but he still couldn't remember the faces. There was nothing to identify the kidnappers, and most of the information he had blurted out had been in the police reports anyway, like the sound of the planes overhead and the smell of burning garbage about a week apart from the local recycling center. Still not enough to narrow it down to even one city or state, let alone a person.

Benny was getting frustrated, but Cas and Dean were in it for the long haul. They had finished all the videos, looked through all the photos, and read all the notes.

The doorbell rang, and Cas set aside the police report he was reading over again to answer it. Sam was standing on the other side of the door, and when Cas opened it, Sam smiled, the barely-there crow's feet making an appearance.

"Hey, just dropping off the Impala," Sam said as he handed Cas the keys. "And Dean said something about going through Benny's house to look for panties, so Jess and I are gonna check it out."

"Benny's house?" Cas asked, then frowned. He and Dean had talked about looking through Benny's house for a pair of his girlfriend's panties. In one of the videos Benny had mentioned a handkerchief of hers he had with him when he was kidnapped and how it had gotten him through the hardest times because he could smell her. "Dean told you?"

"Dude!" Dean yelled from the kitchen. "Fuckin' gettin' me in trouble!"

"Sorry!" Sam yelled as Jess walked up and stood by her husband.

"Don't worry," Jess said, "we won't tell anybody else."

Cas nodded. "Okay, but you don't have to go to his house. Dean and I can do that."

"It's not a problem," Jess said, tucking her hair behind her ear. "We'll take a look around and bring you what we find. We'd like to help."

"Okay, then we'll see you later," Cas said. "Thank you for bringing the car. And don't forget to use gloves."

Jess winked at him and Sam smiled before they turned and left. Cas closed and locked the door, then turned to find Dean standing by the couch in the living room, eyes a little wide.

"Am I in trouble?" he asked.

"Definitely," Cas said with a nod. He watched as Dean squirmed, Cas' cock twitching in his jeans.

"I thought they could help," Dean said, then took a step back as Cas took step toward him.

"But you didn't even ask me," Cas said, voice low and threatening. "What if Jess had decided the CON should be notified about this?"

"She wouldn't do that," Dean said, taking another step back.

"You still didn't even ask me," Cas said.

"How can I make it up to you?" Dean asked, an adorable smile tugging at the corners of his mouth.

Dean wasn't fully back to who he was before Ruslan took him, but some of the little things that Cas liked most were resurfacing, and Cas loved it. Wanted to do everything he could to make it come back even more, even faster. Talking to Sam had been the best thing, and he made a mental note to sign Sam up for the chocolate-of-the-month club. Sam had mentioned it when they were all sitting around the dinner table last time, and Cas was certain Sam would appreciate it.

"I think it's time I played with you next to Benny," Cas said, grabbing Dean by the arm and pulling him toward the basement.

"Oh, fuck!" Dean said, his breathing shallow as they made their way down the stairs. It was obvious he was a bit scared, but he wasn't fighting it.

Benny was sleeping after having had some lunch. He was on the mattress, curled up as much as he could even though he was a big man. If Cas were the type to think such things were adorable, he'd think Benny was cute enough to snuggle with. As Cas pushed Dean down onto the mattress, Benny woke up and scooted away, curled up on the far edge of the mattress, shutting his eyes tight, the skin at the corners crinkling with the effort.

Cas stripped Dean out of his clothes roughly, ignoring the token struggles and grunts. Once he was undressed, his clothes in a pile next to the bed, Cas grabbed Dean's balls and squeezed.

"Ah, no, fuck! Oh, shit!" Dean whined, both of his hands moving toward Cas', ready to pry them off his aching balls, but Cas squeezed harder, and Dean doubled over, yelling in pain as he tried to get away.

There was a vibrator at the end of the bed. One they used earlier on Benny. The condom had been taken off, and Cas didn't bother putting another on. He turned his right hand, twisting Dean's balls. Dean tried to follow the movement, turning onto his stomach and spreading his legs, hoping to ease the pain as he panted and whined.

Dean's hole was still wet from when Cas had fucked him in the family room earlier, so Cas pushed the vibrator in and turned it up all the way, meeting no resistance.

"Ah, fuck! Fuck! Oh, shit fucking damn it!" Dean cried out.

Cas didn't pay much attention to the time, and instead played with the squirming body beneath him. He alternated between pulling and squeezing Dean's balls, then stroking his cock. Turning the vibrator up, then down, only to crank it back up again.

Dean was covered in sweat, his body trembling by the time Cas shoved the vibrator in deep and stroked Dean's cock until he came. Dean was so worn out that he just panted into the mattress, small tremors and twitches the only movement beyond the panting breaths. Cas pulled the vibrator out and turned it off before setting it on the end of the bed.

Cas saw movement out of the corner of his eye and smiled. He nudged Dean and pointed at Benny, who was jerking off as quietly as he could. Dean sat up and gathered his clothes while Benny came with a small gasp.

Instead of a sandwich, that night Cas took down two slices of pizza, smiling when he heard Benny moan in pleasure as he savored the pizza.

The next morning Cas was looking through some cases, deciding which one he wanted to take when he was done with Benny's. His black mug was sitting to the right of his keyboard, a cork coaster under it. Dean had made the coffee, and he put something with caramel in it along with cream.

Cas took a sip, grimacing at the taste. It was sweet, but he could still taste the bitterness of the coffee. He sat forward, resting his elbows on the desk and putting the heels of his feet up on the chair's casters, his toes curling against the hardwood floor.

Dean walked in, a frown on his face. "Sam still hasn't gotten back to me," he said, holding up his cell phone. "I texted him this morning to ask about the panties, but he never replied."

"Does he always?" Cas asked.

"If he's really busy he doesn't," Dean said, "but that doesn't happen very often, and I know he doesn't have to work today."

"Did you text Jess?"

Dean nodded. "Mom and Dad too. Jess didn't get back to me, but Mom and Dad both said they texted Sam and he didn't reply. They're worried too."

"Let's check out the house," Cas said, locking the computer and getting up.

"Thanks, Cas," Dean said with a small smile.

Sam and Jess weren't at their own home, and neither was Jess' SUV. Dean was trying to keep his cool, but Cas could tell he was worried by the way his jaw was clenched, lips thinned, and his shoulders tense as Cas put the SUV in drive.

"Let's go to Benny's house and see if they decided to go there today instead of yesterday," Cas said, already suspicious something was wrong, but hoping Dean wouldn't catch on.

Dean nodded, quiet as Cas drove them to Benny's house. Dean let out a sign of relief when they turned the corner and saw Jess' SUV in the driveway.

The front door was standing open, and Cas was cautious as he walked in, always suspicious, but it had kept him alive all these years. They searched the house, heading for Benny's bedroom. The drawers were open, some of the clothing on the floor, and the nightstands were open too.

Cas looked to Dean, who shrugged and headed for the en suite bathroom. He stopped in his tracks when they heard a muffled scream.

Dean lunged for the closet, throwing the door open to find Jess was on the floor, arms and legs zip-tied, a gag in her mouth, and a blindfold over her eyes. She had been using the zip tie on her wrists, attempting to pull the pin on the closet door out, but she only had it partially removed.

"Shit," Dean breathed as he went to his knees by her.

He helped her sit up, then untied the gag and blindfold around her head, taking the gag out of her mouth before pulling a switchblade out of his pocket and cutting through the zip ties as Cas kept an eye out for anyone still in the house.

"What time is it?" Jess asked, squinting as she adjusted to the light. She was in work mode, ever the Handler, had had most likely cataloged everything she could leading up to the moment Dean and Cas found her.

"Nine forty-six a.m.," Cas said.

"They've had Sam for fourteen hours," Jess said as Dean helped her up off the floor. "I didn't see their faces. They took us by surprise. They were both white, I saw that much. A male and female."

"Fuck! Benny's kidnappers," Dean said, a fire in his eyes that said he was about to kill someone without any moral objections.

"What did they say?" Cas asked.

"I'll tell you in the car on the way back to your house," Jess said. "After what I heard, I think I can help you get more out of Benny. He saw their faces, I'm sure of it, and between the three of us, we're going to help him remember."

Cas nodded and led the way out of the room and out to the SUV. Dean stopped in the driveway, looking down at what used to be a flowerbed by the cement, but had been neglected and was nothing but dirt. He pulled his phone out and took a few pictures.

"What is it?" Cas asked.

"I'm going to call Ash," Dean said as they all got into the SUV. "He'll know what kind of vehicle these tire tracks are from."

"They're brother and sister," Jess said as Cas drove home as fast as he could without putting them at risk of getting pulled over, even though the CON-issued badge in his wallet would get him out of it. "Benny isn't the first, but they came back for him because the woman liked him for some reason."

Cas looked at Jess in the rear view mirror as Dean talked quietly with Ash on the phone. "Any ideas on why, given what they were talking about?"

"She was frantic," Jess said, gently rubbing the bruised areas on her wrists. "She acted as if Benny had something she really needed. She said 'he's the only one' a few times, and her brother kept reassuring her they would find him. I think whatever they got from him or need from him is the reason he's still alive."

"What about Sam?" Dean asked.

"The brother suggested they take him," Jess said, voice strained. "She didn't want to. She said something about Sam being too tall. I don't know why that matters, but she likes Benny's size. She kept talking about Benny's pretty eyes and the color of his hair."

"Maybe she just likes him and wanted to keep him," Dean said after finishing his call. "Maybe we can use that to get Sam back. We can offer them Benny."

"I don't know if they'll figure out how Sam is related to this whole thing," Jess said, "but they have our wallets, our ID, and if they haven't been to our house yet, I think they'll go through it soon."

"We were there and everything looked fine," Dean said. "What else did they say?"

"They kept talking about how they could use Sam to get Benny," Jess said, "so I don't think he's in much danger. They didn't hurt him other than what it took to get him subdued and tied up. When they carried him out, they were gentle, and the woman told Sam that Daddy would take care of him."

"She calls her brother Daddy?" Dean asked, pulling a face.

"I don't think so," Jess said. "It didn't seem like she was talking about her brother or to him when she said Daddy."

"So there are three of them," Cas said.

"That would be my guess," Jess said, nodding.

"Anything else you can remember about them?" Cas asked.

"The girl sounded older than the guy," Jess said with confidence. "I'm pretty sure she's in charge between the two of them. I'm not sure if Daddy is in charge of both of them, but he definitely takes care of them."

"Do you think they're blood relatives?" Cas asked.

"I really can't say," Jess said, shrugging. "There was a hint of a Canadian accent in her speech, even more so in the brother's, so even if they're not blood related, they might have grown up around each other."

Cas pulled into the driveway of his house and shut the SUV off. Before he even opened his door, both Jess and Dean were out of the SUV and stalking toward the house.

"Stop!" Cas said. Both of them turned around, twin expressions of annoyance on their face. "You're not going down there yet."

Both of them started talking at once, both arguing that they were sure as hell going down there to get information out of Benny, and Jess had a few choice words for where Cas could shove it.

Cas reached out and grabbed each of them by the front of their shirts and yanked them close, both of them freezing in fear. They both knew they pushed a little too much. "You will not be going down there without my permission. That's a human being down there, and if you push him too hard, he'll break and won't be of any use. He's our best lead right now. For Sam's sake, you need to stay in control of your emotions."

"If we step up what we've already been doing," Dean said, "especially with Jess' help, we could push him into remembering."

"I've broken a lot of people," Cas said. "I can promise you that if you go down there in the state of mind you're in right now, you're going to break him, and he'll be of no use. You have to trust me. I want to get Sam back too."

"Why?" Jess asked, voice soft.

"Why what?" Cas asked, almost scowling at her.

"I've read your files, I've talked to you, and I've talked to Dean about you," Jess said. "Why do you want Sam back if you don't even care about him?"

"Does it matter?" Cas asked.

Jess nodded. "Yeah, it kinda does. If you're only doing this for the challenge..."

"The man in the basement is mine right now," Cas interrupted. "If I have to tie you and Dean up and toss you in my attic to keep you away from him, that's what I'll do. Either you do this my way or you get a vacation in my attic. You can question my motives later."

He didn't bother waiting for a response. He pushed them back, then headed up the walkway to his front door. He never noticed how much the two of them were alike before, and he wondered if Jess or Dean ever noticed. He wondered if Sam ever noticed. It made everything easier for Cas because what worked with Dean would likely work with Jess too, and if Jess was as stubborn, dedicated, and smart as Dean, Cas had an amazing team on his hands.

Jess and Dean followed him inside, and Cas went straight to his office. He unlocked his computer, then pushed Jess into the office chair and opened one of the videos she needed to watch before dealing with Benny.

"You're going to put what you already know about the brother and sister team together with what Benny says in three different videos I'm going to play for you," Cas said, then started the first video.

Dean stood in the doorway, bouncing on the balls of his feet and ready to do some damage in order to find his baby brother. Cas took him to the living room, where he left the toy he was building. It was ready, and he handed the thick wand to Dean.

"This is the part that goes in his ass," Cas said, holding onto the handle. "Keep both hands on it while I turn it up. Don't let go."

Dean flinched as the thing started, wincing as the electricity flowed through his fingers and hands. Cas pulled the handle, letting the metal slide through Dean's fingers and allowing Dean to feel the effects of less and less skin being exposed to the electricity. Dean yelped as only his index, thumb, and the webbing between were left touching the wand, and he pulled his hand away, shaking it out.

"The electricity is distributed evenly," Cas said. "The more skin it touches, the less severe the shock is. If this is inside him and you've got the dial all the way up, it'll be damn near overwhelming, but pull it almost all the way out and you could cause him to lose consciousness."

Dean nodded. "Got it."

"This is a smaller version and goes inside the penis," Cas said, holding up the smaller wand. "Wrap your hand around it."

Dean did as he was told. "This one feels sharper."

"Smaller piece of metal to distribute the same amount of electricity," Cas said. "The same applies to this. Turn it up high, pull it almost all the way out, and you're going to push him too far. Do I need to put it in your dick so you understand that you are _not_ to do that to him?"

Dean shook his head. "No, I got it." Cas eyed him. "I got it. Really. I want Sam back, and right now you're our best option because Jess and I are too emotionally motivated. Just tell me how to help."


	9. Chapter 9

Jess was kneeling at the head of the mattress, a hand over the back of Benny's head as he screamed, his body shaking as Dean turned the dial up. He turned it back down and Benny whimpered, his body relaxing into the bed. His hole was pink and puffy, lube making it shiny around the metal.

"Are you going to be good for me now?" Jess asked, her voice perky and sweet and almost innocent, a little manic. Cas heard his fair share of creepy over the years, but hearing Jess made the hair at the back of his neck stand on end.

"Yes, yes, I'll be good," Benny sobbed, voice full of snot and tears.

His reactions to Jess were distinctly different than his reactions to Dean playing the part of his kidnapper. She had carefully used what she knew of the female kidnapper and what she saw on the handful of videos they had shown her. It was obvious Benny had no problem imagining Jess was the more violent of his kidnappers, and he was terrified.

Cas nodded at Jess, and Jess scooted forward, unbuttoning her jeans and pulling the zipper down before shoving the jeans and panties down her legs, leaving only her shirt and socks on, having kicked her shoes off before they even came down into the basement.

"Show me what a good boy you can be," Jess said, spreading her legs and pushing her pussy closer to Benny's face.

Dean politely averted his eyes, but Cas had no problem getting a good look. Jess probably tasted good. She wasn't shaved or waxed, but she was trimmed, dark blond curls that weren't at all wet, which told Cas that she wasn't a high-level sadist. Cas was hard and leaking in his jeans, but if watching what they did to Benny didn't turn her on, then she was either too worried about her husband to get excited or she was a little more vanilla than Cas hoped. He was only a little disappointed.

Cas held the wand inside Benny, keeping the level low enough that it would only be a mild irritation, his hole clenching only when Dean turned the dial up.

Benny lifted his head and pushed his face into Jess' pussy, but he gagged, pulling back for a moment, before Jess forced him back in, a hand at the back of his head. He gagged, letting out a whimper, but he didn't try to pull away. He knew better and was more scared of what would happen to him than the strength of his gag reflex.

"Do it _real_ good or I'll have to punish you," Jess said, rubbing her pussy over his face. Her voice was a sharp contrast to the things she was doing to an unwilling participant. That sweetness dripping from every word.

Cas motioned to Dean, and Dean started to turn the dial up. Benny clenched around it, trying to push it out, and as the level raised, he started whining, the muscles in his back going tight.

"Tell her she's got pretty hair," Cas said, making his voice a higher pitch than normal, doing his best to cut out the gravely quality after Jess coached him on the male kidnapper's personality and voice.

Benny squirmed. "You've got pretty hair."

"Say it like you mean it," Cas said, pulling the wand out halfway.

Benny let out a scream, then settled a bit as Cas pushed the wand back in. "Your hair is so pretty, Becky. I love your hair, darlin'."

Dean turned the dial down, then pulled out his phone and texted the new information to Ash. Ash had already been searching the database, but over seventy thousand matches came up for the tire tracks they found at Benny's house. He needed more information to narrow it down.

"What color is my hair?" Jess asked, pushing him against her pussy again, then easing off so he could answer.

"A very pretty blond," Benny said in between gasping breaths. He was trying to control himself, but losing the battle.

"Good boy," Jess cooed.

"Do you remember what color my hair is?" Cas asked, an edge to his voice that felt strange in his throat. Made his ears vibrate and his nose tickle.

"Please," Benny sobbed into Jess' pussy. "I can't. I don't want to do this. Please!"

Cas nodded to Dean, and Dean turned the dial up. Benny's body tensed so much he would've rolled over had he not been held down by three people, and he started to scream again. Jess pushed his face against her pussy, muffling the noise as his body shuddered and jerked, sweat pooling on his back.

Benny's wrists were getting rubbed raw by the rope they used to tie him up, and a small trickle of blood ran down onto his lower back, mixing with the sweat. Any other time Cas would have been playing with the puddle of blood and sweat. It was pretty.

Cas shifted his position on Benny's legs, giving himself more room to pull the wand out, and as he did, Benny screamed even harder, the intensity of the electricity stronger the less contact his asshole had with the metal.

"Be a good boy for me," Jess said, her voice loud enough he might have heard it over his screams.

Cas pushed the wand back in and Dean turned the dial down. Benny panted, trying to catch his breath, his skin clammy, small tremors hitting him in waves.

"Brown," Benny said, voice wrecked from all the screaming, and Cas wished he could see Benny's face, see the red-rimmed eyes and tear tracks down his cheeks. "Andy's hair is brown."

Dean texted Ash the new information as Jess rubbed her pussy over Benny's face. He coughed, trying to pull away, but she wouldn't let him, fingernails digging into the sides of his head. He had pulled away from her before, and the thin trail of blood had dried on his right temple down to his jaw.

"Do you remember what color my eyes are?" Jess asked.

"No, please," Benny sobbed. He began screaming again as Dean turned the dial up. "No! I don't wanna see it! I don't wanna do this! Stop! Stop doing this! I changed my mind!"

Cas slowly pulled the wand out, stopping at the halfway point because any further and it would be too intense. Benny thrashed about, more blood trickling down from his wrists, and Cas moved with him so the wand wouldn't slip out of him any more.

"Stop!" Benny screamed, voice cracking with the strain. "Stop, I remember! I remember! Stop!"

Dean flipped the box off and Cas pulled the wand out of Benny's ass, going slow so he wouldn't do any damage, then set it aside, and the three of them helped Benny roll over onto his back. He had his eyes closed, and there were tear tracks, snot, and sweat making a mess of his face. He had bitten his lip in three different places, one of which was still sluggishly bleeding, a thin trail of blood down to his chin mixing with the drool.

"Get me paper and a pencil," Benny blurted. "I'll draw them. All three of them."

"Don't try to get up yet," Cas said as Dean hurried up the stairs to get supplies. "Jess, get him some water."

Jess pulled her panties and jeans up, then practically ran up the stairs. Benny's breathing slowed, and Cas rolled him onto his side, untying the ropes and freeing Benny's wrists.

"That was awful," Benny said, barely a whisper, his throat most likely sore. Maybe even as sore as when he'd been tortured the first time years ago.

"I know," Cas said, wiping the sweat and tears and snot off Benny's face with a towel.

"But I remember them now," Benny said, a smile growing on his face. He was exhausted, but the relief he felt was easy to sense radiating off him. "I remember them and you're gonna fuckin' find them."

"Yes, we probably will," Cas said, nodding. He wasn't going to promise anything.

"I want you to do it," Benny said, putting his left forearm over his eyes. Neither of his arms were well-coordinated after being tied up. and his movements were exaggerated and clumsy. "All three of them. Can you do that? Will you do that for me?"

"Yes," Cas said. That he could promise. If he found them, he would kill them. And he would have a whole hell of a lot of fun doing it.

"You're really fuckin' good at this," Benny said with a huff as Jess came back downstairs with a bottle of water.

She kneeled at Benny's head and the two of them helped Benny lift his head enough to drink some of the water. He choked a little, and they gave him a chance to breathe before holding the bottle up and letting him drink more.

"All of you were fuckin' amazing," Benny said, then took another sip. "Can finally put faces to the shadows that have been following me. Thank you."

Dean hurried back down the stairs and kneeled next to Benny with the sketch pad and pencil in his hands. Cas and Jess helped Benny sit up, and Benny finally opened his eyes, taking the pad of paper and pencil from Dean. He set the paper on his lap and immediately started on the portraits.

His hands were shaky, but he was determined. "Havin' a hard time sittin up," Benny said, after only a few minutes of sketching, "but I ain't stoppin'."

Dean crawled around behind him and sat with his back to Benny's back, supporting him. Jess had gone back upstairs and brought a bowl of water and a washcloth down. She was wiping Benny down, getting some of the sweat and stink off him. When he started to shiver, Cas put a blanket over his legs.

Jess sat down next to Benny and ran her fingers through his greasy hair while Cas kept his hands on Benny's legs. Benny had been through yet another trauma, and the more human contact he could get, the better he would be able to stave off shock. He needed it to keep him grounded.

Benny finally tore a piece of paper off the pad and handed it to Cas before starting on another sketch. Cas took a picture of the paper with Dean's cell phone and sent it to Ash. The woman was cute. Looked to be in her late 20s or early 30s. Big eyes and an innocence to her smile that didn't mesh with the horrible things she had done to Benny. Cas wondered why Benny had drawn her with a smile, but then maybe that's all he had seen. Jess' description of the woman said she wasn't all that tethered in reality, and Benny had captured a manic expression.

"She wants a baby," Benny said, mostly distracted by his sketching.

No one responded, but Jess leaned even closer, comforting Benny as he worked on the next sketch. He was still sweating, and Jess wiped his brow every time the sweat got close to dripping into his eyes.

"They've taken a lot of men over the years, but she keeps having miscarriages or they never take in the first place," Benny said, almost snarling the words out.

"Fertility issues?" Dean asked.

Benny snorted, shaking his head. "No, idiot issues. They don't know what the fuck they're doin'."

"What do you mean?" Jess asked, fingers gently running through his hair. "They don't know how to take care of a pregnant woman?"

"They trained me to come on that electric thing," Benny said, nodding toward the metal that had recently been inside him, "then she'd scoop up my jizz and rub it on her belly and between her thighs. Sometimes she'd push it up into her pussy, but I don't think that works very often."

"She never sat on your dick?" Dean asked, eyes wide.

Benny chuckled. "No. I'm not sure why, but the whole thing felt to me like a couple'a spoiled rotten kids playin' with toys. Daddy spoiled 'em, sheltered 'em, and gets 'em men to play with. Andy's in it for the fun and to help his sister get pregnant. Daddy has to know how it all works if he's got two kids, but the kids don't get it, and I don't know why Daddy doesn't help them with it. In their 30s and have no clue or maybe whatever's stoppin' her from fuckin' a guy is too much to overcome. Maybe sex is uncomfortable for her. Maybe she's a lesbian. I don't know," he said with a shrug.

Benny pulled the second piece of paper off the pad and handed it to Cas before starting a third drawing. Cas took a picture of that one as well and sent it to Ash.

"They killed all the other men because it didn't work," Benny said. "She'd get furious. She's the one that kills 'em. Killed a guy right next to me one day. Screamed at 'im for not givin' her a baby."

"They let you go," Cas said as he put all the information together in his head and came up with the best logical explanation. Benny was the only one they hadn't killed.

Benny stopped drawing and looked up at Cas, realizing it too, if the pain in his eyes was an indication. He drew in a shuddering breath. "I don't wanna fuckin' know," he nearly growled. "You kill 'em. Kill 'em all. You hear me? You fuckin' kill 'em all and don't tell me any o'that shit. Kill them _all_." His teeth were clenched, and if looks could kill, Benny's original kidnappers would have been dead already.

Cas nodded. "We'll take care of it."

Benny went back to his drawing, and the four of them remained silent until he ripped the paper off the pad and handed it to Cas.

"Go," Benny said. "Find them. I'll get myself home."

"No," Dean said. "You're staying here."

Benny shook his head, trying to get up, but his legs wouldn't even support him kneeling, so he fell back against Dean. "Don't lock me in here. Please. I don't wanna be in here anymore," he said, eyes welling up with tears, breathing becoming heavy again.

"If you promise me you'll stay in the house, I'll let you upstairs," Cas said. "You can eat whatever you want, take a shower, even take a nap on the couch. Watch TV if you want."

"Just don't leave the house," Dean said as he turned and took Benny's left arm, helping him get steady. "You're in no condition to drive or stay alone at your house right now. The front door is broken anyway."

Benny opened his mouth to argue, then sighed. "Okay, I'll stay here. Thank you."

"Do you need one of us to stay with you?" Jess asked.

"I want all of you finding them," Benny said, eyelids drooping. "I promise I won't leave. I just... Please find them. Kill them. Don't worry about me leavin'. Focus all your efforts on them. Please."

Cas nodded. "Okay. Let's get you upstairs."

Benny gave him a smile of thanks, then took their hands as they all got him off the bed and helped him up the stairs.

For everyone in the house, it seemed like days before Ash called them, but it was only hours. They stayed with Benny, helping him shower and change into his sweats. Cas made him food and Jess sat with him on the couch while Dean and Cas did their own research, Dean on his laptop and Cas on his desktop. Jess did what she could on her cell phone.

Once they had the address, all three of them packed the SUV and drove away, leaving Benny to spend his time recovering in Cas' house.

Ash had used the basic info and sketches to find their names and an address. The father had a nine-to-five job, the kids worked part time at the local grocery store, and none of them had anything on their records. They were the typical American family, and no one in the neighborhood would have ever suspected they were anything more.


	10. Chapter 10

The family lived in Las Vegas, Nevada. It only took about five hours to get there, and by nightfall Cas was parking the SUV two blocks away. He pulled out his cell phone, checking for new messages from Ash.

"You've never done this before," Cas said, glancing over his shoulder at Jess in the back seat. "Your emotions will be strong because they have Sam, and your first instinct will be to find him at any cost and without keeping yourself safe."

"This isn't the first time I've helped a Cleaner infiltrate," Jess said evenly. "Ruby and I work as a team."

"Fuck, that's hot," Dean said under his breath.

"I _am_ upset about Sam, and I'm worried that they're hurting him," Jess admitted, Benny's torture fresh in their minds, "but I know busting in there guns blazing isn't the way to save him. In fact, it could get him hurt or killed."

Cas nodded. "Yes, and I want the both of you to remember that. In a situation like this, the first priority isn't saving the victim."

"Cas," Dean started, but Cas held up a hand.

"No," Cas said, shaking his head, "you _have to_ listen to me on this or Sam's going to get killed. Remember when we caught Louter and you were pissed at me for scaring the victim? It saved her life. Our focus is on the Gallagher family. Chuck, Andy, and Becky."

"If they're hurting him," Dean said, then shook his head.

"It doesn't matter," Cas said, ignoring the way Dean flinched at the thought. All of them knew exactly what had been done to Benny, and Cas had no doubt they were about to walk in on much the same thing. "If I have to tie the both of you up and leave you here while I go in and save Sam, I will, because it'll mean Sam gets out alive. You two have to be ready to find Sam in pain and experiencing everything the Gallagher family did to Benny and more."

"I thought they wanted Benny and just took Sam because he was in Benny's house," Dean said, frowning.

"We don't know that," Cas said. "We have to assume they took Sam for the same reason they took Benny. Don't focus on what they're doing or Sam's condition. Focus on the Gallaghers."

"I don't think Becky would hesitate to kill him if she knew we were going to take him," Jess said.

"She's right," Cas said, watching as the information settled in Dean's head. It was obvious Dean didn't like it, but if it would save Sam, he would do it. "Let me take lead on this. The first Gallagher each of us encounters, we need to subdue, but we need to do it carefully because they're a family and very close. They'll kill us without a second thought."

"Okay," Dean said, determination in his tone of voice, "so how's this gonna go?"

Twenty minutes later, Cas was breaking into the only room of the house that wasn't lit up by house lights. It was in the back of the house, and even though the window had locks, Cas was able to get in without causing much noise.

Jess and Dean were at the back fence, standing in the bushes. Cas gave them a signal to wait two minutes before following him in, then he turned and headed for the door.

The room was carpeted, and there were stuffed animals on nearly every surface. A full-sized bed was against the wall to his left, a nightstand on either side. In the dim light coming through the window, Cas could see giant hearts on the walls, either cut-outs or painted directly on the walls. The bed had more pillows than was really necessary, and the blankets were rumpled.

It had to be Becky's room. The way Jess described her, she had never really grown up, and it looked like a tween girl's room. Something had stunted her emotional growth, and Cas had a theory as to why, but it didn't matter. Nothing would matter once she was dead.

Cas put a hand on the doorknob and started to turn it when he heard a snuffling. He turned and saw someone moving in the bed. It took him a moment to realize it wasn't Becky, but rather it was a child. Cas couldn't tell whether it was a boy or a girl because the room too dark, but the child rubbed their eyes, turned over, and went back to sleep, never paying any attention to Cas.

Cas pulled out his cell phone and texted Dean, letting him know the room had a sleeping child in it before he put it back in his pocket and opened the door.

A television was blaring in the family room at the front of the house, and in the back where Cas was, there were two more bedrooms and a bathroom, empty but all fully lit up, and it appeared everybody in the house liked having the lights on whether they were using the rooms or not.

Nobody was watching the television, so Cas made his way toward the kitchen. The family was sitting around the table, having a late dinner. They didn't see or hear him in the hallway, too busy shoving food in their faces and the television covering up any other sounds.

The father, Chuck, was sitting at the head of the table. He had his head down and was cutting up a steak. Becky's back was to Cas, Andy sitting across from her, but Andy was too interested in his own food to see Cas peeking around the corner. 

Cas remembered the basement had windows at the back of the house, and since he couldn't make it to the basement door off the kitchen without being noticed, he crept down the hallway and back out the window in the child's room.

Dean and Jess were halfway across the yard, but Cas waved them back, then crouched down in front of one of the basement windows. He pulled out a roll of masking tape, made an X on one of the pieces of glass, then hit it with his fist just hard enough to break the glass, but not so hard that it dropped down into the basement, before pulling on the tape, the glass coming neatly out of the frame. He dropped the glass to his right on the grass, then reached around, unlocked the window, and opened it. It was a tight fit, but he slid in through the open window before lowering himself to the basement floor.

There were night lights in the basement, an overstuffed chair in the corner with pillows on and around it that appeared to be straight out of the nineteen-seventies with a burnt orange color, a blanket draped over the back of it. Cas turned and saw the mattress on the floor to his left, pushed against a wall. Sam was in the middle, naked and gagged, his wrists tied behind his back.

Sam was looking directly at Cas, breathing heavily through his nose, nostrils flaring, eyes wide. Cas crouched down next to Sam, putting a hand on his shoulder.

"I'm not going to untie you," Cas whispered. "You're going to stay put while I lure them down here."

Sam shook his head no, letting out a small noise of distress, but Cas pet his arm, trying to calm him down. It felt awkward, but sometimes petting worked on Dean, so he hoped it worked on Sam too.

"There's three of them, and I need to catch them off guard," Cas said. "If they come down here, they'll be focused on you."

Sam squeezed his eyes shut, not at all happy with the idea, but he forced himself to calm down, opened his eyes, and nodded.

"I'm going to do everything I can to get you out of here," Cas said, "but you have to play along, and keep your eyes on them, not me."

Sam nodded, glancing at the stairs. He put his head down on the mattress and started to control his breathing, using techniques Cas was sure Mary and John had taught him.

Cas gave Sam's shoulder one last pat, then walked over to the stairs and kicked the bottom step, a loud thump that the Gallaghers were sure to hear. He backed into a corner by the stairs and waited, grabbing a pipe from the floor, where he found several pieces of wood and other building supplies. The pipe was heavy and about two and a half feet long. It wasn't the best weapon, but it was enough, and Cas still had his knife in his pocket if he needed it.

The door opened at the top of the stairs, and someone started coming down. "What're you up to down here, Sammy-poo?" It was a woman's voice, and just as she made it to the bottom step, the child started crying upstairs.

"I'll check on him," someone said from the top of the stairs.

"Thanks, Andy," Becky called out.

"Is he makin' a fuss?" someone else said, their boots heavy on the stairs as they came down.

"He's a bit restless, Daddy," Becky said, sighing unhappily.

Chuck was halfway down the stairs, and he leaned over the railing. Cas held the pipe in his right hand, waiting for just the right moment.

"Did you miss me, Sam?" Becky asked as she flopped down onto the bed, running her fingers through Sam's hair.

"He still tied up, Princess?" Chuck asked.

"Yeah," Becky said, "he must've just been lonely. But that's okay, because we're here now."

Cas waited patiently as Chuck came down the stairs, a fond smile on his face as he watched his daughter running her hands over Sam's body. Sam didn't try to pull away and he kept his eyes on Becky, just like Cas had told him.

"Maybe it's time to play again," Becky said, then looked up at Chuck. "Daddy I wanna play again."

"Anytime, Princess," Chuck said as he walked up to the end of the dirty bed.

Cas stepped forward and brought the pipe down on Chuck's head. Becky screamed as the child upstairs started crying again, Andy yelling and cursing up a storm. Chuck fell to his knees, but grabbed a hold of Cas' clothes as he went, pulling Cas down with him.

Chuck was stronger than he looked, and his reaction time was very good. Cas had no doubt the man was a Marine as soon Cas was struggling to pull himself out of a choke hold. He didn't know where Becky was, but he couldn't worry about her or what she would do to him or Sam. He needed to get the upper hand on Chuck.

Cas let Chuck pull him back, let him wrap his left arm around Cas' upper body and his right around Cas' neck, and he used the brief second afterward to relax, confusing Chuck enough that he was surprised when Cas threw his head back and caught him in the face.

Chuck was dazed, but it didn't put him out of the fight, and as Cas got to his knees, bringing the pipe down again, Chuck rolled away, the pipe hitting the concrete floor and sending a shock of pain through Cas' arm. Cas grunted, but surged forward, lunging at Chuck and sending the man sprawling toward the wall, his head hitting it hard.

Cas' body hit the wall too, and even though it hurt, he didn't stop. He hit Chuck in the neck with the pipe, then cracked it down over his upper back. Chuck went down, too many injuries having happened in quick succession for his body to keep going, and Cas rolled the man onto his back, then pushed the pipe across his throat, using both hands to crush his windpipe.

Chuck's eyes widened, and his mouth gaped, trying to breathe, pupils uneven after the repeated blows to the head, the tiny blood vessels in his eyes bursting. Chuck reached up and tried to claw at Cas, but it was too late, and soon his hands fell to the floor, limp and useless as the life drained from him, eyes glassy and his body shivering one last time as the nerves and other bodily functions got the message that he was dead.

"No!" Becky screamed, enraged.

Cas turned, ready to take her down, but smiled when he saw Sam had her under him. He wasn't sure how or when Sam had done it, but Becky was struggling, snarling in his face, nails raking lines of red down his arms, face, and neck, but Sam wasn't budging, wrists still tied behind his back.

As Cas crawled onto the bed, he reached into his right pocket, finding one of the syringes broken, having leaked out into his jeans during the scuffle, but there were still two syringes intact, and he pulled one out and uncapped it before pushing it into Becky's neck and giving her a large dose of the sedative.

After untying Sam and taking his gag off, they went upstairs, Sam carrying Becky over his shoulder and only a little wobbly after all the time tied up in the basement. Cas found Jess standing outside the bathroom door in the hallway.

"Andy's in there," Jess said, gesturing toward the door. "He's a little worse for wear, but I didn't have anything on me to tie him up."

Cas nodded, giving her a smile. "Good. You did good."

"Hell yeah, I did!" she said, then caught sight of Sam, a smile breaking out on her face. "And you saved my husband!" she said as she wrapped her arms around Sam's middle and hugged him tightly, kissing his neck and whispering that she had missed him, that she was so happy he was okay, and that she knew they would find him.

"I knew you'd find me too," Sam said, gazing down at his wife, a smile on his face, Becky's limp body slung over his left shoulder.

"Sammy!" Dean said from the doorway to the child's bedroom.

"Hey," Sam said, then grunted as Dean hugged him, wrapping his right arm around Jess and Sam, his left arm occupied by a boy who appeared no more than three years old.

"We need to get out of here," Cas said. "Take Becky and Andy to the SUV. Use this on Andy." He held up one of the syringes.

Dean took the syringe from Cas. "What are you going to do?"

Cas nodded at the child. "Give me the boy."

Dean turned his right shoulder toward Cas, the boy partially shielded by his body. "No. We're taking him with us."

The boy looked up at Cas. "I want my blankie." He was tired, and his hair was sticking up all over the place.

"Give him to me," Cas said.

Dean took a step back. "No. You're not hurting him. I don't care what Benny said."

Cas glared at Dean, then walked up to him, ignoring the way Dean turned the child even further away from him, trying to protect the boy.

"I'm not going to hurt him," Cas said, shaking his head. "I don't handle children well, especially when they cry. It's a long drive back home, and if we don't have his blankie and any other special toys he insists upon having with him, he's going to cry until I have no choice but to sedate him, and I'll have a fight on my hands because none of you are going to agree to that."

"Oh," Dean said, body relaxing from his protective stance as he realized Cas wasn't going to kill the boy. "I can do that. I'm good with kids, and the two of us can get his stuff, right Benji?"

Cas looked to the boy, who smiled at Dean and cupped the man's face with small hands, nodding, his legs kicking as if he wanted to run into his room already.

"Yeah," Benji said, then pointed toward his room. "Jack! I want Jack!"

"Okay, buddy, we'll go get Jack," Dean said, handing the syringe back to Cas as he brushed by him, taking Benji into his room.

"Chuck's clothing is small, but you should be able to find something," Cas said to Sam, who was still completely naked. "His room is at the end of the hallway. I'll take Becky out to the SUV."

Sam transferred Becky to Cas, then walked down the hallway and went into Chuck's bedroom.

"I'll keep an eye on Andy," Jess said, taking up her post outside the bathroom once again.

"Thank you," Cas said, then walked out to the SUV. By the time he got back, Dean had a diaper bag packed, and he had taken the boy out to the kitchen, where they were gathering snacks for the road.

Jess stepped aside as Cas went into the bathroom. Andy was bleeding from a gash on his forehead, his bottom lip was swollen, and his left arm was at an awkward angle as he held it close to his chest.

"Get the fuck away from me!" Andy said, pushing himself against the wall, wincing as his arm was jostled.

Cas kneeled down and easily emptied the syringe into the man's neck, Andy far too battered to put up a fight. He slumped, and Cas hefted him over his left shoulder, then headed out to the SUV again, not concerned at all about the man's broken arm, though very impressed at the damage Jess had done.

"We're ready to go for a ride," Dean said, Benji on his left hip, Jess and Sam on either side of him.

"Where we goin'?" Benji asked.

Cas sighed as he climbed into the SUV, starting it while everyone else piled in, Dean in the back seat with Benji and Jess, Sam in the front passenger seat, giving the other three more room in the back. Jess was behind Sam, and as they drove away, she reached forward and rested her hand on his shoulder, needing that connection after nearly losing her husband.


	11. Chapter 11

Benji was asleep on Dean as they got off the freeway, and Cas knew he had to say something. They were close to the house.

"We have to give him to the CON," Cas said.

"Cas," Dean started, but Cas shook his head.

"Benny's been traumatized twice now," Cas said, turning a corner and stopping at a light. "There's a good chance he's going to lose his house, and he doesn't have a job right now. He has no family, no friends to help him, and this is a terrible time in his life to have a child dropped onto his lap."

"It's his kid," Jess said gently. "You have to at least give him the option."

"No, I really don't," Cas said, the tension inside the vehicle nearly palpable. "Giving the child to the CON would be better for Benny _and_ the child. Benny's not in a position to be a good father right now. The CON will allow him visitation if he wants it, and once he gets back on his feet, they'll work with him on transitioning to full custody. If he doesn't want anything to do with the child, then he'll never even have to see him."

Everyone was quiet, and Cas checked on Dean a few times in the rear view mirror. Cas wasn't sure if they were going to fight him on it, but the silence told him that they knew he was right, even if they didn't like it.

He pulled into the driveway, and everyone got out, Dean careful with the boy so he didn't wake him. Jess took the diaper bag while Sam carried Andy to the kill room.

"Dean, wait!" Cas said, realizing too late that the extremely stubborn man he had been sharing a home with was charging into the house, ready to devastate Benny. Cas hurried to catch up, but by the time he made it to the living room, Benny was standing up, eyes wide, mouth open as he stared at his son. "Dean, go into the kitchen while I have a word with Benny."

"Stop," Benny said as Dean started to turn. He ran a hand over his face and leaned back against the wall, taking a few breaths before turning to Cas. "I told you not to fuckin' do this."

"I know," Cas said. "I apologize. We'll have the CON pick him up. They'll take care of him."

Benny shook his head. "Fuck you," he said, then shook his head again. "Fuck you."

Dean didn't seem the least bit sorry, and in fact as Benny continued to quietly freak the fuck out, Dean moved closer. "His name's Benji," he said as the boy woke up and rubbed his eyes.

"Dean," Cas said, warning tone to his voice.

"Fuck," Benny breathed, looking away as he desperately tried to process it all. "Couldn't even come up with a better fuckin' name?" he said, then chuckled, shaking his head. "You don't even know he's mine."

Cas nearly laughed out loud. The boy was the spitting image of his father. Bright blue eyes, brown hair, and even the same nose as his father, albeit much smaller on his little face.

"You don't have to take him," Cas said. "The CON can take him. They can place him."

Benny winced, then looked at the boy. "Does he know?"

Sam cleared his throat from the doorway. "They completely isolated him from what they did. The basement was soundproofed, and when Benji did see me that first day, they told him they were playing a game, and they forced me to laugh so he wouldn't know anything was wrong. He's been loved and cared for, and he knows nothing about what else went on."

"Wanna say hi, Benji?" Dean asked the boy.

"Hi," Benji said, waving at Benny and smiling.

"Show him your favorite toy," Dean said, holding up a stuffed octopus. It was brightly colored, and one of the tentacles was a little ragged and dirty, which made sense when Benji pushed it into his mouth and chewed on it for a moment before thrusting the toy toward Benny.

"Ocha'puss," Benji said proudly.

"Does your octopus have a name?" Benny asked, voice a little shaky.

Benji frowned at Benny. "Ocha'puss!" he said indignantly.

Benny chuckled. "I'm sorry. Ocha'puss is a very nice name. What can Ocha'puss do? Does he know any tricks?"

"Yeah," Benji said, nodding.

Benny turned to Cas. "Tell the CON I need help with this, but they're not taking him."

Cas shook his head. "Benny, you don't have to-"

"I know," Benny said, holding his hands up. "I know this is insane and huge and I don't even know what the hell I'm gettin' into, but," he said, shaking his head and looking at the boy again, "I can't send 'im away. Can't do that to 'im. I've gotta step up."

"You could start with visitations," Sam said gently, and Cas let him because tact wasn't his forte.

"No," Benny said. "His life's already gonna be turned upside down. He doesn't need it to happen more than once, and he doesn't deserve to be tossed about, not knowin' where he belongs."

"Wanna see him jump?" Benji asked, holding his octopus up.

Benny smiled. "Yeah, I wanna see that, kiddo."

Dean set the boy down on the floor and Benji grabbed Benny by the hand, pulling him over to the couch and telling him to sit down before showing him all the tricks his octopus could do, including hitting himself with his own tentacles and falling off the coffee table in various ways, but bouncing back each and every single time.

"Cas?" Dean said softly, keeping his distance. "We okay?"

Cas turned and walked into the kitchen, then out the back door. Dean didn't follow him, and Cas felt the relief bleed from his body as he headed for his kill room. He didn't want to deal with Dean. Wasn't ready.

"Cas?"

Cas stopped halfway between the house and his kill room, shoulders hiking up in annoyance. "What, Sam?" he asked through clenched teeth.

"I want to help," Sam said from the back porch.

"No," Cas said, walking up to the kill room and through the door. Before he could close it, Sam was there, pushing the door open again. "I said no."

"They didn't really hurt me," Sam said. "It's not revenge. I just want to help, and I think I can do it because they talked around me. Said things that I think could help. Between what you know from Benny and what I heard and saw, I think we could do this right."

"No," Cas said, shaking his head. "You're not a Cleaner. You're not even a Handler. You're not cut out for this. Victims don't-"

"I'm not a victim," Sam said, almost snarling the words, chest puffing out.

"No?" Cas asked, a smirk tugging at the corners of his mouth.

"No, I'm not," Sam said.

Cas reached out and grabbed a handful of Sam's hair, catching him off guard and throwing him into the room, slamming the door shut behind him. Sam went to his knees with a grunt, reaching up to try and pry Cas' fingers away, but Cas shoved him again, sending him down to the floor, flat on his belly.

Sam didn't fight him, and Cas rolled him over, straddling his hips and pushing his wrists against the floor. Sam's eyes were wide, and he was already panting in fear. Sam was pretty when he was scared.

"I said no, but if you insist," Cas said, then reached into his pocket and pulled out a switchblade, hitting the button to release the blade and letting it flick out so close to Sam's chin that the tip brushed against his skin, making Sam flinch.

Sam opened his mouth, ready to beg or explain or whatever the fuck he thought would help, but Cas was running out of patience.

"Shut the fuck up," Cas hissed in Sam's face, pushing the dull side of the blade against his throat. "You think you can just decide what you want to do and I'll let you do it? You think just because I let your brother into my home, I've softened and you can breeze in here and become a temporary apprentice?"

"N-no," Sam said, breathing shallow as he held his head very still, the tip of the blade a painful reminder to be careful.

"I could kill you right here, right now, and no one would know until it was done and over with," Cas said. "I could carve you up, make you scream and cry, and nobody would rescue you."

"I'm sorry," Sam said, wincing as the blade nicked is chin. "I'm s-sorry, Cas. I was out of line."

"Your brother sometimes ignores what I am," Cas said, letting out a huff of laughter. "I thought you had enough sense to be careful. I was wrong."

Cas climbed off Sam, grabbing a hold of his hair again and yanking him toward the table, where Becky was unconscious and waiting for him, tied up and still clothed. Sam stood up, bending over when Cas pushed his head down, nearly shoving his face into Becky's belly.

"This woman killed men," Cas said, "but she's also the mother of that child in the house. Benny's child. In order to properly punish her and remove her from society, I'm going to torture her until she can't even remember her own name. I'm going to cut her and shock her with electricity inside and out. I'm going to make her beg for death, and by the time I'm done with her, she'll be nothing but open wounds."

Sam squeezed his eyes shut, his jaw clenched and his hands gripping the edge of the table so tightly his knuckles were white.

"Are you going to help me do that, Sam?" Cas asked, pulling Sam's head back, then smacking it against Becky's chest, rubbing his face over her breasts. "Are you going to watch? Are you going to join in? Maybe slice her stomach open? Rip her nipples off? Shock her with electricity until she passes out? Keep hurting her while she screams?"

"No, I'm sorry!" Sam said, voice cracking as he tried to pull away.

"I'm going to let her brother watch everything," Cas said. "He's not nearly as insane as she is, and he was more cognizant of everything they did, so I'm going to make him watch it all. Once I'm done with her and she's bled out, I'm going to shove her off the table onto the floor, put him up on the table where I killed his sister, and do to him every single thing I've done to her only slower."

"Stop! Please, stop!" Sam cried out, knees buckling.

"No, you said you wanted to help," Cas said, letting out a huff of laughter. "You're not a victim, and you're going to assist a Cleaner."

Cas let Sam go to his knees on the floor, shoulders hunched as he stared at the legs of the table, shivering.

"You may be able to fool the people in the house," Cas said, crouching beside Sam and whispering, "but I know this whole thing freaked you out. Maybe the Gallaghers didn't have a chance to do anything to you yet like they did to Benny, but trying to convince me you're not a victim was a fucking lie."

Sam shook his head, not really denying it so much as just not ready to admit it. Cas grabbed his chin and forced him to look up at him.

"If you ever even _think_ about lying to me again," Cas said, voice low, "you're going to find out exactly how much I enjoy my job. Exactly how different I am from all those people you work with every day."

Sam gasped as Cas pushed Sam's hand against his crotch, allowing him to feel how hard he was.

"The more I hurt you," Cas whispered, "the harder I'd come."

Sam didn't try to pull away, didn't drop his eyes from Cas' gaze, and the shallow little breaths only made Cas harder. Sam's eyes welled up with tears, but he didn't beg, and he didn't try to stop Cas. He just stayed where he was, accepting of whatever Cas was going to do.

Cas let go of Sam's chin and reached down to cup his crotch, not surprised when he found it wet with cooling urine, his cock not hard at all.

"This?" Cas said as he motioned to the table with his chin. "That's not you. You think killing them will empower you or give you some closure, but it'll only fuck with your head."

Sam nodded shakily. "Sorry," he whispered.

"Now get out of my kill room before I decide to see how hard I can make you scream," Cas said, letting go of Sam and standing up.

Sam slowly got up and walked out of the kill room, quiet and in shock. Cas figured Dean would be pissed when he found out, and so would Jess, but Sam crossed a line, and Cas was having none of it. If they were to back away and take a look at the big picture, they would thank him. Sam may not have been as naive to the darkness as a lot of people out there, but he certainly wasn't a killer, and even being in Cas' kill room while Cas did his job would have changed him. It would not have been pretty.

Cas tied Andy up more securely and chained him to the far wall, giving him a nice view of the table while not allowing him to get close to the cabinets or the table. Once he was satisfied with Andy's positioning, Cas stripped Becky and tied her down with straps, then he set up his rolling cart.

Andy and Becky were still completely sedated, Cas having pulled over partway through the trip to give them more sedative, otherwise they would have awakened on the way home. With the added sedative, they would sleep for a little while longer.

Cas had some time to kill, and he knew just what he needed to do. He locked up the kill room and went into the house. Dean was standing in the kitchen, and when Cas walked in, he backed up a step, ducking his head as Cas walked by. Sam was in the living room, standing by the front door and talking with Jess.

"Where's Benny?" Cas asked.

"Benji was tired," Jess said, and unless Cas was mistaken, she was pissed. Perhaps Sam was telling her what Cas had done to him. "I told Benny he'd probably sleep well tonight if he gave him a bath, then put him to bed."

"They can't stay here," Cas said. His home wasn't a hotel, no matter who needed a bed to sleep in.

"We already contacted the CON," Jess said, holding her hands up in a calming gesture. "They're going to a hotel tonight. Room's all paid for, including meals. They can stay there a week while the CON gets the house fixed up and helps Benny find a job. They're going to set him up with counseling and help him find a babysitter too."

Just as Cas was about to ask when they would be coming, the doorbell rang, and the next few minutes were a flurry of Benny getting Benji ready to go, the case worker from the CON helping them and getting information, and then packing Benny and Benji into the car, both of them waving and Benny thanking all of them.

After Jess waved goodbye and closed the door, she turned to Cas. "All set."

"Good," Cas said, nodding. "I need to get started on Becky and Andy, but I need to do something with the two of them first," he said, gesturing toward Sam and Dean.

"Why?" Sam asked, eyes a little too wide. He was scared, and it made Cas' cock ache.

Cas turned his attention on Sam, weight shifted forward in a way he knew intimidated even the biggest of men. "Because you, me, and Dean need to discuss some things. I want to focus on the Gallaghers tonight, but as Dean can attest to, I'm not the type to let things fester. I'm unhappy with your behavior in the kill room, and Dean took it upon himself to completely ignore my instructions regarding Benny and his child. I'll deal with both of you tomorrow."

"What are you going to do?" Sam asked, taking a step backward.

"Cas," Jess said softly.

Dean complained about Sam's hair on more than one occasion. He talked about how it was too long, easy for somebody to grab. It was true, and Cas took full advantage. He was quick, hand darting out to grab a chunk. Sam yelped just as Dean took a step toward Cas.

"Cas!" Dean said, but froze when Cas pulled his switchblade out and held it at Sam's neck. "Whoa, whoa! Hold on a minute!"

Cas glanced at Jess and was pleased to see she wasn't actively trying to stop him. "The both of you compromised me. Both of you!"

"Okay, but that's not reason to kill him!" Dean said, eyes wide.

"Do I really need a good reason?" Cas asked, then chuckled. "I don't need a reason. I'm a serial killer. I kill people. Especially people who get in my way, and tonight both of you did. Sam stumbled into my kill room while I had two kills in there. Had they been awake, he would've endangered the both of us and destroyed my credibility. This is my job, not a group activity or something fun to do as a family."

Dean blinked at him for a moment, then nodded. "Okay. I'm sorry."

"No you're not," Cas said, shaking his head. "You still think I'm wrong. Still think you're right. Still think I'm overreacting."

"No, I'm really sorry," Dean said, trying to focus his attention on Cas when all he wanted to do was pry the blade away from his brother's throat.

"Get down in the basement," Cas said, yanking Sam's head back and making the man hiss in pain.

"What?" Dean asked, frowning with confusion.

"Walk to the basement door," Cas drawled, "open the basement door, walk down the steps, and stand in the middle of the basement."

"What are you going to do?" Dean asked.

"If I have to tell you again, you're going to have to patch Sam up once you're down there," Cas said, poking the tip of the blade into Sam's throat just a bit.

"Ah!" Sam cried out, then a small bead of blood ran down his throat.

"Don't hurt him!" Dean said, holding his hands up in surrender.

"Cas? Can I make a suggestion?" Jess asked.

"Yes," Cas said, nodding. It was obvious she wasn't trying to flat out stop him, so he would listen to her.

"How about I take the guys home tonight so you can have fun with Andy and Becky?" she asked. "It'll relax you, and you don't have to worry about them."

"I won't have to worry about them if they're in the basement," Cas said, shrugging.

"I didn't say you couldn't put them in there," Jess said, and even though Cas knew she was using skills she learned over the years as a Handler, he let her handle him. "I'm saying that having them here will distract you, so you won't be able to fully enjoy Andy and Becky. I'm offering to take them home, get them out of your hair. I'll bring them back tomorrow for a discussion."

Cas sighed, then nodded. "That sounds good," he said, more than ready to play with the siblings in his kill room. If Jess could take care of the siblings in his living room, then who was he to argue. "Inform the CON about the dead body in the Gallagher's basement as well as what I'm doing to the remaining members of the family. I'll text you in the morning once I've gotten some sleep, then I'd like the three of you to come back here."

"Okay," Jess said, nodding, "we'll see you in the morning." She turned and pushed her husband toward the front door, in a hurry to get them away from Cas. "Let's go, guys."

Dean didn't say anything to him, instead brushing by and walking out the front door. Cas wasn't sure if Dean was pissed or scared about what would happen the next morning, but he didn't have to wonder at all about Sam. Not with the wide eyes and the way he was all too ready to leave.

Jess didn't say anything else as Dean stormed out front, she just pushed her husband out the door and closed it behind them. Cas groaned, rubbing his eyes before he locked the front door and headed out to his kill room. It would relax him, and it was a treat to work on not one, but two people. The fact that they were siblings only made it better.


	12. Chapter 12

Becky was awake and had been for a few minutes, but Andy was just starting to breathe a bit heavier, coming out of his deep sleep. Becky struggled, trying to wiggle her way free, but when she saw Cas, she snarled.

"What did you do to Daddy?" she nearly screamed at him, fierce and ready to attack even though she couldn't do a damn thing to him.

"Daddy's dead," Cas said.

"No, you're lying," she said, lips curling into a smirk. "Daddy's so much smarter than you, and you're just trying to scare me. Daddy's fine, and he's on his way here to kill you."

Andy groaned through the gag, finally waking up and not at all happy about the situation. He yelled, but Cas couldn't really tell what he was saying. Not with the sock in his mouth and the ball gag tied around his head, shoving the sock in even further.

"I crushed his windpipe," Cas said, then held up the pipe he had used. "You saw me do it."

"No, you just choked him until he passed out," Becky said, smiling. "You were stupid to have left him behind. He's fine, other than a sore throat, and he's coming for you."

"You can believe whatever you want to believe," Cas said as he set the pipe down on the counter top to his left. He wasn't going to use it on either of them. It wasn't one of the tools they used on their victims.

"Daddy's coming," Becky said, grinning at him as he picked up a switchblade.

It wasn't the one he normally kept in his pocket. It was a little duller, and he kept it for special occasions, the part of the blade closest to the handle serrated and very painful, unlike the one in his pocket which was sharp and not serrated and wouldn't hurt much at all, yet would do so much damage.

"Do you know what I am?" Cas asked.

Becky rolled her eyes. "Of course I know what you are. You're going to punish me for being a bad girl," she said, then giggled. "But I know something you don't."

Cas ran the blade over the skin between her breasts. "What's that?" he asked.

"Come closer," she said, voice softer.

"This close?" Cas asked as he leaned in and pushed the tip of his blade under her chin, a thin trail of blood running down her neck.

Her eyes were wide with manic intensity. "My little brother is double jointed," she whispered.

Cas pulled back, but it was too late. Something hit him in the side of the head, and he fell to his knees. He tried to turn, tried to strike out at Andy, but his body wasn't obeying him, and he realized Andy had hit him hard enough he was going to lose consciousness if he didn't push himself through it.

It wasn't the first time he had been hit in the head by someone he was Cleaning. He knew not to panic, and he forced his eyes open, but another blow, this time to his neck, sent him to the floor, his vision growing dim. The last thing he saw was Andy's smiling face.

Cas woke to pain. He hurt everywhere, including an ache in his left shoulder, causing his breath to catch in his chest. He blinked into the light, not all that reassured when he saw he was still in his kill room. Wincing, he tested the ropes binding his wrists behind his back. He was sitting on a chair he usually kept in the chemicals closet, and he could see Becky playing with his smelling salts, breaking open the packets and tossing them into the corner, the smell of ammonia tickling his nose.

Andy was sitting on the table in the center of the room, swinging his legs and smirking at Cas. He held up Cas' phone with his good hand, the broken arm tucked against his body.

"Who do I call to get Benji back?" Andy asked, waving the phone back and forth.

"One Life in my contacts," Cas said.

Andy frowned. "What does that get me?"

"It gets you the director at the CON," Cas said.

Andy chuckled. "I knew you Cleaners didn't care about people all that much, but you'd give the kid up that easily?"

"I don't care about the child," Cas said, shrugging, the pain stabbing through his shoulder and neck and making his cock twitch. "I don't care about Benny either, and I'm sure your sister wants him back. Benny's the only one who has given her a child."

Andy smiled. "Yeah, she thinks she's in love with him," he whispered, sending a fond glance toward his sister, who was still playing with the smelling salts as she walked into the laundry room. "So you really don't care?"

"No," Cas said, and it was easy to appear apathetic when he really was. "Call the number, tell them Agent Novak needs a location on Benjamin Lafitte. They'll ask you for a pass code, but tell them there isn't one."

Andy pointed at Cas. "If this is a trick-"

"It's not," Cas said, shaking his head. "I couldn't care less about the man or his child. I was in this to kill you and your family. It appears that's no longer an option, so I'm giving you the information needed to get you the fuck out of my house."

"What makes you think I won't kill you before we leave?" Andy asked, smirking.

Cas chuckled. "Because I'm the only one who knows where your Daddy is right now."

Andy's smirk dropped so fast Cas almost laughed. "What do you mean?"

"I lied to your sister," Cas said, nodding toward her. "I didn't kill your dad. I stashed him somewhere between here and Las Vegas. He won't make it more than forty-eight hours. He'll run out of oxygen."

Andy visibly forced himself to remain calm, his teeth clenched as he took a deep breath and slowly let it out. "I know where your boyfriend's family lives. I'll just go take one of them and make them tell me where he is."

Cas shook his head. "They don't know exactly where he is. The place I stashed him has way too many hiding places, and he's not even in the front of one of the many, many large storage units. It would take you days to find him, and by then he'd be dead."

Andy nodded. "Okay, you win. How do we do this?"

"Call the CON, tell them you need Benny's location," Cas said, clenching and unclenching his fists, hoping to give himself some play in the bindings. "Then you're going to take Benny and the kid with you, but don't go back to your house. The CON knows where you live, and they're currently combing through everything. I don't care where you go, but this time tomorrow you need to have opened a Gmail account with the name chuckgallagherisgoingtodietoday at Gmail dot com. That's all one word."

"How do I know you'll send the information?" Andy asked.

"You won't," Cas said, shrugging.

Andy looked down at the floor in front of Cas, working through everything in his head. He couldn't kill Cas, not with his father stowed someplace nobody else knew about.

"What if I decide to take you with us?" Andy asked.

"All three of you and Benji will be dead by tomorrow night," Cas said.

Andy's eyes widened just a bit, but he finally nodded. "O-okay," he said, then scrolled through the contacts in Cas' phone.

They had destroyed his cell phone, but neither of them had suspected he had another cell phone in his cabinets. They left him tied up on the chair, lip bleeding, his left shoulder dislocated, and bruises that were blossoming over his thighs, back, and stomach.

Cas tipped the chair over, falling on his left side so he only damaged what was already dislocated instead of risking a dislocation of his right shoulder too. He yelped in pain, the combination of endorphines, pain, and the stress of the last few days getting to him and his vision started to go black.

He forced his eyes open, breathing slowly and concentrating on his own body, and finally he was able to roll onto his knees, the blackness receding. Instead of trying to keep himself upright, he crawled, the top of his head sliding over the floor. It took a lot longer than he thought it would to scrape his head across the floor, his head getting sore and his left arm throbbing.

Because of his occupation, Cas had hidden weapons throughout his house, and he planned for situations where he would be tied up both inside his house and in his kill room. He pushed himself into the laundry room, then rolled onto his left side by the cabinet next to the washer and drier, using the sharpened back corner of the cabinet to cut through the rope.

Every move he made sent spikes of pain through his arm, shoulder, and neck, and by the time he finally sliced through the bindings, he was sweating, his cock hard and leaking.

He gave himself a moment to catch his breath, then pulled the knife out from under the cabinet that had been taped there years ago. It was only the second time he had to pull it out. He used it to cut through the rope around his ankles, then grabbed the cell phone out of his cabinet and called One Life again.

"Hey, Jody," Cas said, wiping the sweat out of his eyes.

"Hey, there," she said, a smile evident in her tone of voice.

"They're mine."

"As if I'd keep them for myself," she said, chuckling. "If you're fit to drive, you can pick them up any time. The boy's arm and leg are broken, and the girl has a new gash in her forehead, but they're ready and waiting for you."

"Thank you, Jody," Cas said.

Jody tsked. "You don't have to thank me. I'm happy to play with a couple of snot-nosed kids."

Cas smiled. He liked Jody, and he was certain she had done more to Andy and Becky than was really necessary to subdue them. "I'll be there in ten to twenty minutes."

"See ya then, sugar," Jody said before ending the call.

Cas pulled himself up off the floor, walked into his house and into the office, finding one of the biggest books on the shelving units. He took a few breaths, the book in his right hand as he prepared himself, then held his left hand out and set the book on his open left palm. His shoulder rolled, then thumped back into place with the weight of the book, the severe pain spiking, then stopping almost immediately, only a dull ache left behind, the orgasm that ripped through him helping to mute the pain but leaving him with wet and sticky boxers as he doubled over.

He dropped the book, then moved his arm around experimentally, making sure his shoulder was back in place, and when he was satisfied with the results, he grabbed his phone again. His breathing a little heavy with arousal.

"Cas?" Jess asked, voice tense. "Are you okay?"

"They escaped," Cas said as he went into his bedroom, "and we need to go pick them up." He pulled out a change of clothes, stripping out of the soiled clothes he had been wearing way too long. He used his discarded boxers to clean his dick and balls off.

"We can be there in just a few minutes," Jess said.

Dean was quiet, as were Sam and Jess. Cas was driving, having insisted upon it. All three of them had been surprised by Cas' appearance, and Cas wondered just how bad he looked. He probably needed a shower, and even though most of the bruises were under his clothes, he knew his split lip had bled onto his chin and neck, and his hair was still a little wet from sweating as he pushed himself across the kill room floor.

It was a quick drive to Jody's office, and when Cas walked in, Jody gave him a smile, then nodded toward the corner of the room, where Becky's head was still sluggishly bleeding. She had been hogtied and was crying.

Andy's leg was twisted awkwardly, but he was doing his best to stay still. Jody hadn't bothered to tie him up, and Cas knew it was because she would have rather he had tried something so she could have hurt him more. Andy was stupid enough to believe his father was alive and that Cas would send him to an actual CON office, but he wasn't a stranger to the look in someone's eyes when they were more than happy to kill just for the sake of killing.

"I didn't interrupt anything, did I?" Cas asked.

Jody shook her head as she sat up in her office chair, straightening her dark green button-down shirt. "No, I was doing some paperwork. It was fun to play with them. Thank you," she said, smiling.

"What is this place?" Sam asked from the doorway.

"Officially, it's a shipping center," Cas said. "Unofficially it's a place that offers supplies off the record, money laundering, storage with no questions asked, and killers for hire."

Sam gaped at him, eyes wide. "Why the fuck are you telling me this?!"

"You asked," Cas said, shrugging.

Jess hid her smile with a hand over her mouth as Dean cleared his throat and feigned interest in a piece of art on the wall. Every bit of art in the room was a forgery waiting to replace the real thing in a museum somewhere.

"We won't get raided," Jody said, sending a very pointed look Sam's way.

"Uhm, n-no," Sam said, shaking his head. "That won't be happening. At least not because of me."

"He's cute," Jody said to Cas. "Can I play with him?"

Cas chuckled as Sam took a step back and ran into the door jamb. Jess wrapped her right arm around her husband's middle, protective of him even though she wouldn't stand a chance against Jody. Although, Cas would like to see her try.

"He'll be a good boy," Jess said, "but he's mine. I'm the only one who gets to play with him."

Jody nodded. "Understood. Although I'd suggest a little cock and ball torture. He seems like he'd make some real pretty noises."

"He does," Jess said, smirking with a confidence that surprised Cas a little.

"I don't need to know any of this," Dean said, covering his ears.

Jody chuckled, clearly very amused. "Okay, get out of my office," she said, shooing them as she stood up and leaned against the corner of her desk. "I've got a client coming in soon, and if he catches even a whiff of CON agents, he'll take his money and never come back."

"Thanks, Jody," Cas said again, then hefted Andy onto his left shoulder, enjoying the scream of pain as Andy's leg was jostled, not to mention his arm.

"Dean, bring Becky, please," Cas said as he walked out of the office.

By the time they got back home, Cas was not in a good mood. Even the idea of dealing with Sam and Dean made his chest burn, and he didn't want them leaving either. Not this time.

Dean carried Becky to the kill room while Cas pulled Andy through the house and into the back yard by his elbow, both wrists zip-tied behind his back, courtesy of Cas' duffel from the SUV. The muffled screams from Andy as his leg thumped down each of the steps at the back of the house had Cas shivering with pleasure. His broken arm wrenched behind his back only added to the massive amount of pain the man was suffering.

Once they were secure, Cas turned to Dean and pushed him toward the door. "Get in the house, both of you," Cas said.

"I can take them home, Cas," Jess said, following them. She was keeping enough distance between them that she wouldn't annoy him, and her voice was an interesting mix of gentle but firm. It was her Handler voice.

"No, we're not doing that again," Cas said as he pushed Dean up the back stairs and into the kitchen.

"Wait, Cas," Dean said, turning around, but Cas shoved him against the counter top, Dean grunting in pain as his back hit the corner.

"Get down the stairs," Cas snarled in Dean's face.

"Cas," Jess started, but she didn't move. She knew better than to get in Cas' way. Sam's eyes were wide, and he appeared to be a little confused, but he did as he was told.

"You're going down there," Cas said to Dean. "If I have to hogtie you and throw you down the stairs, I will."

"Okay! Okay!" Dean said, holding his hands up in surrender. "I'm going!"

Cas turned to Jess as Dean walked through the basement doorway. "Do you have a problem with this or do I need to toss you down there too?" he asked her.

Jess shook her head. "No. I'm not going to try and stop you or help them get out."

Cas nodded, then started down the stairs behind Dean. He gave Dean one last push at the bottom of the stairs, and Dean grunted, catching himself before he ended up sprawled on the floor, Sam already in the middle of the basement.

Sam didn't appear overly scared, and Cas was a little disappointed, but the expression Sam _did_ have made up for it. He was resolved. He had already given in to the fact they were spending the night in the basement, shoulders hunched. His spirit wasn't broken by any means, but he had realized he didn't have a choice.

Dean, on the other hand, although not stupid, was really fucking stubborn, and as soon as he regained his footing, he headed straight for Cas.

"This is fucked up," Dean said, standing close enough Cas could feel the heat of his body in the cold basement. "There's no bathroom down here. No food. It's fucking cold!"

"Maybe next time you're about to disobey me," Cas said, voice low, "you'll remember this night."

He turned around, ignoring the stuttering rage as Dean cussed him out, and as he made it to the bottom of the stairs, he knew what was coming. He turned, catching Dean's side with his elbow and sending Dean to the floor, panting and holding his bruised ribs.

Cas flipped the light off as he left the basement, then locked the door. He knew Dean and Sam would try to get out, but they wouldn't make it out the window after they discovered it was electrified, and they wouldn't make it out the basement door after they found the steel core.

"Don't let them out," Cas said to Jess, who was standing in the kitchen.

She shook her head, keeping her distance just in case Cas lashed out. "I won't."

Cas nodded. "Good," he said, then started for the back door. He paused, hand on the knob. She was so unlike other Handlers he had met. Except for Dean. There was something about her that felt familiar, and he shrugged it off, then walked out the door. He would examine how much Dean and Jess had in common another time.

Becky was wriggling on the floor, trying to get free, but Cas didn't give her much time before he picked up his favorite knife and stabbed her in the stomach, plunging it deep inside her.

Becky's eyes widened, and she gasped, her lungs refusing to work for a moment as her body went limp with shock. He pulled the knife out, then picked her up and dropped her onto the table, strapping her down and cutting her clothes away.

"Daddy's dead," Cas said, as he put on a pair of gloves and his apron. "The CON already picked up his body. Now I get to play with the two of you."

Cas kicked Andy's broken leg, right at the knee, and Andy screamed so hard it ended in nothing but a gurgle, curling in on himself under the table. Becky whimpered, tears running down the sides of her face. She didn't say anything, and it was stark contrast to her behavior the first time she had been on Cas' table.

"D-don't hurt her," Andy begged. "She didn't know what she was doing."

Cas picked up the electric wand he made for Benny. "Oh, she didn't?" he asked, then frowned. "I'm sorry. I was under the impression she wanted a baby, and she was doing everything she could to get one, including raping men and killing them when they didn't get her pregnant."

"She just wanted a baby," Andy said, sniffling as fat tears rolled down his cheeks. "She'd had a few boyfriends, but they took advantage of her. They hurt her, and I had to kill them. After that, she couldn't stand being touched. Not like that. And she was so depressed she wouldn't come out of her room, so I had to do something. Daddy and I started bringing men home for her, tying them up so she felt safe."

"Your daddy and brother must love you very much," Cas said as he leaned over Becky and smiled at her. He turned the dial up halfway and touched the tip of the wand to her breast.

Becky whimpered, trying to pull away, the stomach wound bleeding sluggishly. It wouldn't kill her. Not for a long time. Andy tried to get up, but wasn't able to move very much with the broken leg, his right arm useless, and finally he flopped back down, panting and sniffling.

"Did you miss anatomy class in school?" Cas asked Becky. "As much as you wanted a baby, the reason it didn't work most of the time wasn't anybody's fault but your own. You see, when a mommy and a daddy want to make a baby, they have to fuck."

Becky closed her eyes, more tears falling. Andy shuffled around again under the table, but he stopped when Cas kicked him in the stomach. He coughed as he tried to catch his breath.

"Please don't hurt her," Andy said, voice strained. "I know you have to kill her, but don't... don't do _that_ to her. Please."

Cas turned the wand off, then set it on the table by Becky's right hip before leaning down and pushing Andy over onto his stomach, Andy screaming in pain as his broken limbs were crushed by his weight and ground down into the floor. Cas used his knife to slice through Andy's cargo pants and underwear, shredding the material and pushing it down.

"No! No, don't do this! Please," Andy yelled as Cas swapped the knife for the wand and pushed it between his ass cheeks. "No! No!"

Andy screamed so hard he lost his voice for a moment as Cas pushed the wand in with no lube and no prep. He put his boot down on the end of the wand, holding it in place only one third of the way inside the man, then stood up straight and turned the dial all the way up. Andy's screams made Cas' balls and cock ache, his dick hard and leaking in his boxer briefs.

He opened his jeans and pulled his cock out, leaving his apron down so the soft plastic slid over the head. Becky had gone into shock, and she was staring at the ceiling, eyes glassy, mouth open, drool running over her cheek. She was gone, and she wouldn't be any fun for Cas, so he grabbed his knife and plunged it into her chest, twisting it and destroying her heart, killing her much more quickly than she deserved.

She didn't scream. She didn't even cry or whimper. Blood pumped out of the wound and ran down onto the table as Andy continued screaming and Cas rocked against the table, his cock getting all the stimulation he needed.

As the last breath left Becky's lungs, Cas came, Andy's screams making him come so hard he doubled over, hands tight on the edge of the table as he fucked forward, cock sliding over the apron, his release dripping down the inside of the plastic.

Cas frowned when Andy's screams turned to gurgles, and he pulled the wand out, turning the box off as Andy convulsed on the floor. Cas turned him over, watching with a smile as Andy foamed at the mouth, face turning red, then blue as his body gave out.

Andy died with his eyes open, just like his sister, and Cas shoved them into body bags before stripping out of his clothes and washing down his kill room.

He was in bed less than forty-five minutes later, stroking himself to another orgasm with the vivid memory of Becky's blood pooling on the table and Andy's screams of pain. He pulled his T-shirt off and used it to mop up the jizz on his stomach and hand, then fell asleep before he even had a chance to check his messages, sleeping better than he had in weeks.


	13. Chapter 13

Cas woke from a good night's sleep, smelling coffee and bacon. He took his time shaving and pulling on some jeans and a worn gray T-shirt, and as he walked into the kitchen, he was greeted by Jess, who was making up a plate of food for him.

"How do you like your coffee?" she asked.

"I don't really like coffee," Cas said as he sat down.

"Oh, Dean said you did," Jess said, frowning.

"He puts a lot of shit in it, and...," Cas said, then sighed. "He's charming. He's a charming shit, and I hate coffee, but I drink it whenever he makes it for me."

Jess chuckled as she set their plates down. "Then what would you like with your breakfast?"

"Cranberry juice," Cas said. "I've got some in the fridge."

"Okay, that sounds good," she said, pulling two glasses out of the cupboard. "I think I'll have some with my coffee."

"I dilute it," Cas said. "Two parts water to one part cranberry juice. Bottled cranberry juice is too strong."

"That's okay," Jess said as she set the glasses down on the table and put the cranberry juice container away in the fridge. "Won't stop me from enjoying it."

Cas started in on his food as Jess sat down. He had never been alone with Jess before. Not really. He didn't know what she liked to talk about, and he found himself wanting to carry on a conversation with this woman who was not only a Handler, but Sam's wife and partner in life.

"So how did you and Sam meet?" Cas asked.

Jess looked up at him, thrown just a bit, but she recovered quickly and set her glass down. "Sam takes an interest in cases sometimes, and one of the things he's good at is pairing up cases with Cleaner-slash-Handler teams. He contacted me for a job. One he knew Ruby and I would be perfect for. There were a lot of details to go over, so we met at this hole-in-the-wall diner and sat there for hours going over this case."

Cas took a bite of his bacon, happy to find it cooked perfectly. Crispy and none of the fat left on it to squish around in his mouth. "He was so charming, you fell for him?"

Jess rolled her eyes. "He's charming, but he's not _that_ charming. He was cute and all, but I wasn't looking for a relationship back then, and I turned him down when he asked for another dinner date."

"And what, he wore you down by pestering you for a few weeks or months until you agreed?" Cas asked.

Jess shook her head. "No, he didn't. Being a Handler in a profession where the female-to-male ratio is very heavily slanted toward men, I'm used to guys hitting on me. I've gotten forceful with a few of them, and I always get my point across, even if it takes hurting them a little bit."

Cas smiled. "Good."

"But Sam didn't pursue me," Jess said, dipping her toast into the runny yolk of her egg. "He seemed disappointed at first, but he didn't give me a hard time. He let me have my space, threw me a few more cases, and each time we went over the cases, he kept it professional even though I caught him staring at me a few times. It really impressed me that he respected my wishes, so after the fourth case we went over, I told him I wanted him to take me out."

"They're not as different as you might think," Cas said, chuckling. "Dean wore me down, just like Sam did, by giving me enough space that I wouldn't beat the shit out of him or change Handlers, but still let me know he wanted me. If he would've pursued me in a strong way, it wouldn't have been good for his health."

Jess smiled, nodding. "Yeah, well, it worked on both of us," she said, then they ate in silence for a bit before she sat back in her seat and sighed. "Okay, so what are you going to do them? Can I let them out yet? Maybe take some food down?"

She pulled her feet up under her, sitting cross legged on the chair, no shoes or socks on. She was comfortable, and Cas didn't think he would like seeing someone get so comfortable in his home until he saw her settling in, and a small part of him liked it.

"Dean knew better than to do what he did, and so did Sam," Cas said, anger making his chest burn. "He and Sam both put me in awkward positions, and they should be thankful I didn't kill them both."

Jess gave him a small smile, and he recognized it. Had seen it on his own Handler's face before. It was the 'my Cleaner is feeling stabby and I need to be as agreeable as possible so he doesn't follow through on his stabby urges' smile.

"Dean cares so much," Jess said, voice soft and oh-so gentle. "I don't think he could've physically made himself do what you asked of him."

"Benny was in no position to take that child," Cas said, wondering why the fuck he cared at all. Benny was of no consequence to him, and if he ended up hurting his own child, Cas could pick him up and do his job by killing him. If Benny didn't freak the fuck out, it could be the best thing for him. Cas sighed. "And I don't even know why I care. I don't. Not really," he said, frowning.

"Wanna know what I think?" she asked.

"Are you going to shrink my head?" he asked. He wasn't threatening, but the anger inside could have made her feel threatened. She didn't flinch and instead just waited for his answer. He nodded. "Okay, go ahead."

"You're upset Dean didn't listen to you," Jess said. "He's your partner both in your line of work and in your bed, and he's always followed your lead for work."

"No, he hasn't," Cas said, leaning forward and resting his elbows on the table when Jess just blinked at him, confused. "He's always pushed. Always questioned. He knows when to stop, but he makes me a better Cleaner. He calls me on shit, and there have been several occasions where I've changed my plans because of his arguments. He was right every time."

Jess smiled and tucked a lock of hair behind her right ear. "Okay, let me change my initial assessment just a bit. You're upset that he did the right thing because it was messier than the wrong thing."

Cas shook his head, but he knew she was right. He looked down at the table, trying to remember exactly how he felt when Dean introduced Benny to his son. A son he didn't even know he had. The product of his own rape and torture. The daily reminder that he had been used and abused by a family who had taken everything from him, left him broken and damaged, alone with his pain.

"Admitting you're right means admitting the most logical solution wasn't the right solution," Cas said.

Jess leaned forward, resting her hands on the table just a few inches away from Cas' elbows. Close but not too close. "That man went through hell," she said, and Cas looked up at her. "If his child had been taken to the CON, he might never have tried to see him, and then he'd have one more thing to hate himself for."

"He's unstable," Cas said.

"He is," Jess said with a nod. "He's hurting, and he'll be recovering for the rest of his life. Benji was just taken from the only home and only family he's ever known. The two of them are floundering, but they deserve to know each other."

"But Dean made the decision for Benny," Cas said, shaking his head. "He ignored me and-"

"He didn't ignore you," Jess said. "He thinks the world of you, and he's there for you no matter what. But he also knows you're different. You don't think like other people. The compassion and empathy just... You're different," she said, shrugging. "He's your empathy. He's your compassion. That's why you make a great team. You balance each other out."

She was speaking from experience. Ruby was too damn violent and unpredictable. Jess tempered her, and as a team, they were a force to be reckoned with. Jess was Ruby's empathy. Ruby's compassion. Just like Dean had the missing parts of Cas.

"He doesn't question your every move," Jess said. "He doesn't fight you unless he feels he needs to. What he did last night wasn't a spur-of-the-moment thing. It wasn't impulsive. I watched him planning it out in his head the whole drive home. His goal was to keep Benji and Benny as safe as possible while uniting them like they should've been all along."

"They never should've been together," Cas said, voice low. "Benji shouldn't have happened."

"But he did," Jess said, pausing to let it sink in. "And that's not what you're upset about anyway."

Cas ran a hand over his face. "I know."

"Life is messy."

Cas shook his head. "I don't like it."

"Messy can be scary," Jess said with a nod, "but look what messy got you."

Cas chuckled, glancing at the door to the basement. "It got me a ball of emotion and his little brother. They both seem determined to drive me crazy."

Jess smiled, then the smile slowly died away. "You have to talk to them."

"I know," Cas grumbled. "I just don't know what to say to either of them."

"Just tell them how you feel," Jess said, shrugging.

Cas scowled at her. "I don't-"

"No, don't give me that shit," Jess said, scowling right back at him. "You have feelings just like the rest of us. Your reactions to those feelings are different, but you have them, and if I hear you or Ruby try to convince me you're robots on steroids one more time, heads will roll. What Dean did hurt you, even if you can't explain it logically. What Sam did scared you. Again, it's not logical, but that's what happened. Tell them that."

Cas huffed out a bitter laugh. "It's too much. Every time anything happens, I find myself tearing down a wall or two. The me from a year ago would've laughed hysterically had he seen what I've let Dean do to me," he said, a rawness in his chest telling him he said more than he meant to. Jess wasn't an enemy, but she didn't need to know his weak spots either.

"What's the alternative?" Jess asked. "You decide you don't want this anymore, tell him it's over, and you can go back to keeping everyone at a safe distance."

"It doesn't sound so bad," Cas said with a grin.

"No," she said, then nodded toward the basement door, "but I think you like it. Maybe not all of it, but you like having him around. You're fighting it because it's scary, but all the little things are making you feel good. Beyond the sex, you have someone to share meals with. Watch a movie with. Talk about cases with. Share your interests with. It wouldn't be the end of the world if you were single again. You've done it before, you know you can do it, and you liked your life. You just have to decide which one you liked better. And in the meantime, let my husband know you're not going to kill him, because he's been quietly freaking out all night."

Cas sighed as he stood up, cleaning the plates off the table and setting them in the sink. "I used to wonder what they were holding over Ruby's head to get her to behave."

"Yeah?" Jess asked, smirking as she stood up, then leaned against the counter top. "Are you still wondering?"

Cas shook his head. "No."

Jess' pleased little smile was adorable, and had it been another time and place, Cas would have suggested they make use of his bed.

"You can let our significant others out now," Cas said, leaving the dirty dishes in the sink and heading for the living room. "Perhaps you should run the show. I haven't taken orders from a beautiful woman in far too long," he said over his shoulder.

Cas usually didn't leave the kitchen dirty, but he wanted to get the discussion over with. He settled down on the couch, waiting for Jess to bring the guys. Sam and Dean walked in, Sam's shoulders hunched even more than the night before. Dean's facial features were tense, shoulders tight, and Cas wondered if Dean had gotten any sleep.

"Have a seat," Jess said.

Sam sat down on the overstuffed chair opposite the couch while Dean sat on the love seat. There were dirt stains on the knees of Sam's jeans, and Cas decided he would worry about the dirt on his furniture later. Jess sat down at the other end of the couch.

"I-I'm sorry," Sam said. "I shouldn't have asked if I could help you kill them in the first place, and I really shouldn't have pushed. I'm sorry."

"Thank you for apologizing," Cas said with a nod.

Sam winced. "You're not still pissed?"

Cas looked to Jess, then shook his head. "No. I'm hurt by what both of you did, but I'm not pissed."

He didn't miss the surprise that flitted across Dean's features before he carefully composed himself again.

"He deserved to know he has a kid," Dean said, sitting forward on the love seat and resting his elbows on his knees.

Cas looked Dean in the eye. "Do you remember Sam was he was three years old?"

Dean frowned. "Of course I do."

"Was he easy to deal with?" Cas asked. "Or did he cry and throw temper tantrums and frustrate your parents to the point where they collapsed into bed at night, exhausted."

"They love him," Dean said, stubborn set to his jaw. "I'm sure I was the same way. The only reason the two of us survived our childhood was because Mom and Dad loved us. All parents get frustrated over their kids."

"Benny doesn't have that connection," Cas said, shaking his head. "Right now he's in shock, and he's in no position to take on a three-year-old. He's depressed, regularly having severe flashbacks, and he doesn't sleep well because of nightmares. Throwing a kid on top of all that, even if the kid is extremely well-behaved, is a recipe for disaster. Do you want to be responsible for the death of that child if Benny can't handle it and kills him? Or maybe he decides life isn't worth the hassle and takes out himself too?"

"He still needs to know he has a son," Dean said.

Cas huffed, shaking his head. "So fucking stubborn. Fucking frustrating! One minute you tell me you'll do anything, go along with anything I want, and the next you're shoving morals down my throat. If you can't see the reasoning behind something that isn't even my job in the first place, then what the fuck is the point? I'm not the person you want to change me into."

"I don't want to change you," Dean said, sour expression on his face.

"Bullshit," Cas said, getting more upset by the moment. "It wasn't enough that I let you start bringing food into the house, then you decided we should fuck. When that wasn't enough anymore, you decided you wanted to kill with me, but then even living with me wasn't enough, and I had to fit your definition of caring about you more than anybody else. That wasn't enough, and now you want to rewrite some moral code that I don't even have."

"I don't want to change you!" Dean said again, louder that time.

"Stop!" Jess said, and when she had the attention of all three men in the room, she continued. "You both hurt each other with your actions. It doesn't even matter whether Benny should've been introduced to his child or not."

"The fuck it doesn't," Dean said, eyes widening.

"It doesn't matter when it comes to what the problem is between you," Jess said, her words clipped and stern. "Cas doesn't really care what happens to them, and the CON's case workers will be there every step of the way, so no, it doesn't matter. Tell him why it hurt."

Dean huffed and shook his head. "You specialize in couple's counseling now?"

Jess didn't bother responding. She just glared at him.

Dean stared her down for a moment, then sighed. "Okay, fine," he said, looking Cas in the eye. "You didn't trust me, and then you got pissed when I did the right thing. You always tell me I'm the guy with the feelings and you run on logic, but when we were thrown into a situation where I knew in my gut what needed to be done, you got pissed."

Cas shook his head. "But-"

"No," Jess said, holding up a hand. "We're not arguing. We're talking."

The fire that burned through Cas' body was nearly overwhelming. He took a cleansing breath and forced himself to stay calm. "Okay, we're talking."

"I know you didn't want me to throw that on Benny," Dean said, then huffed out a bitter laugh. "That was a huge weight to put on him. I know that. But I also know it was the right thing to do. Lately we've been dealing with cases a little differently than we used to. Working them in a new way. And I know you have to keep an eye on me because it's new, but you never had to before. Not really. You trusted me to do my job."

"I do," Cas said with a nod.

"Not when it comes to the way...," Dean said, then stopped himself, sighing as he looked down at the coffee table. He shook his head and huffed, then looked up at Jess. "We're doing things a little differently. I'm not sticking to the textbook version of a Handler."

"I know," Jess said. "You guys don't have to censor your conversation for us. Ruby and I aren't textbook either, and Sam doesn't have a problem with it. Nothing is really textbook when it comes to what we do for a living. Say what you need to say, and it goes no further than this room."

Dean nodded, then looked to Cas. "With the change in our working relationship, you're right on top of me. I know you have to be. I'm new to this part of it, and I'll admit that I've let my emotions get in the way a couple times, but I'm working on it. I was right there when we all tortured Benny and when we broke into the Gallagher house. None of that was textbook, but I did it. I'm sorry I freaked out when you started in on Benny, and I'm sorry I freaked out over the woman in the cage, but damn it, Cas, I can do this."

"I know you can," Cas said with a nod.

"You were wrong," Dean said, gesturing toward the far end of the family room, where he had introduced Benny to his son. "Had this been a simple kill, you would've been absolutely right, but this wasn't simple from the very beginning. The CON wasn't waiting a few blocks away to pick up Benji, because this was off the books, so we had to do both our job and the CON's job. Search, rescue, recover, and kill. All I did was-"

"Your job," Cas said softly.

Dean nodded. "Yeah."

"The missing parts of me that you bring to the table and make us a team," Cas said.

"I didn't have a problem with you killing Chuck or whatever you ended up doing to Becky and Andy," Dean said. "I wasn't trying to stop you. I was just-"

"Using your empathy and compassion for the betterment of the case and the people involved," Cas said with a small smile.

Dean smiled back. "Yeah," he said, then his smile turned into a grin. "Because you kinda suck at it."

"I do," Cas said, chuckling. The smile died away. "I'm sorry. Besides some recent exceptions while we worked out the kinks in our new working relationship, you've never steered me wrong. Every time I've listened to you, you've been right, and I knew that, yet I fought you last night."

Dean nodded. "And locked me in the basement."

Cas sighed. "Yeah. That too. Partly because I was pissed, but mostly because I didn't want to hurt either of you, and I came very close to it." He ran a hand through his hair. "I'm sorry I didn't let you do your job."

"Thank you," he said softly, then sat back in the seat and settled into a more comfortable position. "Okay, so I did my caring and sharing moment. It's your turn. What did I do that hurt you?"

Cas glanced at Jess, wishing he could get out of it. Go to his room and take a nap. Even lock himself in his office for a few hours. Anything to get out of it. But Dean was waiting. He wanted to know. He wanted to work on it. He wasn't pissed, but instead genuinely wanted to know.

"It's the trust issue with me too," Cas said, shrugging. "It was the look in your eyes when you had Benji in your arms last night at the Gallagher house. It was like you saw me as no more than an animal. Like I was going to rip the kid to shreds. And when we got home, you ran in here to get the kid in Benny's arms quick enough that I would have to go through Benny to hurt the kid. You were hiding him from me."

Dean nodded. "I kinda did. Not because I thought you were an animal, but because Benny told you to kill them all, and he meant any possible kids he might have. You agreed to it."

"I said we'd take care of it," Cas said. "I never agreed to kill Benji, and that was never my intention."

"Oh," Dean said, ducking his head as he ran his palms over his jeans.

"How many innocent people have I killed?" Cas asked.

Dean looked him in the eye. "None that I know of."

"Do you think I'm lying when I say I've never killed an innocent human being?" Cas asked.

Dean shook his head. "No. I believe you."

"So if you knew that about me, why did you think I'd kill Benny's child?" Cas asked, tilting his head to the side just a bit.

"You have a very practical view of life," Dean said, shrugging. "I guess I thought maybe you'd view the kid as something that needed to be put out of its misery. A defective thing."

Cas shook his head. "No. I see darkness in people, and I want to snuff it out. Kill it. Benny and his child had no darkness. Benny only had pain, and Benji hasn't even had a chance in life yet."

Dean sighed. "I'm sorry, Cas. I know that about you and I still got scared. I thought you were gonna kill the kid, and yeah, I purposely waited until you were looking the other way before hightailing it into the house. I figured Benny wouldn't be able to resist him once he saw him, and maybe his protective instincts would kick in, so by the time you got into the house, Benny would convince you to just let him have the kid."

Cas shrugged. "I assumed it was pure emotion on your part, and instead of remembering all the times you've made me wonder what I did to deserve having you as a Handler, I put my foot down and made the situation more tense than it really needed to be."

Dean smiled. "We both fucked up."

"Yeah, we did," Cas said with a nod.

"And I really, really didn't like sleeping in the basement," Dean said with a snort.

"Was it better than when I tied you up and threw you in the tub?" Cas asked.

Dean chuckled. "Yeah, I'll take the basement over-"

"You threw him in the tub?!" Sam asked, eyes wide as he sat forward. "Why would you-?"

"Because I fucked up," Dean interrupted. "It worked and I lived."

Sam opened his mouth to argue, but Dean glared at him, and Sam sat back, huffing and shrugging. "Okay."

Cas wasn't sure why Sam was so touchy about it, but figured it was a pretty odd thing to do. How many people could say their significant other tied them up and put them in a tub as punishment?

"And now it's your turn to hash it out," Dean said, as he gestured to Sam. "You fucked up too last night."

Sam sighed. "It was stupid. I counsel people on that very thing, and yet I went and did it. One of the main reasons the CON is in place is because victims and their family shouldn't be involved in the justice system. It corrupts them and damages them in ways they don't even realize. But there I was, pushing my way into Cas' kill room and trying to convince him to let me slaughter my kidnappers."

"It's a natural reaction to being hurt, Sam," Jess said gently. "You were scared out of your mind. Cas was about to kill them both, and in the moment you thought you could be objective about it."

"Yeah," Sam said, then shook his head. "I'm sorry, Cas. I was out of line."

"I'm not mad," Cas said, shrugging. "I have no hard feelings about it at all. You were still in shock, and the people who hurt you were tied up and vulnerable in my kill room. Almost anyone in your situation would've done the same thing."

Sam smiled. "Thanks, Cas."

Jess took a cleansing breath, then looked to Dean. "I think we have one more thing to discuss. Rip the band-aid off quickly."

"What's that?" Dean asked.

Jess looked Dean in the eye. "Where did you sleep the two nights after you walked out-"

Dean's cheeks flushed. "Shut the fuck up."

"Don't talk to her like that," Sam said, voice low and threatening.

"Sorry, I...," Dean said, grimacing as he looked down at the coffee table.

"Tell Cas where you slept the two nights before he went to your house and dragged you back home," Jess said.

Dean ran a hand over his face, then rubbed his palms on his jeans again. "Okay, fine," he said, shrugging as he looked up at Cas. "I slept on the love seat in their bedroom."

"And why did you do that?" Jess asked. Her voice was gentle, but there was no room for talking his way out of it.

Dean looked down at his jeans, thumb rubbing over the fabric, unable to hold Cas' gaze. "He doesn't need to know this," he said softly.

"Why did you do that, Dean?" Jess asked again.

Dean closed his eyes. "Because I'm fucking scared."

"And why are you scared?" Jess asked.

"He cared more about Ruslan than he did me," Dean said, voice barely above a whisper, and Cas couldn't tell if Dean still had his eyes completely closed or he was just looking down at his lap. "He protected him, let him keep killing, and Ruslan never would've been able to take me if he would've fucking killed him or turned him over to the CON years ago. Cas was able to find him easily, so either he knew where he was or he figured it out in record time."

Cas took it all in, watching carefully as Dean forced himself to remain calm, forced himself to hide the massive amount of pain and resentment he had been feeling ever since Ruslan took him. It must've been eating Dean alive, and Cas suddenly understood why there was that distance between them. Yes, Cas was giving Dean room to heal, but there was something else going on, and this was it.

"I gave him Ruslan's file," Dean said, gesturing toward Cas' office, where he had handed Cas the file so long ago. "I've given him a dozen different folders over the years that could've been him. I wasn't sure any of them were Ruslan until later. Until he did some of the things...," he said, trailing off as he feigned interest in his jeans. "But he told me he didn't want the case. He could've caught him, and I never would've had to go through that. I never would've had to realize what a fucking failure I was at keeping myself safe. Never would've known he couldn't protect me from that."

"So maybe what you were feeling really didn't have much to do with Benny or Benji," Jess said. "Your trust in Cas took a hit, and had it not been for Ruslan kidnapping you, you might not have felt the need to protect Benji from him."

"I don't know," Dean said, shaking his head.

"Yeah you do," Jess said. "Every insecurity you've talked to me about since Ruslan took you directly related to Cas and this thing you've allowed to build up inside you."

"Sounds fuckin' pathetic," Dean said through clenched teeth, reaching up to wipe at his eyes.

Something in Cas' chest ached as Dean desperately held onto all the walls he built. Walls he erected to keep Cas out when all he wanted before Ruslan was to let Cas into every part of him. It hurt to see that pain. It hurt to think he could have prevented it.

"No, it sounds like you had valid reasons to be hurt over the whole thing," Sam said, "but you can't expect him to know what you're thinking or how you're feeling."

"I know," Dean said, nodding.

"It doesn't matter what my reasons were," Cas said, wishing Dean would look at him, and he didn't even know why. Eye contact wasn't something Cas usually wanted, but it was nearly a physical need. "It happened, and there's nothing I can do to change it, but I never meant for you to get hurt. If I could go back and change it, I would, but I don't know how to fix it now that it's happened."

"I need to know it wasn't all a game for you," Dean said, finally looking Cas in the eye. "Did you get off on it?"

Cas frowned, the raw and open expression on Dean's face making his stomach clench, and he suddenly wanted Dean's eyes to be anywhere but on him. "Ruslan taking you? What he did to you?"

Dean nodded. "Yeah. That and the whole cat and mouse game you played, trying to find me. Besting your mentor."

Cas leaned forward and looked Dean directly in the eye. "I promise you I didn't get off on any of it. I wasn't sure I'd get to you in time, and I don't remember ever feeling so driven by something other than my desire to kill."

Dean paused for a moment, letting that sink in, but there was a relief in the set of his shoulders that was noticeable. "Did you give him to Mom so she wouldn't kill you?" Dean asked.

Cas let out a huff of laughter. "I figured it wouldn't hurt to give her a gift, but that wasn't why I did it. I was overwhelmed with a desire to get you home, and I didn't want him around you any longer than necessary. I didn't want Sam near him either. I wanted you safe more than I wanted to watch the life drain from his body."

Dean shook his head, sniffling and wiping at his eyes again. When he looked up at Cas, he was smiling. "I wanted you to say it. As petty as that sounds, I wanted to hear the words."

Cas gave him a small smile. "Why do you think I find humans so frustrating? If you would've just asked me, I would've told you. In fact, I thought I did."

"You said I was the reason you went after Ruslan," Dean said, "but I was too scared to ask if you got off on all of it. I didn't want to know if the answer was yes."

"So you pushed. Wanting a reaction out of me," Cas said, a little more of what made up Dean falling into place in Cas' head. He nodded when Dean smiled. "Was it the reaction you were looking for?"

Dean thought about it for a moment, then shook his head. "Not at first. I was fucked up after Ruslan, and I wanted something, but I didn't know what it was. That whole thing in the bedroom at the cabin, when you were sitting on the bed with me....," he said, voice trailing off to a whisper before he licked his lips and continued. "I kept replaying it in my head, trying to remember if there was a bulge in the front of your jeans. I didn't realize what I was doing at first, but yeah, it bothered me. Then I kinda freaked out about it and I pushed. When you didn't push back and you treated me like I was damaged, I didn't know what to do."

"I was being careful with you because that's what I was told to do," Cas said, remembering that first night. Holding Dean, scared that Dean was crumbling apart right then and there. "Your mother can be scary, but beyond the threats, I didn't want to do more harm, and I took the advice of someone who knew you."

Sam sighed. "You should've asked Dad, not Mom," he said, then chuckled when Cas frowned at him. "Mom is a Cleaner, and she thinks about the world more like you do. I bet if you would've asked Dad, he would've said to treat him like you always did. Treating him different, well, Dean viewed it as a rejection."

"You think you know me?" Dean asked, scowling at Sam.

"Yeah, I do," Sam said confidently. "Cas is harsh on you by quote unquote normal standards, but when he stopped yanking the leash, you thought he didn't care anymore and that he was rejecting this damaged version of you."

Cas let out a huff of laughter. "If I didn't care or if I was rejecting you, I would've dropped you off with Sam and Jess. Let them take care of you."

"Mom would've killed you," Dean said, and he said it lightly, but it held enough weight he held his breath for a moment.

Cas shrugged. "I would've dealt with it."

Dean rolled his eyes, but when he smiled, it was a little more genuine, a little more like the Dean Cas had gotten to know over the years. Whatever they were doing with the talk between the four of them, it was working. Healing the wounds Dean had let fester and Cas should have known to tend to.

Cas had limited experience with things like this. Growing up with a highly emotional older brother and parents that were about the same was difficult for Cas, and he knew he hurt them a lot even if he wasn't intentionally or maliciously doing things to them.

Immediate cause and effect was so much easier to learn from, and Cas was watching it happen. He didn't enjoy talking about feelings, and it was frustrating, but seeing the change in Dean was worth it. He didn't know he wanted to see Dean's shoulders relax until he saw the way the pain in Dean's eyes lifted just a bit. The way Dean seemed to sit _in_ the chair instead of _on_ the chair like he had been doing for weeks, like he could never let go, never let his guard down even though Cas was more than willing to protect him.

"Better?" Cas asked.

"Yeah," Dean said, nodding, then he winced. "Sorry."

Cas didn't have to ask. They had known each other long enough and Dean had teased him more than enough about Cas' frustration with human behavior. Dean didn't need to apologize for it, and he wasn't really. He was apologizing because he knew it was hard for Cas, and it was also a thank you for not giving up, for not telling Dean it was too much and he was done with them.

Jess sighed happily. "I'd tell you guys to kiss now that you've made up, but I don't want Cas to kick me out of the house."

Cas chuckled. "I wouldn't kick you out, especially if you're offering a foursome."

"Dude!" both Dean and Sam blurted, eyes wide in twin expressions of shock.

Jess giggled, shoulders shaking as she looked between the both of them. "They wouldn't survive the night," she said.

Cas groaned, the tiny bit of fear in Sam and Dean's eyes enough to make his cock twitch. "But they'd have a hell of a lot of fun on the way out."

"I love when his eyes get all big and round like that," Jess said, looking at her husband, index finger rubbing over her bottom lip.

Cas, acting on a hunch, leaned forward. "Can you make him scream?"

Jess' eyelids fell just a bit and she moaned. Cas smiled, his hunch turning into a sure thing when he checked the expression on Sam's face and found him blushing. Jess had a fear kink. Cas was sure of it.

"He doesn't flat out scream," Jess said.

"Jess!" Sam said, face turning a darker shade of red.

"He makes these cute little noises," Jess said. "Grunts and gasps. Tiny moans cut off by the fact that he holds his breath when he's trying to control his reactions."

"I don't need to know this," Dean said, shaking his head and covering his ears.

"Dean's very loud," Cas said.

"Cas!" Dean said, his own cheeks flushing.

Jess hummed, looking to Cas. "It would be fun. The contrast between the two."

"Would you two like to stay for pizza and a movie tonight?" Cas asked, the sudden change in subject making both Sam and Dean blink at him like he was out of his mind.

"No!" Sam said, shaking his head. "We have plans tonight. We're very busy. We can do dinner another night. A family night. With Mom and Dad. At the dinner table."

Jess had covered her mouth, shoulders shaking as she tried to keep her laughter under control.

Cas chuckled. "Okay, we'll stop teasing you," he said, grinning. "For now."


	14. Chapter 14

"You good?" Dean asked as he turned a corner and merged into traffic.

"Yes, and you can stop asking," Cas grumbled.

Dean let out a noise that was suspiciously close to a chuckle, but he turned it into a cough at the last moment. "Sorry."

Cas rolled his eyes. He could have driven himself. He should have insisted on it. He should not have had to do it in the first place, but since he had to, then he should have at least driven himself. It wasn't like he was going to no-show. Again. For the sixth time. He would go eventually once the CON threatened termination again. They had gotten extremely close to terminating his contract almost three years ago over it.

"It's not that bad," Dean said.

Cas turned to Dean, not scowling, but something close to it. Definitely not pouting. "Then why don't _you_ take my place and I'll go home."

It wasn't a question, and Dean didn't even try to respond other than wiping the corners of his mouth with his thumb and middle fingers. A move that was probably meant to look casual, but really he was trying to keep himself from smiling or even flat out laughing.

"Ellen would kill me," Dean said, shaking his head.

"She wouldn't kill you," Cas said, almost spitting out the words.

It wasn't that he hated Ellen, it was just that she knew how to handle him. Normally he would have liked that. Liked the fact that she knew what he was and know how to behave around him. Knew how far to push while still getting the job done.

It was more the fact that she was a doctor and Cas really fucking hated doctors and exams and getting poked and prodded. It was the last thing on a very long list of stuff he would ever want to do, and that list included getting kidnapped and tortured again.

"She thinks you're cute," Cas said as Dean pulled into the parking lot of the Connections Medical Institute. It had the appearance of a medical school, but the little play on words was unmistakable for anyone in the CON.

"Ellen? No," Dean said, letting out a huff of laughter. "I annoy her. She barely tolerates me."

Cas snorted. "I thought you were a Handler. You're supposed to be able to read people. She thinks you're cute and lets you get away with flirting. Flirting with the nurses and her and anybody else who walks by the rooms. She also lets you come into the room with me, which I know she doesn't do for anybody but you."

Dean parked the car, then turned to Cas. "Did you ever think maybe it has more to do with you?"

Cas frowned. "She doesn't think I'm cute."

Dean shook his head. "No, you dork. I mean, she does kind of have a soft spot for you, but what I'm talking about is you're calmer when I'm with you. You don't bitch as much over the medical procedures, and you've never hurt anybody while I'm there."

Cas thought about it for a moment. He never realized it before, but Dean was right. It didn't mean he would acknowledge Dean was right, but it did make his chest burn a little. Ellen knew he was easier to work with when Dean was around? Maybe he would have to do something about that.

"No, it's because she thinks you're cute," Cas said, getting out of the car. "And you think it's hot and want to bed a cougar."

Dean laughed, wrapping his right arm around Cas' shoulders, then laughing harder when Cas pushed him away. They walked into the reception area, which was unnecessarily huge, though maybe they did it that way so Cleaners didn't have to sit close to one another if they had to wait. That was probably a good idea.

Cas stood near the elevators while Dean signed them in, flirting with the girl behind the tall counter top. He asked if he could have a piece of the candy from the bowl next to her computer, and she blushed before holding the bowl up for him to pick through. He unwrapped the candy, popped it in his mouth, then winked at her, making her blush even more.

Dean joined him near the elevators and hip checked him. Cas scowled, an urge to slam Dean against the elevator doors nearly overwhelming.

The doors opened, and Dean tugged on Cas' coat, giving him a little smile, and Cas' stupid heart decided it was adorable, so the urge to hurt Dean backed off a bit.

CON medical offices were different than doctor's offices, hospitals, clinics, and other medical buildings. Catering to serial killers and their teammates made it necessary to cut out as many extras as they could. A serial killer who had to remain calm and be pleasant to more than two or three people just wasn't going to happen, so the girl at the front desk would enter the information while they were in the elevator, then the doctor upstairs would get a text on their cell phone, letting them know who was coming up and what room they were being sent to.

Cas was assigned to floor five, room eight. He wasn't assigned to the same room every time, but there were people who needed that, and they were accommodated.

There was no music playing in the elevator, which was always a relief. The lighting wasn't harsh, but it wasn't dim either, and the hallways were carpeted, muted tones on the walls, and random pieces of art that didn't include people or animals, but rather were scenic in various styles, meant to be as un-stimulating as possible.

Cas knew it was all done to keep the serial killers calm, but it didn't piss him off to be handled. Not when they got it right and were doing it to save lives. A serial killer who got triggered by seeing something on the way up to the doctor's office meant a dead doctor, which meant security had to be beefed up, which meant it would take longer for the whole process and Cas would have to deal with security guards.

It was just better the way it was. Cas appreciated it, and he knew others did too. Dean wasn't that thrilled to get exams either, but most of what was done in the building wasn't to cater to the Handlers.

Room eight was the third door to the right of the elevators, and Dean opened the door for him, smiling and waving at Ellen, who was waiting for them on a chair in the back right corner of the large room, sitting at a small desk and typing on a keyboard.

It was yet another accommodation. Serial killers were paranoid people, and to sit in an empty room, waiting for someone to come find them wasn't a good thing. Letting the Cleaners walk into a room where a doctor was already waiting, sitting down, not threatening in anyway was a good solution.

"Good morning, guys," Ellen said as she stood up. She gave Dean a hug, but didn't even attempt to hug Cas. She knew better and had never even tried.

"You stayin' busy?" Dean asked her as he turned and pulled Cas' coat off his shoulders.

Cas kept his arms at his sides, not helping, but it didn't faze Dean. He was used to it. He draped Cas' coat over the rack near the door, then hopped up onto the exam table, plopping his butt down on one end of it.

"They always keep us busy," Ellen said, adjusting her scrubs. Doctors rarely wore scrubs in offices, but throughout the CON it was normal. A doctor's coat didn't go over well with Cleaners, and scrubs seemed to be more acceptable, so that's what the doctors wore.

There was a soft knock on the door, and Cas turned, pulling it open. The man in scrubs, hand still raised, eyes wide in surprise, looked to be in his early twenties. He quickly put his hand down, probably realizing it appeared threatening.

"I'm late," he said, wincing. "I apologize." He nervously pushed his horn-rimmed glasses up, blushing a little.

Cas watched the way the boy moved, and he mentally changed the age estimation in his head from early twenties to between eighteen and twenty. This was definitely a kid. He wondered why they had assigned a kid to be in a room with him. It seemed a little cruel and dangerous, but if that's what the CON wanted, Cas didn't really care. He was just surprised.

"This," Ellen drawled as she wrapped her left arm around the boy's shoulders and pulled him in close, "is Lisa's son."

And Cas had to shift everything around yet again. This was no ordinary kid. The blushing and awkwardness made sense, and Cas leaned back against the examination table, eyeing up the boy.

"Hey, Ben," Dean said, a big smile on his face.

"Hey, Dean," the kid said, ducking his head and blushing even more.

Ellen patted his back and pushed him toward the cabinets built around the desk she had been sitting at. "Get the supplies out while I _help_ my patient get undressed."

"Yes, ma'am," Ben said, hurrying to do as he was told.

Cas could see the family resemblance. Lisa Braeden was a name he hadn't heard in a while, and it had been even longer since he had seen the woman, but there was no question Ben was her son.

He wondered if Ben remembered what had happened when he was only six years old. If he knew just how brave and talented his mom was. Surely other people had told him since. She was damn near a legend in the CON, but hearing it second-hand was nothing like experiencing it, and Ben had.

Fresh out of the academy, caught in a hostage situation where she was the only one between a serial killer duo and the entire freshman class of brand new cadets was a dangerous situation. The fact that her six-year-old son was with her that day only made the situation that much more remarkable.

She had talked her way out of the situation, saving fifty-two cadets, her son, and herself. There were no deaths that day and only a few minor injuries to the cadets and herself.

She had been awarded a medal of honor and less than a year later was heading her own negotiation seminars and classes. She was a natural.

Ellen walked up to Cas, one eyebrow arching upward. "I have a deal for you."

Cas nodded. "Okay."

"If you take your clothes off, let me do my thing, and you're a very good boy for me," she said, keeping it light, a half smile tugging at her lips, "I'll let you ask him one question." She nodded toward Ben.

Cas looked at the boy, who was still gathering medical supplies and setting them up on a tray. The boy hadn't flinched when Ellen had made her offer.

"Why would I want to do that?" Cas asked, feigning indifference. He actually was very curious. More than one question would have been even better, but he would take one if he could get it. "What makes you think he's interesting enough that I'd let you poke and prod me with no complaints?"

Ellen snorted and rolled her eyes. "Please. Don't act like I'm new."

Cas couldn't stop the smile. And he really didn't want to. As much as people rubbed him the wrong way, for some reason Ellen was okay. It was no mistake that she was his permanent doctor in the CON.

"You don't care that she's using you?" Cas asked, leaning to the left so he could look at the boy.

Ben turned, tray in his hands, that blushing innocence still radiating from him. "Is that your one question? If so, it kinda sucks."

Cas let out a chuckle. Okay, so he was even more like his mom than Cas had thought. It was refreshing. Surprising in a good way. If the kid was this comfortable at slipping into characters even though he was only nineteen, he had a long and very good career ahead of him.

"No, it wasn't my one question," Cas said.

Ben nodded. "Okay, then I won't answer it."

"So do we have a deal?" Ellen asked, crossing her arms over her chest.

Cas sighed as he unbuttoned his shirt. "Yes, but the deal doesn't include the urethral swab."

"Are you sexually active?" Ellen asked, because yes, they had the same conversation many times. Cas really didn't like the urethral swab.

"I don't fuck my cases," Cas said, purposely not answering the question.

"Are you sexually active?" Ellen asked, as if she never asked before and Cas hadn't not-answered.

"I'm fucking him," Cas said, nodding toward Dean, forcing himself to keep a straight face as Dean snorted, "so swab his ass and leave my dick alone."

"No," Ellen said as Cas unbuckled his belt and slid his jeans and boxers down.

"I got a tattoo when I was thirteen," Ben said, taking a few steps toward them and standing next to Ellen. "I convinced a friend to do it. It's something I wanted to get since I was about nine and it's directly related to that little hostage negotiation thing my mom and I were involved with. If you can guess what the tattoo is, we won't do the swab."

Ellen huffed. "Don't offer him that! I need to do the swab!"

Ben grinned and shrugged. "He only gets one guess, and he's not going to get it."

"It needs to be done," Ellen said, voice firm.

"C'mon, Ellen," Ben said softly, giving her a little smile. "He's fucking Dean, which means we can test _him_ and get enough to be sure Cas isn't a walking cauldron of STDs."

"Hey!" Dean complained.

Ben ignored him. "Besides, I want to know how good Novak is."

Ellen sighed. "He's going to get it right, and then I'm going to have to listen to Dean whine about what I'm going to have to do to him."

"Wait. What?!" Dean asked, eyes going wide. "What do you have to do to me?"

Ben smirked. "Won't be the biggest thing he's had up his ass."

"Wait. Seriously. What the fuck are you guys talking about?!" Dean asked, then turned and whacked Cas' arm. "What are they talking about?!"

Ellen quietly seethed for a moment, then turned to Cas. "You get one guess. Only one!"

"I get to ask my question first," Cas said.

Ellen clearly wasn't happy about it, and Cas had a feeling she was counting to ten in her head. "Fine. You can ask your question first."

Cas smiled. "Deal." He pulled himself up onto the examination table and sat next to Dean, their knees brushing up against one another.

The exam was fairly quick. Not as quick as Cas would have liked, but Ellen had been doing this for years, and she was efficient. The only thing left on the tray was the swab in a plastic specimen container when she stood back and crossed her arms over her chest again.

"Okay, go," Ellen said. "And your question can't be anything about the tattoo."

Cas ignored her, instead focusing on Ben, who was leaning against the counter top. "Were you scared when it happened? I know you were only six at the time, and any six-year-old would be confused and unhappy with some of the things that happened, but were you scared? Terrified?"

Ben let out a huff of laughter, shaking his head as he looked down at the floor. The kid knew Cas had figured it out.

"No," Ben said, looking Cas in the eye. "I was pissed they shoved me into that locker for five hours, but I wasn't scared, and I certainly wasn't terrified."

"Your mother's badge number over your heart," Cas said without hesitation.

Ben chuckled even as Ellen grumbled about annoyingly intuitive Cleaners and something about cocky interns. 

"Those two men meant nothing to you," Cas said. "They terrified fifty-two cadets, who were planning a career that would have them working with serial killers on a daily basis, but the only two people in that building who weren't scared of those men were you and your mother."

"Is that a question?" Ben asked, smirking.

"No," Cas said, then nodded. "Your mother wasn't even mad when she found out you'd gotten the tattoo."

Ben's facial features softened at the mention of his mom. "No. She was mad at Greg for doing it even though he was blackmailed into doing it in the first place. Me? She hugged me and took me out for ice cream."

Cas smiled. "I've worked with your mother on a few cases. Not for long, and our interaction was purely professional, but I was impressed. She's a good woman."

Ben blushed a bit, and Cas could see now that the kid was doing it purposely, playing the part of the wide-eyed, innocent intern. "Yeah, she is."

"And I'll get dressed now while you two get Dean undressed," Cas said, sliding off the table. "He's going to fight you even before he finds out what you're going to do."

"Okay, this isn't funny," Dean said, tensing. "Are you guys just trying to freak me out or is this a thing? What are you doing?"

"Don't worry," Ellen said as she reached out and started to unbuckle his belt. "I'll be gentle."

Dean spluttered as Cas started to redress and Ben stood with his back to Dean, keeping the tray out of Dean's line of sight as he restocked it with new tools.

"What are you doing?" Dean asked as Ellen unzipped his jeans.

"I'm going to pull your jeans and underwear down," Ellen said as she took him by the wrists and pulled, Dean scooting off the exam table obediently, "bend you over the table, and then your boyfriend is going to stand on the other side of the table and promise to pamper you for the rest of the day. He's going to be very sweet to you, maybe even running his fingers through your hair and kissing the top of your head while I swab your ass. From the inside."

"Shit," Dean breathed, then caught sight of the tray in Ben's hands. "Oh, fuck! Cas, you fucking asshole!"

"I really don't like getting my dick swabbed," Cas said as he buttoned his shirt up.

It wasn't until he looked at Dean that he realized his Handler wasn't just pissed over the situation. He was scared. He was uncomfortable and breathing unsteadily.

Dean was facing the table, and Cas walked up to the other side, something odd tugging at his chest when he saw the fear in Dean's eyes. He didn't know why he said what came out next, but he didn't regret it after he said it.

He leaned over the table, keeping his voice low. "If you really don't want to do this, I'll tell them to stop and I'll let them use the swab on me. No hard feelings."

The fear turned to surprise, which then turned to something that Cas couldn't really figure out, but it wasn't anger. Dean wasn't upset, and his body relaxed just a fraction.

"I want pizza with bacon on it," Dean said, and it was clear that he wasn't requesting, but rather demanding it. Cas hated bacon on pizza, but Dean loved it. "And I wanna watch Die Hard. And I want you to watch it with me."

"Done," Cas said, nodding.

"And you can't fall asleep halfway through," Dean said.

"I'll try," Cas said, because really, how many times could one be expected to watch Die Hard and stay awake?

"You'll stay awake," Dean said, tone of voice firmer that time.

Cas nodded. "I'll stay awake," he said, then stood up straight when Dean started to bend over the table.

His back was rigid, shoulders tense, and it was obvious to anyone that Dean wasn't happy about what was going on, but Cas had offered him an out. An out that Cas wouldn't punish him for choosing.

Cas crouched down, putting him at eye level with Dean, and he put his right hand on Dean's left, which was gripping the edge of the table so tightly that his knuckles were white. Dean liked contact, and even that little bit softened the severity of his facial features just a bit.

"Thank you, Dean," Cas whispered.

"Not the first time I've had a speculum shoved up my ass," Dean said, then grinned. "At least this time I'm getting bacon pizza and Die Hard out of it."

Cas blinked at him for a moment, not really sure, but suspecting that his Handler had played him. Played all of them. Not that Dean wanted a speculum shoved up his ass, but the fear in his eyes was completely gone, and his lips twitched into a smirk.

Cas chuckled, shaking his head. "I suppose I shouldn't be surprised."

"It's still fun to see the look on your face when you learn something new about me," Dean said, then grunted, his nose scrunching up in discomfort. "Does it really need to go that deep?" he complained over his shoulder.

"I'm using the small one," Ellen said, "but I can always switch to the biggest size we have."

Dean winced, squirming a bit. "No, that's okay."

Ellen finished up, and as Dean was pulling his jeans up and buckling his belt, he turned to Ben. "Tell your mom I said hi."

Cas knew Lisa and Dean had dated for a while. They were two very different people, and even though Dean really did like her, they just didn't work as a couple. That didn't change the fact that he really liked her.

"Will do," Ben said, nodding.

"See you boys again next year," Ellen said, then looked Dean in the eye, "and I'll see you in two months when you come in for your physical."

"That didn't count?" he asked innocently.

Ellen shook her head. "Nope, and you know it."

Dean sighed dramatically. "Fine. I'll come see you again in two months."

"Take care, guys," Ellen said, giving Dean one more hug and waving at Cas.

"That was very sneaky," Cas said on the elevator.

"Sneaky? I don't think it was sneaky," Dean said, flashing him a smile. "Well played? Definitely."

Cas chuckled as they got off the elevator and headed for the front doors. Dean pulled out his keys.

"So how did you know about Ben's tattoo?" Dean asked as they got into the car.

"Lisa and Ben are both high-functioning sociopaths," Cas said. "I wasn't sure of it until I asked if Ben was scared during the hostage situation."

"So that means the kid wasn't scared by the two guys," Dean said as they pulled out onto the street, "but how does that help you figure out the tattoo?"

"When they shoved him in the locker, Ben was holding his mom's badge," Cas said. "Even when they interviewed him on TV, Ben said he got through it by running his fingers over the badge, feeling the lines and bumps. At the time the media played it as a scared little boy who was clinging to a small piece of his mother to get him through, but once Ben told me he wasn't really scared, I knew the tattoo wouldn't have anything to do with the two serial killers because they weren't the ones who had an impact on his life. It was his mother. He feels a strong connection to her, and to honor her and memorialize the very career he knew she was perfect for, he had her badge number tattooed over his heart."

"How did you know it was over his heart?" Dean asked. "I mean, yeah, it would make sense for somebody very sentimental to do that, but he's a sociopath."

Cas smirked. "After Ben talked about the tattoo, he turned around and rubbed his hand over the spot. He thought I wouldn't see him do it with his back turned to me."

Dean huffed out a laugh, and they drove in silence for a few minutes before Dean reached over and put his hand on Cas' left upper thigh. "And is getting your dick swabbed really that bad?"

"Yes," Cas said, nodding. "It both tickles and burns, then my dick feels strange whenever I pee for the next two days. I really hate it."

"Aren't you the same guy who told me how awesome sounding feels?" Dean asked.

"We'll try it one day," Cas said, keeping his tone of voice light. "I'll make you come with nothing but a sound pumping in and out of your dick, then later I'll push a Q-tip into your urethra and swirl it around. You can tell me all the reasons why it's completely different."

Dean snorted. "That's okay. I'll pass. I believe you."

Cas just smiled.


	15. Chapter 15

It had been two weeks since Benny's kidnappers had been picked up, their bodies disposed of. Two weeks of getting back to what Cas and Dean called normal. It was comfortable and familiar in a way that hadn't even been there _before_ Ruslan took Dean.

Cas was content, and after more of Dean's stuff was moved into Cas' house, it seemed that Dean was content too. Dean wasn't getting rid of his own place, and both of them knew it was a security blanket. A little buffer between casually trying this thing out they were doing versus being stuck with each other.

"What about this one?" Dean asked, pushing a manila folder across the desk. He scratched at his stomach through his T-shirt, the drawstring of his sweatpants untied as he sprawled in the chair.

Cas was in pajama bottoms and a hoodie. It was Dean's hoodie, and, probably fearing for his life, Dean hadn't done more than smile when he had seen Cas in it.

"Hmm, I haven't done a drug dealer in a while," Cas said, shuffling through the pages. "Looks interesting. What caught _your_ eye?"

Dean grinned. "Look at where they've found most of the bodies."

Cas pulled up one of the police reports, scanned the page, then frowned. "Florida? I don't fly."

"Yeah, I don't want to either," Dean said, shrugging. "Road trip would be fun, though."

Cas winced. "Florida? It's so wet. Humid. You never dry off," he said with a sour expression on his face.

Dean chuckled. "You big baby. You don't like going to the beach?"

"We live in California," Cas said, sure that he didn't need to explain any further.

"Yeah, but we've already seen these beaches," Dean said, then pushed a piece of paper toward Cas. "Check it out."

Cas looked at the top of the paper, where the printing information was. "You printed this over half an hour ago," he said, holding the resort listing up.

Dean's mouth quirked up into a half smile. "I wanted to make sure you got bored with the other cases and would be more willing to go after a drug dealer."

Cas sighed. "I wondered why we were getting nothing but search and recover requests."

Dean pointed at the paper in Cas' hand. "Jacuzzi. In the room. Awesome room service. You don't even have to leave the room to eat unless you want to. I won't even try to get you to go in the pool. I know that grosses you out."

Cas re-read the amenities, impressed and a little intrigued. "I'll think about it."

"That's all I ask," Dean said, pulling out another folder and leafing through the contents.

"What if I find a beautiful woman I want to bring back to the room?" Cas asked, keeping an eye on Dean. Waiting for a reaction. "Or a man."

Dean looked up, face a mask. "You could do that if you wanted to."

"What if I asked someone to come up and fuck you while I watched?" Cas asked.

Dean opened his mouth to respond, but just sat there. Cas couldn't figure out if Dean liked the idea or not.

"Gave them instructions," Cas continued. "Tied you up on the bed, blindfolded you. You'd have no idea what was going on. Who was touching you. And whoever I chose could make you come over and over again until you begged for it to end. When they were finished with you, I'd get the sloppy seconds."

Dean let out a bark of laughter. "Okay, now I know you're just fuckin' with me. No way you'd fuck me with somebody's junk leaking out of me. I doubt you'd even let the guy fuck me without a condom on anyway."

"You didn't answer the question," Cas said, setting the paper down on the desk and leaning forward, resting his elbows on the desk.

Dean sobered, the smile dying away. He nodded. "Yeah, you can do whatever you want. But then it's my turn."

"And what's going to happen with your turn?" Cas asked.

"I get to be Batman," Dean said with a straight face. "You're Robin, and I get to fuck my sidekick."

Cas tried to hide it, but finally he smiled, and Dean chuckled. "Roleplay?" Cas asked.

Dean nodded. "Yeah. It's fun."

"You don't want to play the serial killer and his victim?" Cas asked, gathering up the papers in front of him and stuffing them back into the manila folder.

Dean shrugged. "Been there. Done that. Didn't get to come, but the serial killer did."

"That's because the victim was naughty," Cas said, grinning.

Dean swallowed, eyes going a little wide. "I've been good."

"Very good," Cas said, nodding. He could see a tiny bit of fear in Dean's eyes, and it excited him.

"What happens to a good victim?" Dean asked, voice cracking.

"It's not a whole lot different than a naughty victim," Cas said, shrugging. "Except the good victim gets to come and doesn't leave the room with tears running down his cheeks."

Dean nodded, smirking. "That _does_ sound nice. Preferable to the other way."

Cas logged out of the CON's website and locked his computer before standing up. "I lied about the tears thing."

Dean's eyes widened as Cas came around the desk. "Oh, fuck," he breathed as he stood up and backed away.

Cas purposely gave him room, and when Dean took off running for the kitchen, Cas stalked after him, cock already taking an interest in what was going on.

It wasn't until Dean was standing on the far side of his steel table in the kill room that Cas realized how much fun he was having. He had never played with anybody in the kill room before. At least not purely for sexual reasons. Before Dean, he hadn't even let anybody else in who didn't leave in a body bag.

He never even entertained the idea. Not before Dean. Yet Dean had a place in his life, in his home, and the small, primal part of Cas' head was telling him he should be more upset about it than he really was. He shouldn't get this close to someone or let them into his life so completely.

And yet there he was, locking the door behind him and stalking toward Dean, his cock almost completely hard already, the small amount of fear in Dean's eyes making it all even better.

"You shouldn't be in here," Cas said, calmly pocketing a bottle of lube from one of his drawers.

"I heard a noise," Dean said, wide eyed and innocent. "I didn't mean to invade your privacy. I was worried about you. Neighborly concern and all."

"Oh, so you haven't done anything wrong?" Cas asked, rounding the corner of the table as Dean kept his distance.

Dean shook his head. "No. I've been very good."

Cas rounded another corner and Dean danced back, keeping himself directly across from Cas. That wouldn't do. Not at all.

"What're you-hey!" Dean yelped as Cas dropped to the floor and lunged for Dean's legs under the table. He tried to back away, but Cas had a hold of his ankles, and Dean went down on his ass hard. "Mr. Novak!" Dean yelled, trying to push Cas off him as Cas climbed on top of him and straddled Dean's hips.

Dean wasn't trying very hard to get Cas off of him, and Cas felt only a small tug of disappointment at that. He would have to talk to Dean about other kinds of roleplay. Rougher and more violent. He didn't know if Dean was up for it, but he suspected he was. Being in a relationship, he would have to talk about it first, though. It was different, but not completely awful.

"What are you doing, Mr. Novak?" Dean asked, panting a bit like he was scared, although trying to keep his emotions in check.

"I'm going to play with your penis," Cas said.

Dean froze, the corners of his mouth twitching. Yeah, okay, so Cas knew he sucked at dirty talk. Especially when it involved roleplay and staying in character.

Much to his credit, Dean recovered and opened his eyes even wider, playing up the innocence. "Oh, I don't know about that, Mr. Novak. We've barely met. Shouldn't you buy me dinner or something first?"

Well, at least they were a matched pair with the really bad dirty talk. Cas decided it was time to abandon the dirty talk attempts and instead shifted his hips, dragging his crotch over Dean's.

"Oh, fuck," Dean moaned, closing his eyes, all traces of innocence gone as he tried to thrust up, tried to get more friction.

Cas reached down and pulled Dean's sweatpants down, the elastic catching on the underside of Dean's balls. Dean bit his lip as Cas scooted forward and moved back and forth over Dean's exposed cock, the thin material of Cas' sleep pants making it easy to slide Dean's dick between his ass cheeks.

He pulled the lube out of his pocket and slicked up his right index and middle fingers before reaching around and pushing his fingers inside his own hole. It took a moment for Dean to realize what was going on, and when he did, he let out a whine.

"Fuck, Cas, that's so fuckin' hot!" Dean said, voice wrecked already and his cock twitching.

He hadn't let Dean fuck him. In the last few months Dean had only mentioned it a couple of times, and he never pushed, but it was clear that Dean _wanted_ to fuck him. Technically Dean still wasn't really fucking Cas. Cas was in charge and was going to control every bit of it. It was a safe way for Cas to test the waters.

Cas didn't bother prepping himself more than that, and instead pulled his fingers out, then wrapped his hand around Dean's cock, slicking him up.

"Fuck yeah! Oh, fuck, Cas, yeah!" Dean said, fingers digging into Cas' thighs as Cas pushed his sleep pants down just enough that he could reach back and guide Dean's hard cock into his ass. "Oh! Oh, fuck yeah!"

Dean let out a long, satisfied moan as Cas sank down onto his cock. Cas hadn't been fucked in a long time, but he played with himself often enough that Dean's dick slid in fairly easily, filling him and stretching him just right.

"Hold still," Cas said as Dean tried to wriggle around a bit.

Dean whined again. "Fuckin' bossy even as a bottom."

Cas chuckled, then squeezed his asshole, making Dean gasp, eyelids drooping. "You're complaining?"

Dean shook his head. "No. No, I'm really not. It was an observation."

"Ah, I see," Cas said, then pulled himself up before dropping back down on Dean.

Dean winced. "I'm at that point where I'm going to come embarrassingly fast if you keep moving, but I really don't want you to stop."

Cas leaned back, putting his palms on the floor to either side of Dean's legs as he started riding Dean, his hard cock flopping back and forth as he found a good angle and managed to make Dean's dick hit him in just the right spot with nearly every downstroke.

"Can't even fuckin' look at you," Dean said, squeezing his eyes shut. "So fuckin' hot like that. I don't wanna come yet," he said as he reached out and grabbed Cas' cock, stroking him.

Cas moved faster, fucking up into Dean's fist, then slamming himself back down onto Dean's cock, his thighs aching pleasantly, his knees grinding into the hard floor.

"Ah shit," Dean hissed. "Fuck, I'm gonna come. I can't hold-ah, fuck! Cas! Oh, fuck!"

Cas slammed down even harder, squeezing Dean on the upstroke and riding him as Dean tried his best to fuck up into him, his fist moving fast over Cas' cock, tight and slick from the lube he snagged from Cas.

Dean let out a long groan, then sighed as he came down from his high, and Cas didn't give him a chance to recover before he knee-walked up and straddled Dean's face, pushing his cock in and fucking Dean's throat.

Cas was so close that Dean's struggles and muffled gagging sent him over the edge, and he came down Dean's throat with a whimper before pulling out and sliding down Dean's body until he was level with him, then just let go, spreading out over him.

"That was hot," Dean said, voice wrecked not only from coming, but also from the abuse his throat received from Cas' cock.

"No talking," Cas said.

Dean chuckled. "Like that's gonna happen."

Cas sighed. "You're a pain in the ass," he grumbled as he pulled himself up, getting to his hands and knees before standing up and adjusting his sleep pants.

Dean took Cas' hand and Cas pulled him up too. "Yeah, well, I know I've got a big cock, so you really should've prepared yourself better. Next time it won't be such a pain in the ass."

Cas shook his head, rolling his eyes. "Get in the house. I need a shower. Maybe a nap too."

Dean was in his kill room. He was in Cas' home and his life, infiltrating every aspect. He frustrated Cas and questioned him more than he agreed with him. He left wet towels on the floor and served Cas coffee most mornings. He snuggled with Cas on the couch while they watched movies and smiled without hesitation when bringing home sandwiches from their favorite shop.

Cas knew years ago he wasn't ready for everything that came along with having Dean in his life, so fully integrated, and even though it still wasn't easy, it was good. It was something he wanted. Something he didn't know he could ever have. Something he didn't know he even wanted. Once he had it, he didn't know what he would do without it, and that scared him.

Gabriel was going to tease the shit out of him if he found out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's it for Part 2 of the CONventional Psychopathy 'Verse. Thank you to everybody for reading, leaving comments, and giving me kudos <3
> 
> Soon I'm going to start posting Part 3 of the series. There's going to be new tags on the next part, as per usual, so make sure you read them carefully. As always, if you have questions or would like spoilers, please IM me on Tumblr/LiveJournal/Dreamwidth or you can email me (mayalaenATgmailDOTcom).
>
>> **Part 3: Differential Association**
>> 
>> Not having much luck when it comes to their latest cases, Cas and Dean stumble upon another serial killer when their suspect is kidnapped. With no information to go on, will they be able to find the kidnapper before the victim turns up in the woods, just like all the others?
> 
> If you'd like to be notified immediately when I start posting again, please subscribe to the series page or my user account here.


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